The consumer is alive and well and purchasing American automobiles.

According to a Bloomberg report, auto sales are on pace for their best year in a decade or more. They attribute the success to job growth, available credit, affordable fuel, and aging models.

Great news for the Motor City, but investors are more likely to react to earnings this afternoon from Tesla Motors. The hybrid battery, tech, and major automotive manufacturer is set to report after the bell today. Analysts estimate the Palo Alto native will post a quarterly loss at $0.50 per share on revenue of $1.26 billion.

Ford and GM are not trading stocks. They are old man investor stocks. Tesla has mania momentum and the keys to the future.

I am in an aging Ford and intend to keep her running until Tesla unveils their Model III. Hopefully my Focus survives the wait list duration too. Otherwise I will be Uber dependent because I am done driving an Industrial Age combustion engine.

That is how long it takes, according to WSJ, to take ownership of the Tesla Model X. In the meantime, why not make a baby?

If waiting almost an entire year to buy a car is not your style, there are several alternative manufacturers who would happily fulfill your order sooner. The problem is you will have to drive a non-Tesla which will suck. You will have to buy it from a dealership and be subjected to those physiologically manipulative charlatans. Or you can just wait.

Waiting sounds like the lesser of two evils. In a nation built around the car, your best hope is for Elon to build an electric car that does not suck and drives itself. Otherwise our fates are subject to the caprices of Saudi Arabian Princes and their face-fart fetishes.

Note: Tesla reports their third quarter earnings tomorrow, November 3^rd after the bell.  

Adult nightmares are horrible.  One time I woke up in tears after a dream where I could not make the dryer work.  These are my first world terrors.

The following charts are the stuff of night terror.  Some are big earnings gaps, others are wretched 2015 losers.  Topping the list is the devil himself, Valeant.  These investors are the poor souls who realized they are holding the next Enron, yikes!

Per the $IBB, the biotech industry just responded to the first level I was watching for sellers.  Now I am sitting here considering the short.  There is an old axiom I hold dear however, which states, everyone always shorts the first rip too soon.  Plus, this is just a fib retracement level–not a real level…if such thing exists.  Check it:

Either I miss a solid entry here or I avoid taking heat when we ‘check back’ to the Hillary tweet which is my conviction level.  Either way biotech is the best short opportunity I see in the market right now.

You may have noticed an absence of Twitter commentary from me yesterday. You may have thought, “That is odd, isn’t it a top three holding for this Raul fella?”

I was angry, not because the stock was down but, because men took to their podium (via the Twitter platform, of course) and said stupid things. They said things that were detrimental to the investor class. They were detrimental because they came from a position of perceived authority. Fodder like this, from a BLUE CHECK-MARKED PUNK:

TWTR is crashing.

— Jay Yarow (@jyarow) October 27, 2015

I have been looking for a reason to unfollow this miscreant for months. I am a patient man, gagging on information at times to test my stoic grit, but knowing wholeheartedly that some people have detrimental life intent.

I did not heroically add Twitter shares this morning. The position is already an oversize ‘ticket out the ghetto’ long. However, and let this echo across the northern hemisphere, I am extremely optimistic about Moments, Periscope, and all other things of the Twitter variety.

It is the best. It will always be the best, thing, ever.  Now leave me to my ritualistic FOMC preparations.

Shares of flailing social media experiment Yelp have been up as much as 8% this morning after PC Magazine reported Amazon now includes Yelp results in Echo.  Echo is the cylindrical robot-speaker-thing that Amazon is using to physically infiltrate the home.

Keep an eye on how investors treat this spike in share price ahead of Yelp earnings, set for release October 28^th after market close.  My primary expectation is many will use this lift as an opportunity to cash out—so expect a fade.

I still like Yelp.  I used it this weekend to find coffee and food.  It is indispensable for me, especially when travelling.  But the stock has been a relentless murder hole.

The entire fate of our tech rally lies in the hands of Facebook.  Do you think I am fucking with you?

I have seen this chart pattern do horrible things in my short tenure as a trader.  It’s still early, but we have the makings of a failed auction in the FB market.

A failed auction takes place when price exceeds a prior swing, briefly, then has a fast reversal in the opposite direction.  To be a true failed auction you need to see fast confirmation away from the area.

That is what I will be on the lookout for tomorrow.

In the meantime, and in the spirit of calling the market bluff’s bluff, I bought some LNKD calls.

These will only last as long as Facebook stock negates these early failed auction signs.  If not, I will cut LNKD and MOAR as I feel this wet blanket action could be a fire retardant to the entire tech sector.

Let’s not even mention the drubbing at Tesla.  Ah, I just did, drats!

Oprah doesn’t care if you think Weight Watches stock is overreacting to hear beaming endorsement. Oprah can squash your entire account with her thumb and index finger.

If you think, for one minute, the marketing opportunities of the ‘O’ are not delicious, intoxicating, and viral, then you obviously aren’t an avid Oxygen Media watcher.

Step up, plebeian bear shitter, and let Oprah decimate your portfolio. Fall to the siege of Oprah like the millions who came before you.

Shares of the odd, AA like institution Weight Watchers International are soaring pre-market after Oprah announced she took a 10% stake in the company.

The media titan declared her agreement to hold the shares for no less than five years, a vote of confidence from one of the most influential people in the world.

This may become a new trend—billionaire endorsements. Who needs corporate buybacks? Last week Ballmer buyers Twitter, this week Oprah buys Weight Watchers, what’s next week? Giorgio Armani buys Crocs?

Anyhow, let’s look back on when Tom Cruise went full Scientology on Oprah’s couch:

Fellow Detroit native and owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, Steve Ballmer announced today his 5% stake in Twitter.   How did he break the news? VIA TWITTER, HOW ELSE DO PROS COMMUNICATE? Hand signals?

Good job @twitter,@twittermoments innovation, @jack Ceo, leaner, more focused. Glad I bought 4% past few months. Like @alwaleedbinT move too

— Steve Ballmer (@Steven_Ballmer) October 16, 2015

Here’s what you need to know: Twitter is the best mode of communication. If it has one adversary, it is SnapChat. Look for more princes, kings, and capitalist billionaires to clamor for a piece of the champion.

FD: Twitter is my largest investment. Twitter is my ticket out the ghetto.

For a minute, the media thought his account was hacked, mainly because of how odd that tweet looks.  But apparently Bloomberg Bussiness got him on the horn and confirmed the news.

Social media is catching a bid across the board on the news.