18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,695 Blog Posts

Imagine Not Owning Bolawrap Stock Into Defund the Police Demands

Every 10 years a no-brainer trade comes upon you. It’s so simple and sensible, it almost feels rigged making money in it. I imagine some of the lads trading railroad stocks or automobile plays back in the early 1900s felt the same as I did when I bought and sold the internet invention during the late 90s. Sadly, none of you young punk bitches were around back then and only have experienced a Fed bullied up market, with participants stuck long with Fed dicks in their mouths.

Alas, I bring you a way to profit from all of the chaos in the country.

Now that the police are deemed unnecessary, I think it makes sense to explore NON-LETHAL forms of weaponry. Whether this makes sense from a law enforcement point of view is immaterial to me. I am all about profiting from the pain and anger of others, and then taking said profits and buying champagne with it. Eventually, I will leave the country and use my returns to oversee your national demise, most likely thru long dated PUT CONTRACTS — but that’s a story for another day.

I’ve been long WRTC since $9 and some of the cowards inside Exodus sold right away — because they lacked grit and the eternal fortitude to see it through. If you recall, about a decade ago, TASR was popping off, now AAXN, and people said they’d never make it because law enforcement preferred to shoot people into the face with brass munitions only.


As you can see now, cops like tasing and shooting people, without real prejudice.

How high can WRTC go?

Sky is only the view, not the limit. Short sellers will be BOLAWRAPPED to the fucking face, all year long.

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Market Massively Melts Up — What Else is New?

I’m only 55% invested — up 2% on my positions — just 1% overall for the session. It’s nothing and not a big deal. The Dow is higher by 350, Nasdaq nearly 200. The biggest winners can bw found in the Chinese Burritos — with massive explosions in LFC, BABA, BIDU and many others. I look at GSX, with 70% of its shares sold short, and just gawk in awe of the spectacle.

We all suspect the market, at some point, is going to head lower. Holding and buying here is equal to daring the stock Gods to fuck with you. It has been a very profitable trade.

Speaking of trades, you will no longer be able to trade TVIX, UGAZ or any of the Velocity Shares. Credit Suisse nuked them. I can’t blame them. Why even bother letting retail plebs gains access to market destroying products? Many of these ETNs and ETFs should be suspended. Also, people with accounts less than $250k should be RESTRICTED from selling short. And, people with less than $100k should be BANNED from trading altogether. To gain access to capital markets, you should have to prove your net worth and a certain level of personal success. Out with these Robinhoodded traders, playing options from the discomfort of their housing tenements.

You cannot and will not ruin an otherwise splendid market with your rancid ideas and backward thinking!

Off to find a few trades.

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Summer Malaise is Real at House Fly

Not much going on this summer. I’ve got a house and resort accommodations for Asheville later on this summer, with really not much else to do thanks to the fucking travel ban. My sole desire now is to acquire an E bike; but I can’t justify buying some fucking bike for $3k that doesn’t really take me anywhere.

Where will I go?


But gone are the days of toiling up steep hills with a bike. I’ll be motoring my way soon, once I can officially request this gift for XMAS 2020.

After the kids are all off to college, in about two years, I’m moving the fuck out of this batshit country. Gonna travel around and see different things before I decide where to stay. You absolute fuckheads are forced to stay for your diversity trained jobs in fuckmerica. I am independently wealthy and do not need to punch clocks.

America’s birthday is over and tomorrow is a trading day to behold. Lots of fuckery happening, yet futures are up another 100. Nothing is able to stop it and it’s quite remarkable.

I’m back to drinking again, after 6 months of abstinence — but I hate it. Not having booze all those months made me feel better and cleaner. I think I’ll give it up altogether, save special occasions.

Life so far in NC has been uneventful. I spend most my days going on walks, cooking, writing and trading, followed by movie nights with fam. Not much to do in this COVID-19, post modernism riotous world.

It’s a slow dripping black strapped molasses existence these days.


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Happy 4th of July to All

I was going to pen a woke July 4th blog, but lost my desire to mock my fellow Americans — because it’s just not that fun anymore. It’s easy for me to sit back and coast and revel at the lunacy, but much much harder when I have to think about my children and their children and how all of this manifests itself over time.

