18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
19,437 Blog Posts

Back From a Long Day of Hiding Out

At around 10am I was alerted to a Showing Time request for my house at 2pm. This set off loud and buzzing alarms inside House Fly, as Mrs Fly panicked to launder the sheets and scrub the walls and make sure everything was tidy enough to be seen by complete strangers, perusing our home with extreme criticism and sincere circumspection — for the purposes of purchase. A domino of mental confusion gripped her and caused an avalanche of emotions to sloppily spill out and erupt into an inferno of rage and anger. Much to her chagrin, I opted to shower and then garden — taking the highest road if you will — because gentlemen of my cloth and leisure do not partake in “inconsequential discussions.” Catch phrases such as that, I’ve learned, work wonders for my relationship — a toxic recipe of self-destruction brought on by the fact that I’m constantly seeking chaos and interminable folly.

I made good solid coin today and have come back home for a brief period of rest and respite. I will soon be on the road again, acting as a butler for House Fly, doing this and that, getting things done productively and without complaint. The markets enjoy going higher and I am in no position to argue with it. It was tempting to fade the rally for an opening tick lower — but I decided that would be a dogs shit trade and opted for something more degenerate. The IPO market is red hot.

Trade accordingly.

Here are my last trades, most of which were overnight holds.

DRIP +28%
ROKU +2.5%
TVIX +5.7%
TZA +2%
FAZ +6%
TQQQ +4.5%
NUGT +21%
ROKU +6.4%
(DUST -2.9%)
AYX +5.4%
ZM +8.5%
PINS +9.5%
(PAGS -0.5%)
(SFIX -3.5%)
FAS +0.3%
(BE -3.1%)
LK +8.1%
CRWD +7.2%
SOLY +7.9%
NUGT +8.3%
SAIL +5.9%

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Trump Tweet Sends Markets Flying; Schiff Salt is Real

I’ve stopped expecting things from people a long time ago. I just resign myself to destiny now, toiling away, scrubbing the decks and firing the cannons indiscriminately into enemy quarters.

This Trump tweet about meeting President Xi is lighting markets on fire, and also Peter Schiff’s head.

This is all so stupid — but you cannot hate the players — just the game.

Separately, and I know some of you FUCKERS love this — I just kicked out my overnight trades CRWD and SOLY for +7.2% and +7.9%, respectively. Also, I sold NUGT and SAIL for a quick +8.3% and +5.9%, respectively. Fly’s high IQ trades are for Exodus members only, so sorry.

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European Bond Yields Plunge Into Negative Territory

We are in an unprecedented time of easy money. We can easily see this by looking at the 10yr benchmark around the world, many of which in Europe are NEGATIVE yielding.

Here’s a list of countries with negative 10yr bonds yields in Europe.

Austria (-0.04%)
Denmark (-0.27%)
Finland (-0.02%)
France (0.00%)
Germany (-0.32%)
Netherlands (-0.16%)
Sweden (-0.013%)
Switzerland (-0.536%)

Comparatively, the US 10yr is a very attractive 2.01%

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Bonds Yields Crater and Crack — Markets Surge

Over in Europe, men in tight pants are buying stocks furiously. The DAX and CAC are up greater than 1.5%. Here in the state, the Dow is looking to soar by 150, Nasdaq by 85. The news is curiously absent from the tape. I did see this — some fuck over at Carlyle speculating like a motherfucker.

“I do think there will be a resolution before the end of the year” in the U.S.-China trade war, says private equity billionaire David Rubenstein.

Rubenstein says he’s spoken to U.S. and Chinese officials. “My view is both sides want a deal.”

President Trump and Chinese President Xi Jinping will meet at the G-20 summit later this month, Rubenstein predicts.

But the important thing happening this morning is in the bond markets. Listen to me and look at me — these fucking yields, god damn it, are out of control to the downside. People are plunging into bonds like it was the end of days.

Right now the 10yr is at 2.02%, down more than 6 basis points. The 30yr is at 2.51%, placing 30yr mortgages sharply under 4%. The cost of capital is now cheapest in years, happening at a time when the economy is great. So, and this goes without saying, the perception is this will be inflationary. We haven’t tried lowering rates while the economy was ripping. Maybe this does the trick!

As such, gold is rocking higher — now up 0.8% to 1,353.

Lastly, fake meat is above $200.

Happy trading.

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Booked a Fast Profit on Chinese Coffee

Silly jackasses — the Chinese do not drink coffee. They drink green tea and eat red bean paste for breakfast, sandwiched in between two greasy prices of dough. With that being said, I booked an 8% overnight gain in LK.

Who’s gonna stop me?

Here are my last 15 overnight trades.

DRIP +28%
ROKU +2.5%
TVIX +5.7%
TZA +2%
FAZ +6%
TQQQ +4.5%
NUGT +21%
ROKU +6.4%
DUST -2.9%
AYX +5.4%
ZM +8.5%
PINS +9.5%
PAGS -0.5%
SFIX -3.5%
FAS +0.3%
BE -3.1%
LK +8.1%

Life is good and it’s gonna stay that way. I took out two overnight trades today, and I’d tell you, I really would — but they’re for members only. So sorry — fucked faces.

I have nothing bad to say about stocks; therefore, I do not have much to say at all.

Good day.

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Kostin is Not Goldman; Kostin is Persona Non Grata

This article is intended to help young investors fetter out the bullshit they see and hear about Wall Street.

Here is the headline on CNBC now.

Listen to me, David Kostin is a fucking bearBOT program at Goldman, used as a foil for misdirection — tricking the plebs into vomiting up their shares, all the way the Goldman trading desk sops it up for profit. You cannot equate Kostin with the true sentiments of the bank, regardless of his haughty title at the firm.

