Reminder: Don’t Chase Oil Stocks

Yes indeed, there will be blood. It will flow freely from your head if you continue to buy oil stocks into momentum. They are, for now, purely designed to fuck with people — mean reversion tools of destruction.

Today, for no good reason, a slew of oil stocks are up 10%, including OAS, BBG, WTI, NGL, ECR, CRZO, EMES, SDRL.

Are we seriously going to do this to ourselves? Let me be explicit: oil isn’t going higher you fucking assholes. Do you know how I know this?

History is on my side, dating back thirty years.

If you want to buy oil, do it during Xmas time, heading into 2018. What you’re doing now is wasting valuable time and resources in a sector that is bound to beat your ass until your bones break.

Look what I’m doing, jogging on with leisure, making all sorts of easy money in XIV.

What the fuck are you doing with your lives?

This is such a multi-tiered story of fuckery of the very first order — I had to buy this stock, if only for its novelty qualities.

Pricing wise, their products are considered mid to high end, affordable for folks with money, way the fuck out of wack for those living on a fixed income.

We like to see that in a retailer? Why? Because it’s aspirational. Like another Canadian bullshit retailer, LULU, this product will become desired by American shopping mall savages.

Secondly, they literally kill animals to make their products.

This is from their website, describing their policy for skinning coyote’s for their coats.

We only use the best quality fur from the Northwest regions of Canada and the United States, where coyote populations are confirmed to be highly abundant. In fact, in many regions of North America, coyotes are considered a pest as they attack livestock, endangered prey species, pets and sometimes even people. We know that wearing fur is a personal choice and we respect that. In turn, we hope that people will respect our responsible use and ethical sourcing of fur.

LOL, did you fucking read that?

If you’re interested in the step by step process of how Canada Goose traps, kills, and skins coyotes, read PETAs blog on it.

These are some dark motherfuckers. We like that. Why? Because the dark always wins.

Share price wise, it’s off the 52 week high list, but has been trending towards it. You can tell this is going to be the hot retailer this Xmas, typically of Canada to supplant good olde fashioned Mexican made American clothes.

Angry short seller

I’ll bet your fucking balls this stock hits new highs inside of the next month.

Here’s the latest research note I have on it.

Canaccord Genuity reiterates GOOS with a Buy and raises tgt to GOOS.TO (currently CAD23.66 +0.36) to CAD34 from CAD33 . GOOS reported solid FQ1 results in which both sales and EPS (-13c vs. our -20c est.) handily beat our and consensus estimates. Total revenue grew 80% vs. our flat estimate due to (1) a pull forward of wholesale deliveries of $5.1M and (2) strong DTC growth of 559%. Robust gross margin expansion of +1700bps benefited from both its two retail stores and solid e-commerce growth. While the company did not raise guidance as its policy is to only raise it annually, we firmly believe the traction seen in Q1 is a harbinger for a solid fall/winter selling season.

My unchecked hatred for the banks has little to do with the current state of the market, but the fundamentals of the banking system, as defined by the yield curve.

What is the yield curve?

In short, for you newfags, it is the spread between the 2y and 10y govt bonds. After Trump stole the election, the spread blew out, which caused banks to rally by 30%. Since then, helped along with Fed tightening, that spread has shrunk.

It’s a real risk and the best predictor of recession we’ve got.

UBS: "Recession odds low, but wages and yield curve raise risks in 2018-19"

— zerohedge (@zerohedge) September 13, 2017

As you read this, the 2y is 1.35% and the 10y is 2.188%, equaling a spread of 84bps.

The important feature of this spread is the fact it is flattening, indicative of trouble ahead. Plus, the tighter the spread gets, the less money banks make.

The banks are barely down today and there isn’t a sense of urgency to short them, unless of course you believe the spread will continue to tighten, causing this narrative to spill out into the public conscious. If and when it does, you will be thanking me for tossing you into the FAZmobile for a spin around Wall.

I’ve looked at DLB from afar. Years ago, I admired how well the stock did — but never bought any. Now the stock is in play again, this time because the new iPhone and the Apple TV 4k will include their tech.

