iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
16,724 Blog Posts

NEW FEATURE FOR APPLE X: BECOME A LITERAL PILE OF TALKING SHIT

For $1,000, you can own a device that will take your ugly face and transform it into a literal pile of talking shit, to send to your friends and colleagues via text messaging.

Here was the grande unveiling.

Who wants in? You can become the pile of shit you’ve always wanted to become. How about that for setting the bar low?

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17 comments

  1. clock

    Guy on one of the channels today said you could get one of the phones that does everything Apple phone does for HALF the price….anybody know which one that is???

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  2. stries

    Angry

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  3. venter

    You already have a whole bunch of talking pieces of shit running your country at every level of gov’t, all over the corporate world, in the FED and of course the entire military/industrial complex.

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  4. thegametheorist

    Hahahahaha I knew this post was coming

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  5. it is showtime

    This should have been post # 16666

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  6. sarcrilege

    NSA/CIA must be orgasmic.

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  7. acehood

    Fly you spend $50k per annum on caged free, grass fed broccoli and you’re making fun of spending a fraction of that on a device that most people find indispensable on a daily basis?

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  8. bob smith

    My $20 smart phone is just as functional to me as the new iphone.

    Of course I don’t send poopy faces to people so there’s that.

    That icrap app speaks volumes about the intelligence of anyone eager to fork out $1000 for a phone.

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  9. J Adabese (your pen pal)
    J Adabese (your pen pal)

    Perfect for John Lee who talks more bullshit than any human being.

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  10. moonshot

    Millions will buy it.

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    • dawg

      Yes…. One must know that an iPhone is a status symbol…. Much like a Mercedes Benz( Fly?) vs. a Ford Taurus. They both get the job done…. Love my android, however The Mrs.and my daughters don’t get it and I’ll buy a few of these new gay and “shitty” phones. Go figure

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    • moosh

      And if they didn’t have the $999 it took, they’d be the everyday lotto playing type of millions buying retarded bullshit anyways

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  11. awanka

    Hidy Ho!

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  12. awanka

    Ah, Mr. Fly. I was so certain Apple would win you back with their animated emoji.

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