Here are some note on today’s BEARSHITTER call by KostinBOT

The valuation for growth stocks is high and software in particular now carries the highest multiples since the Tech Bubble, Goldman said.

“Rising market concentration and the political landscape suggest that regulatory risk will persist and could eventually weigh on company fundamentals,” said David Kostin, Goldman’s chief U.S. equity strategist.

For investors still want to bet on growth stocks, Goldman came up with a list of names, including Lululemon Athletica and Advanced Micro Devices, with strong growth and high margins but less risk from regulation and high valuations.

He’s retarded, trust me. I’ve been fooled about a dozen times by him — thinking he had some unique insight into the economy because of the firm he worked for and its resources. NOPE. He doesn’t know a damn thing.

So whenever you see something from Goldman, signed by David Kostin, I want you to take it throw it directly into the trash can — for it is entirely useless and probably wrong on purpose just to trick you into making bad choices.

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Heavily Long Olde Man Stocks Into the Summer Doldrums

I’m not bearish, per se — but I definitely don’t think we have large dicked gains ahead of us. As a matter of fact, if I woke up to the market down 900 points, based off some trade war bullshit news, I wouldn’t be surprised. I don’t awaken from my slumber with the idea of stocks being so undervalued that I must convert into a foaming mouthed bull-tard moron. No, I simply play the tape for what it is, with a deep under-current of extreme hatred not too much beneath the bubbly exterior (this is me being bubbly).

I have a shotgun to the face pick and I really want to give it to you now — but I won’t. Is that fucked up or not? I’ve been giving free stocks picks on the site since 2008 and I think in many ways it has cheapened the quality of said picks. For example, my recent foray into the market, previous 17 picks or so, would’ve netted someone upwards of 90%, had they gone all in on each pick. Do I brag endlessly about this and discuss my “high IQ” stocks advice as being something of an unbelievably gift to the readership? No, I never do that. But heading into the relaunch of Exodus 2.0, as we are in the process of totally rewriting the platform, I think it’s appropriate for me to truly give something back to the good folks who are members of Exodus 1.0, in the form of my undivided devotion to the platform.

For the time being, the picks stay inside of the walled gardens.

Markets look strong early going — gold is weak, however, as well as crude. For the bulls to get an erection, we’ll need bond yields to spike. I don’t see that happening. Ergo, I am long a sundry, mind you, of value stocks aka olde man stocks — eagerly awaiting for that exuberance to wear off.

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Happy Father’s Day Lads!

Being a Mother is easy. All you have to do is carry the child for a few months, deliver it, and then make the child sandwiches for the next 18+ years. But being a Dad, a good Dad, takes skill.

Who else will give Junior his first lesson into how to formally tighten a fist and punch some other boy in the nose with it?

Who else will tell him not to cry, that ‘crying is for babies’ and true men, real men, rage out and hit the ball over the fence after striking out the first three times at bat?

Who’s gonna introduce him to his first beer, or tobacco product, or show him how to eat fatty meats?

Who else, dare I say, will give him his first motorcycle and watch war movies with him — showing him how other Dads raised other boys to grow up to shoot people into the face with bullets, for love of God and country?

On this fine Father’s Day I wish all of the true Dads a good great day. The weather here in the northeast corridor of the United States is splendid. Have the wife scramble up some eggs for you and heat up some coffee, and maybe a slab or two of bacon. Why not? Who’s gonna stop you — the doctor? Pfffff.

Head outside and toss the ball around with Junior. After he complains about how boring it all is, head on out to the lake and fish, smoke a powerful cigar, and eat sandwiches with heavily salted meat inside of it. Maybe after that, you can go to the gym to deadlift 315lbs ten times. Let’s see the mothers do that, huh?

See, being a Dad is all about balance — knowing when to tell Junior about the birds and the bees, offering life advice as it pertains to fixing things with a wrench or how to comport oneself as a proper gentleman, in all of its eloquence and grandeur. Some of us grew up without Dads, for whatever reason, so we learned how to become one by watching Saving Private Ryan, or other shows about Fatherhood, such as Red Dawn and 300.

Ah, I can smell the bacon sizzling now. There’s gonna be a heck of a mess in the kitchen this morning — I’ll tell you that much. And guess what? Life keeps getting better. You’re not gonna have to lift a finger — because it’s Father’s Day and everyone else is your servant, so take advantage of it and order a milkshake with extra cream, or maybe have the wife iron your clothes an extra time — just for good measure.

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The Exodus oversold signal for the overall market closed out its 10 day cycle today, which started on 5/31/19. The net result was a 5.5% win for the SPY. The importance of this test cannot be minimized. These algorithms are malleable and learn markets as we go. Because of the massive draw down in late 2018, the algos adjusted the stress levels to conform with the pain endured during that time.

This test was at those low reading and it nailed the market to the exact day.

Unfortunately, we are not doing free trials at Exodus anymore — due to wanton theft and grifting from you, the ungrateful reader class pleb. If you want access, invest a small sum of money into your craft and envelope yourselves in the bosom of winship.


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Slow Day — Markets Refuse to Go Lower

Big opportunity lost for shorts today. It’s a Friday and war with Iran is imminent. All sorts of red flags went up due to the bond market and Morgan Stanley’s economic indicator casting a grave pall upon the forecast of this economy — and yet we could not even drop by 1%. What a shameful disappointment.

I will have you know, I have zero hedges and considerable long exposure, but in old man value names, hardly any great. I own some of course — but the majority of my bounty is conservative — because lower yields is a boon for high divvy plays.

Not much else to say other than ‘watch gold.’ The strong dollar derailed it of glory today, but there’s always tomorrow.

With that feather in my cap, I bid you a good weekend.

NOTE: Please say a prayer for an expeditious sale of my house, so that I might become a southern gent, post haste.

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