Shares are barreling higher on the news.

Both products will include ‘Dolby Vision’, helping produce high resolution content.

Analysts at Piper Jaffray called Apple’s shout-outs “significant wins” for Dolby.

“The stock reacted favorably on the news and rightfully so,” JPMorgan’s Paul Coster wrote in a research note. “Apple’s adoption of Vision on mobile may entice other [manufacturers] to follow suit.”

In case you’re eyeballing the stock, wondering if you missed the boat — not at all. The shares are still cheap, on a historical basis.

I’m spent with the political narratives. It’s not that I’ve had a change of heart about fomenting massive levels of tumult and anarchy in America — but because I’m a bit bored. I took a 12 month jaunt into the swamp and came out the other end snoring. I won’t ban political posts just yet, or cast aside the divisive cocksuckers in the comments section just yet — but we’re getting there.

I’ve been bitten by the trading bug again and intend to dedicate gobs of time finding small locales of degeneracy from which I can draw inspiration and really fuck up the competition. Additionally, I’ll be managing money, professionally again, unlike you larping vegemite eating losers, sometime in the not-too-distant future.

Life as a professional blogger was fantastic — but “The Fly” has nations to punish and Orbital Space Cannons (OSC) to complete. Believe me (extra Orange Gorilla), it was a nice run exposing John Podesta’s sordid affinity for pizza and the great crimes of Barry Obama — but it’s time that I moved onto something more meaningful. After all, I never had an interest in ‘saving’ the country, no more than Bane intended to save Gotham and give it back to the people.

Snack time these days, as a vegan, consists of grass fed broccoli spears, tomatoes and sprigs of herbs, atop large pieces of bread, olive oil and a fuckload of potatoes. I will, undoubtedly, become a fat vegan asshole with this diet. As we speak, I’m listening to this lunatic song on loop with a pumpkin waffle and half bag of frenched fries in the oven.

You don’t know anyone like me — you never will.

At any rate, futures look like giant nothing burgers on a hot vegan grill tonight. We’ll be banking some MOAR coin in XIV tomorrow, like wild animals, whether you like it or not. Believe me (extra pussy grabber), I see you faggots shit talking in OA’s comments section. I will have your head severed and mounted atop my cauliflower crops.

Nite.

For $1,000, you can own a device that will take your ugly face and transform it into a literal pile of talking shit, to send to your friends and colleagues via text messaging.

Here was the grande unveiling.

Who wants in? You can become the pile of shit you’ve always wanted to become. How about that for setting the bar low?

Apple can fuck themselves pic.twitter.com/1RWYcqCV83

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) September 12, 2017

How will you cryptofags recover from these comments, a stinging assessment of your primary source of wealth: FRAUD. Earlier today, Dimon said Bitcoins were a fraud and was nothing more than a redux of the tulip bubble. This afternoon, he doubled down on those comments and said it was only a matter of time before government took notice of Bitcoins and shut that shit down.

Imagine this: you’re there in your pleather chair, buying and selling cryptos, content with your illicit gains in today’s modern day tulip craze. Nature calls and you visit the lavatory to defecate inside of your Home Depot tier Kohler bowl. You get back to the chair and see your accounts have been frozen — because the Federal Reserve, in conjunction with all central banks around the world, that bitcoins were illegal and shut down under AML laws.

Your accounts are zero, dreams dashed, Bernanke wins again.

DIMON: GOVERNMENT WILL SHUT DOWN BITCOIN pic.twitter.com/4l55d1a4qb

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) September 12, 2017

Bitcoins are down a staggering 1.4% on this newz.

People are making a big deal because the top banker in the world said his biggest nemesis, Bitcoin, was a fraud. While I do agree with him, these statements are on par with a Police Commissioner bad mouthing a cop killer.

The world of cryptocurrency is bigger than bitcoins now. The blockchain, if successful, will replace investment banks and crush their free cash flow models.

