iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,626 Blog Posts

I’VE SQUANDERED MY GAINS FOR THE DAY

I don’t know how it happened, per se — but I am now BREAKEVEN for the day with the NASDAQ +170. This morning I booked a SUNDRY of gains and felt really sure-cocked about myself. I shifted to an 80% cash position and then started to slowly crawl back into the market. Said crawling, more or less, has fucked me for 100bps.

I stand here whipping in the wind, wondering where it all went wrong. I am now 80% long, two inverses in the mix which are certain to produce losses, and I feel like all of my picks are floundering — just sort of lying there in the sun getting baked.

An important rule of thumb for me is recency bias. If I do not like the stocks I own now, I sell them. It costs me nothing and provides me with a clean slate, which I like a great deal. Oh how I wish a clean slate were available to me in other facets of my life — but I am old now, 44 and aging rapidly, and the time for do-overs has long passed. At my age, I am only interested in legacy, building my net worth, and perhaps leaving some money to my ungrateful children.

Or, maybe I will leave the money to iBankCoin and keep it running for the next thousand years, hiring other Fly’s to lead the site into the darkest most depraved areas of finance.

One thing is for certain, I want my stocks to go up now and I hate looking at them flounder. Nothing worse than inaction.

Life for me, recently, has been back to the gym, tennis, and trying to pick out a country club to join. My fucking tennis coach is an extreme bastard and I secretly hate him, but will not give my wife the satisfaction of knowing this — otherwise she’ll weaponize it against me. I have lessons today and I cannot help but to give him an evil stare when he chastises me with his inane platitudes built for 8yr old boys. I want to, if I’m being honest, take my tennis racket and crack it over his head. Last week, while trying to correct me, I made sure to beam a ball back at him as hard as I could, which caught him off guard and nearly removed his head from his body. Perhaps tonight I will be successful.

I’m up 20bps now. Farewell.

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A GLORIOUS MORNING

Up 100bps out from the gates. I took this opportune to sell and also hedge against my remaining 25% long exposure.

NUGT +4.7%
LAC +7.9%
DDOG +3.8%
RWT +3.3%
GSX +2.6%
BE +2.4%
GLUU +1.1%
(KODK -2.3%)
ENPH +4%
INFY +0.6%
BHC +1.6%
CARS +1.6%

All small gains — but I never liked those stocks in the first place. I am moonlighting — here for a short time and a good time. Truth is, markets are heaving and will soon COLLAPSE. I do not want to be caught long, holding my testicles in my hand — eating a chocolate bar.

This is a greedy greedy tape. Be careful about those ovens.

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THE FLY IS HOTTER THAN A PISTOL NOW

I was going to say the Pacific Northwest, but that’d be fucked since people have died. Truth is, I ended Friday like a cucked faggot, saddled with 4 inverse ETFs and about 10 longs. Immediately I closed them out because I knew today would be a melt up. I knew this because breadth was 75% and we hadn’t been that strong in weeks.

Today was a true rally, broad spectrum — motherfucking GAMMA SQUEEZE.

Mid day I was barely up 100bps, but then I turned it into hyper-drive and made one trade after the next, virtually at will, to bring my daily gains up to 270bps.

ZYME +15.3%
BNTX +7.6%
RIOT +4.1%
(TZA -6.3%)
(SRTY -6.1%)
(SOXS -9.1%)
(FNGD -10.1%)
UAA +2.9%
(FMCI -5.2%)
MRNA +4.9%
NK +4.4%
HCAC +2.6%
LI +5.4%
NVAX +3.7%
(AMRS -5.9%)
PEIX +1.9%
VBLT +2.7%
SRNE +7.2%
ALT +4.8%
WKHS +4.3%
OSTK +2.3% x2
INO +3.9%

My biggest trade was extricating myself from OSTK, which was -18% as of Friday. I doubled down this morning and caught 6 on the upswing, closing out the position at a profit. Now if you’re thinking about joining Exodus because “MUH LE FLY IS GONNA TEACH ME”, I’m saddened (not really) to disappoint. I am not gonna teach you shit. Can Usain Bolt teach a fat fuck how to run? Does a shark teach a gold fish how to hunt?