July 4th used to mean mats of firecrackers being strung together amidst beer cans and people whistling in the streets, throwing M-80s at one another — a smokey haze of blue and red and the overwhelming smell of gunpowder. By the end of the night, a few lost fingers, several dead — but most of us were happy because we got to light shit up. It was the anarchy and the violence of 4th of July that made us happy, which is probably the main driver of what is driving today’s BLM riots.

We’re way past social reform and anti-racism, bordering now and encroaching into outright civil revolt. Again, and I’ve said this before, both sides of the aisle (I hate that fucking expression) hate this country for different reasons. It’s only the far left that draws the far right into the center and vice versa. The center representing status quo and pro-American ideals — ensconced in war and crony capitalism and profligate spending etc.

Eventually, the tinder-box will explode and you’ll truly hate living here, which is why I am the fuck out of here at my earliest convenience. Most of you will stay and suffer amidst social discord, absurd healthcare expenses, taxes, and a cultural disease that only gets worse by the year. Your only respite will be to watch your youth die, via cable news shows, in stupid and needless wars overseas — because industry demands it and empires are cool and fun to build.

Having said all of that, I enjoy the company of my fellow Americans of all colors and political backgrounds. I couldn’t give a fuck about it and just want to laugh and drink and be entertained, eat and then cavort. After done, cavort some more. I hope you enjoy your holiday and remember the days as a boy when American meant something to you — a magical time when we were the good guys and the flag was cherished because it represented freedom.


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Afternoon champagne coupes, coupled with gratuitous amounts of CARBS. I’ve been dry to the bone since early November, because I wanted to give up booze. I felt I liked it too much. Plus I wanted to get back to the gym and chisel my body.

All of that shit is over. North Carolina is locked the fucked down and the summer climes are here, so it’s time to drink a lot again and eat whatever the hell I want. Plans for this summer is limited, vacations to Blowing Rock and Asheville, peruse old F. Scott haunts and drink a lot.

Any questions?

I’ve had a big year so far, up more than 230% — trading like an machine.

I’m blogging on my iPad now and I don’t feel like linking to anything, but remember to sign up for Stocklabs beta, truly coming soon. I cannot stress this enough. It will be the best god damned financial platform you’ve ever used.


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Let’s peruse, if you will, some of this morning’s headlines.

Record jobs gain of 4.8 million in June smashes expectations; unemployment rate falls to 11.1%

American Airlines says it’s overstaffed by 20,000 employees for fall schedule

Oil demand to return to pre-pandemic levels by 2022, Goldman says

House passes bill that funds $10 billion in grants for child-care facilities

Epstein friend Maxwell arrested on sex abuse conspiracy, perjury charges

Cramer: Blowout jobs gains reflect an ‘optimism’ in U.S. seldomly reported

Ford sales fall 33.3% in the second quarter due to coronavirus

Manhattan apartment sales worst on record, biggest plunge in 30 years


In a clown world, anything can happen. We’re neither hot or cold, fast or slow, good or bad. We just coexist and coast higher on the never ending rollercoaster of RIGGED markets and toxic politics — divisive, cancerous, and demoralizing.

Imagine now investing in stocks?

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REELING FROM A HORRIBLE SET BACK IN STOCKS, losing 2% during today’s session, “The Fly” set out on a new journey to make it all back, and much much more. I tumbled through a wide array of charts and came up with the very best ones to own and then I bought them.

I expect to make a FULL RECOVERY tomorrow and will, assuredly, remind you of my fishing excellence at a time and place of my choosing.

Stocks closed at record highs, with a bit of a fade, yada yada yada.

Trump wants to send us all MOAR money because why the fuck not? This country is seriously fucked and toasted in the brain. There is nothing left but the remnants of a former great society.

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Remember when I said I could not lose money — with my big fucking smug mouth? Well, TADA!

Have a look at today’s booked trades — absolutely drugged (no vaccine).