On this news, BTC has dropped by 2.6%. Big deal.

DIMON: BITCOIN IS A “FRAUD”; “WORSE THAN TULIP BULBS”
DIMON: BITCOIN WILL EVENTUALLY BLOW UP
DIMON: BITCOIN WON’T END WELL
DIMON: WOULD FIRE ANY TRADER TRADING BITCOIN FOR BEING STUPID

UPDATE: Apple iPhone X starts at $999; pre-order Oct 27, ships Nov 3 

UPDATE: Stupidly, Apple unveiled the iPhone 10 today, apparently skipping over 9. This is inane on a multitude of levels. The worst is they’re hyping a product that isn’t being retailed soon. In other words, why upgrade to an 8 when the 10 is so fucking awesome? If I owned AAPL, I’d sell it now.

WATCH: “Your iPhone is locked until you look at it, and it recognizes you.”

Apple unveils Face ID for the iPhone X https://t.co/4k1rN31BDe

— NBC News (@NBCNews) September 12, 2017

Now all of you Dick Tracyphiles can really make believe you’re cracking cases, while talking into your watch. The new iWatch will be untethered to the iPhone — which is likely to drive sales for the product. I believe the iWatch makes up around 2-3% of overall sales for Apple, so this is a big deal.

Source: CNBC

Apple said Bluetooth and Wi-Fi are 50 percent more efficient, to help save on battery life, and there’s a new barometric sensor for better detecting flights of stairs. Apple used the display of the Apple Watch to serve as an antenna.

During the announcement, Apple CEO Tim Cook said that the Apple Watch is now the No. 1 watch in the world, ahead of even the most popular traditional brands. Cook also said customer satisfaction is at 97 percent.

The new Apple Watches will launch with watchOS 4, the latest software, which includes new health tracking functions, Siri recommendations, new watch faces and more.

Apple said the Apple Watch is the most-used heart-tracker in the world and it will now notify users when it detects an elevated heart rate when a user isn’t active. It will, also listen to heart rhythm and will detect atrial fibrillation and alert a user if the heart rate starts to move into irregular rhythms. Data from the Apple Watch can be sent to a new Apple Watch Study that’s begin run in tandem with Stanford Medicine, as first reported by CNBC, which will launch later this year.

As for the iPhone 8, it looks just like the 7, just with faster chips, better camera — yada, yada, yada.

H/t: @jank0

iPhone 8 has new stereo speakers, 25% louder. New chip: A11 Bionic. 6-core CPU.
iPhone 8 will use first-ever Apple-designed GPU, 30% faster graphics performance. Should make a difference for ARKit.
“This glass is the most durable even in a smart phone.” 4.7″ display for iPhone 8, 5.5″ for 8 Plus.
The iPhone 8 12 MP camera has a single lens. Dual lens in 8 Plus.
“iPhone 8 has the highest-quality video capture ever in a smart phone.”
Wireless charing is coming to the iPhone 8.
iPhone 8 will start at $699 , iPhone 8 Plus at $799 . In stores September 22, iOS 11 is coming September 19.

The stock price has not faded after these announcements.

At CNBC’s Delivering Alpha conference, Blackstone’s CEO, Stephen Schwarzman told Michelle Caruso-Cabrera that after the Charlottesville mayhem, he received hundreds of defamatory emails, many calling him a ‘nazi’, borrowing the narrative of the far left group ANTIFA. This is especially absurd, since he’s jewish.

But don’t let logic get in the way of all that pent up anger and hatred.

Schwarzman on being called a nazi by idiots and why he decided to disband the business council with the President, saying the public discourse applied too much pressure on the CEOs in the group — making it untenable.

Blackstone's Schwarzman on being called a 'nazi' by idiots. pic.twitter.com/KqKN7qIsuU

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) September 12, 2017

Bonus: The NY Times published fake news on his reaction to Trump’s comments following Charlottesville.

Blackstone's Schwarzman on the 'Failing NY Times' publishing fake news. pic.twitter.com/R1c5rpBn3f

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) September 12, 2017