While the zebra is certain to write the headlines, mankind is pressed forward by the lion. I only offer you greatness by way of duplication. It’s the best I can do.

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Breadth is Strong; Stocks Cannot Fall Today

I enjoy tempting the stock gods to fuck with me. I spit into their faces and dare them to harangue me with losses. I post titles such as this, not because I am obligated to boast about the wins in the stock market, but because I can. I am able to afford to do this because I make money almost every single day in the market and there’s not a god damned person who can stop me.

Sure, I fucked up on Friday buying INVERSE ETF hedges — but I closed them out and have been trading well all day. While my gains are merely 1.1%, I am pleased with the specter of future gains — as stocks have broken the fuck out again and should be swimming higher for the remainder of the week.

My trades for today.

ZYME +15.3%
BNTX +7.6%
RIOT +4.1%
(TZA -6.3%)
(SRTY -6.1%)
(SOXS -9.1%)
(FNGD -10.1%)
UAA +2.9%
(FMCI -5.2%)
MRNA +4.9%
NK +4.4%
HCAC +2.6%
LI +5.4%
NVAX +3.7%
(AMRS -5.9%)
PEIX +1.9%
VBLT +2.7%

I am 20% cash and have been taking PIKER STYLED returns as of late, small little bitch like gains and losses — mainly because the market has been giving me such. At times I am blessed with 100% big titted gains and other times, like now, middling. Not too long ago, my portfolio was moving higher at a 5% daily clip; now I am pleased with a 1.5% return.

Things change and markets are always transitional. Keep your eyes on the ball son, otherwise you might catch one between your eyes on day.

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Good Morning, Stocks Are Heading the Fuck Higher Again

Nikola responds to THE HINDENBURG report. I really don’t give a shit, so I didn’t read it. However, I did enjoy this clip a great deal — THE NIKOLA CHALLENGE, whereby a lad takes his car and places it in neutral down a slope and hits 50mph doing so. This is relevant because it is the exact spot NEE KO LA took their bullshit truck and rolled it downhill and pretended like there was a fucking engine inside of it.

Look pal, the world is a giant scam. If you don’t know it now, soon enough you’ll find out. We’re all just fancy dressed penguins on this flat planet in the middle of nowhere, hoping for a semblance of meaning to be imparted to us before we drop dead. You will not find any such wisdom from trading stocks; but it can and will make life better by way of providing you with money to purchase happiness. Yes, it’s true, happiness can be bought, but the price is always rising and like any drug — once you start taking it — you will need more and more to maintain an equilibrium.

Nothing is worse, however, than having some money and then losing it, so keep those fucking stops tight and your position sizes under 10%, else I’ll come to your house and punch your jaw loose.

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NIKOLA FOUNDER SEEKS BLOOD LUST ON SHORTS, PROMISES TO EVISCERATE THEM NEXT WEEK

Many of my readers are antiquated gentlemen of substance who spend their days in their oak paneled rooms, sipping on an estate pipe, and do not access the low world of social media to keep up to speed with current events. In case you’re one of those chaps, let me bring you up to speed on the recent events concerning Tesla wannabe start-up, Nikola — ticker NKLA.

The stock came public via SPAC and had been soaring up until a research firm uproariously named Hindenburg issued a scathing report, highlighting what might amount to be fraud by Nikola founder, “Trevor”, on a massive scale. I of course, like many of you, give Trevor the benefit of the doubt and look forward to his rebuttal.

Here are some of the Hindenburg highlights.

It goes on and on. The stock, as you could imagine, careened lower on this news and sent shockwaves throughout the burgeoning “EV community.” While the company has yet to officially respond, Trevor has been very active on social media and issued the following statements.

So naturally people have been fucking with Trevor, tracking down where he is at all times, in the event he might want to seek refuge in Syria or some place without an extradition treaty with the United States.

He even managed to chime in on this ongoing intrigue via Twitter.

Next week should be an interesting one for shareholders of NKLA and NKLAW.

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The Signs Are Everywhere — You Only Have to Look

I closed down 0.6%, after frenetically trying to day trade myself back to profit. I had a deeper hole earlier, thanks to a sinking OSTK position, which I permitted to drop below my -10% limit because I intend to double down on the position on Monday. I traded well and had a perfect streak — but still came up short.

