I’ve been reading a lot of bullshit about the record spread between WTI and Brent crude. Even though the spread widened significantly during the Egyptian revolution, some fucktards think WTI should be shit upon and no longer taken seriously. I want some of you big hat wearing, Texas motherfuckers, to opine on this matter, as it may have massive implications for investing in oil stocks. Basically, some are blaming the emergence of new tar sands crude coming on line in Alberta, Canada, for flooding the storage tanks in Oklahoma via homo-pipeline. In other words, Brent is a better representation of global crude demand, while WTI is just American stockpiles. I have a hard time believing this theory, mainly because WTI has always been the defacto standard for global demand.
In case you were wondering why iBankCoin was down earlier, the answer is simple: we were doing field tests for our new internet laser beams. I’ve developed new offensive weapons that instantly track who is reading iBC and makes it possible to annihilate said hard drives upon a press of a singular button. In layman’s terms, watch your fucking mustache.
As an aside, I fired three clients last week for annoying me. I really do not like clients: inherently, they are stupid ingrates. I haven’t accepted a new client, aside from this big oil exec last year, for several years. I get offers on a daily basis but regularly tell people “fuck off, I have my own money.” Back in the old days, I’d clamor for the opportunity to accept a million here or a milli there. However, back then is not now and right now I don’t give a shit.
I am sure you are reading this scripture and hoping for some stock ideas. Well, you will be gravely disappointed, as I am not in the mood to help out small plebs. In this day and age, “The Fly” is into decadent/obscure shit, like eating alligators or dinosaur eggs. I don’t have time for this internet shit.
Having said that, you fuckers have less than one week to join the 3rd Annual iBC March Madness contest. It’s open to The PPT members only, due to the cash prize of $1,000 being allotted to the lucky fucking winner. Thus far, we have about 100+ sign ups. I anticipate about 400-500 sign ups by week’s end.
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