(CPSH -14.3%)
(EKSO -12%)
(OSUR -7.7%)
(DIN -4.7%)
CODX -wash
IMAX -wash
CPRI +1.3%
AHPI +1.1%

We were supposed to go up and this was not supposed to happen, but it did. Admittedly, the CPSH pick is much worse for those following me — since some bought it in the AHs after he ran higher and now we’re all BOGGED the fuck out — crying in the streets without a pan to piss in. Fortunately for me, I am a rich man — fat in the wallet and generally a learned man around town. I can recover from this DISASTER inside of 10 mins flat. I can go out there today with the tools you have and make myself $15,000.

Can you?

Can you?

First order of business is to win on a single trade. It has to be the best trade, not the one that makes the most money, but the best. Also, it needs to be dramatic. If I made a little money in PFE — that would do nothing for my now SHATTERED confidence. I need something bold — but also distinguished. My position sizes are never more than 5%, unless I am drunk and/or averaging down — which is a rare occurrence.

The Nasdaq is +65 — because Pfizer has tricks up their sleeves. I will of course NOT be taking the COVID-19 death-ray vaccine and would prefer to die a horrible death instead.

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If you ever wanted to know what it was like to trade after the 1987 crash, you’ve done it now. The Dow ran up a remarkable 18% for the quarter, whilst the Nasdaq charged ahead by 30%. You know the winners and the demeanor of this tape, highlighted by Robinhood traders laughing at bankruptcy filings and buying XYZ because the stock is supposed to trade to zero.

There is immense liquidity in this market now and retail is back, people trading this market like there’s no tomorrow. All of this makes for a fun tape, not necessarily a healthy one. Valuations, by any measure, far exceeds anything we’ve seen in over a decade — at least. Yet, the Fed is still out there providing liquidity, increasing their balance sheet to more than $7 trillion amidst cities on fire and pandemic lock-downs.

We were not supposed to V-shape rally, but we did and now everyone wants to know how the story ends. Do we continue higher, in a seamless and endless rally in stocks based upon the caprices of ignorant people? Or will we revert to the mean and CRASH THIS FUCKER into the ground?

I bought a bunch of shit today, trying to lose money. I’ve been trying to lose money all quarter, but can’t seem to find my groove. Every time I book a loss I think to myself “maybe now I can finally put myself out of my misery and end it all” and then BAM! I fucking explode with a string of 30 winners in a row. I try very hard to lose money — but sadly I fail time in and time again.

If you’re wondering if Le Fly is the real deal — join us in Exodus and see for yourself. I hold no punches and will challenge any one of you FUCKERS to a trading contest — whenever the hell you’re ready for it.

Ciao and Au revoir.

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Dealing with Squandered Opportunity

The worst feeling in the world is the sense of regret or missing out on something that was built for you to be divine. I can recall innumerable instances when I looked back upon a moment and said to myself “I should’ve done this.” Alas, these moments in our lives repeat themselves over and over until we’re good and dead.

Some people learn faster than others. There are some 20 year olds out there who are wiser than 50 year olds, due to good breeding. And of course there are the majority of people at or below the IQ bell curve who just react to stimuli and have no bearing of right from wrong, just pain and pleasure.

For me, I underwent a micro-event trading BYFC. At around 7:50am I saw that Netflix was going to deposit $100m into black owned banks and felt I had a clear advantage over my peers who didn’t know the only two publicly traded black banks: CARV and BYFC. I got filled at $2, announced it in Exodus, and soon the stock raced past $3.30, placing my unrealized gain at 65%.

But because it happened so fast and all of the FUCKERS in Exodus were taking profits and jerking off to their gains, I felt I knew more again and would resist the temptation to book the obvious sale.

WRONG, fucked for face.

I just sold out for a 12% gain, after watching it all day, paralyzed by the deadness of the stock — waiting for my feeeeeeeelings to be assuaged.

I sold because the move was dead and also because it literally paralyzed me. If you’re stuck watching one stock all day long, it’s either too big a position or too risky a stock, so sell it.

This is the primary reason why I’m so keen on overnight trades. You get in after 3pm and sell the next morning.

There will be other BYFC’s and perhaps the next time I will sell when I am supposed to sell. No promises!

My booked trades for the day, thus far.

IDEX +13.8%
(SOXS -9.7%)
JNUG +8.4%
OPK +12.7%
(AHT -7.2%)
RPAI +8%
(BCRX -2.7%)
BYFC +12%

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