CODX +8.5%
GSX +2.5%
VXRT +4.8%
MBIO +2.4%
WKHS +2.8%
KODK +3.2%

One could say I profited at will and indeed I would say it’s fair to make that declaration. Truth is, I have a tremendous advantage over all of you and no I am not going to boast of my IQ and innate abilities, but instead remind you that I am building a WORLD CLASS data platform for equities and have built in very fast tools that help me asses the market with ease and splendor.

Stocklabs will be launched sometime this decade.

So here we are again, attempting to find the seam for next week. Just look around and bear witness to the malevolency on this 19th anniversary of the WTC attacks. Nothing has changed and yet everything seems different.

Closing prices!

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Encouraging Tape — But Losing Money Thus Far

The day is young, but I like what I see. The breadth is more or less at 50% — both Dow and Nasdaq sharply higher. Commodities are dead — and I closed out my hedges for small losses. Still, I am off by about 1% this morning, thanks in large part of a pastiche of stocks not doing much of anything but trade lower. But I like my chances catching a seam today — because it’s Friday and because God has designated me as his go to money making machine on this flat flat planet.

In the event I am wrong, I suspects I could lose up to 3% today, given the shit that I own. But let’s not think about that and instead focus on the fact that I am 50% cash, with 100% of my balls intact.

Lots of momo stocks are getting hit and it looks like a giant raping out there. Nevertheless, I remain stoically optimistic!

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Markets Crash into 9/11 Remembrance

The day everything changed in the simulation and America transformed into a big fat retarded country filled with fucked faces is tomorrow — 19 years since the crime of the century. And to that end, markets PLUNGED 400 after opening up cock-strong.

Le Fly vacillated betwixt positions all day — trading his way into a stalemate, in order to preserve his gains. I was up 2.5% at the peak and ended up 1.65%.

My trades.

OSTK +14.7% x2
EXK +5%
DRIP +2.7%
DMYT +6.1%
YELP – wash
(PING -2.2%)
NOVA wash
JMIA +1%
ICLK wash
DDOG +1.6%
BLNK +0.4%
(BE -1.75%)
(FEAC -4%)
(RXT -4%)
(DPHC -4.8%)
WTRH +8%
(VISL -5.7%)
CODX +9.3%
AGEN +5.3%
CEMI +3.1%
ERY +4%
(MRNS -3%)
(UPWK -1.9%)

I closed the session hedged with inverse ETFs and some runners, 40% cash. I suspect markets will want to tank soon — really go lower in order to apply the blade to TikTok investors. In case you’re curious, this is your typical TikTok investor.

Fuck these people.

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Markets Churning — Be Mindful of Your Positions

This is where you get off the ride. It was a nice run — but the professionals will take it from here. Junior at the trading turret is back to fetching lattes for the PMs and you, Sir, are back to reading blogs about people with seemingly unreal super powers when trading.

I will have you know, as markets flatline and churn fuckers into fatty butter, Le Fly stands before you at SESSION HIGHS. How did a man, such as myself, achieve this great feat? Simple: I adapted to the winds. Do not try this at home — for you are more apt to blow yourselves up and zero the accounts out. You watch, and join Exodus, and you sit down and eat fish.

I am the fisherman. Sometimes the seas are choppy and I catch carp and it ends up biting off one of the arms of the weaker members on the fishing yacht. But lo and behold, you give me a market like this and BAM! +250BPS for the day.

I am not done.

It’s been a busy day.

OSTK +14.7% x2
EXK +5%
DRIP +2.7%
DMYT +6.1%
YELP – wash
(PING -2.2%)
NOVA wash
JMIA +1%
ICLK wash
DDOG +1.6%
BLNK +0.4%
(BE -1.75%)
(FEAC -4%)
(RXT -4%)
(DPHC -4.8%)
WTRH +8%
(VISL -5.7%)
CODX +9.3%

I sense a turn here. We are seeing money slosh into COVID-19 virus plays and there is a pervasive weakness in the tape that feels and looks like a trap. Be careful out there — for it will get worse before it gets better.

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