iBankCoin
Home / Dr. Fly

Dr. Fly

18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.

PLAYING TONIGHT’S DEBATES VIA THE FUCKING STOCK MARKET

Trump is going to unveil his 20x platinum black power package worth a gazillion dollars, which will only be topped by Biden’s 40x platinum package. Biden will then delve into EV and talk shit about the environment, which will be viewed indifferently by Trump — who will then shill for more tax cuts.

Tonight’s debates will be one giant fucking handout for all people of all colors. Free shit up and down the aisle. I am long lithium because they propel the EV sector and I am long two BLM stocks — because black power.

I see very few circumstances where this doesn’t happen. I am almost assured to make grandiose coin tomorrow, so stay tuned.

For the day, I closed +0.4%, a little disappointing since I had been up 1.3% earlier. I fucked my own face with several trades gone awry. My quant, however, which houses 50% of my account was +0.9%.

Bottom line: Extremest view here is for a TOTAL fucking collapse, in which case I am positioned for that eventuality as well. I quite literally cannot lose.

Comments »

HAVE FAITH IN THE COMING DOOM

En route to this wondrous place of black smoke and shards of metal will be sublime trading opportunities and of courser the typical Federal Reserve circle jerk. But as we enter the cooler climes and COVID-19 GAS MASKS are doled out to the public — rest assured collapse will come.

Even for you ANTI-MASKERS out there, the CORONAHOAX gentry, as yourselves — do you feel in charge?

If the end game of the “deep state” and the pan-global conspiracy to crash the economy and leave nothing left — how do you surmise you can stop it? Even if CORONAVIRUS was a 100% fraud — the outcome will still be the same.

Barreling into the month of October, I have sense irony around me, especially in front of the elections.

Presently 70%+ cash, 20% short via leveraged instruments — higher by 1% for the day.

Comments »

THE COLLAPSE IS COMING

It’s going to knock the wind out of your sails and crash your boat into the rocks. Most of you aren’t built for discomfort — grotesquely accustomed to SHIT-POSITING on Twitter funny images and cavorting with morons for the purposes of laughter. Those smiles will soon be turned upside down — as Mother Markets punches you square in the jaw with her iron fists.

We’re living in an era of extreme entitlement. Even during a complete economic lockdown — you fucking faggots enjoyed the grandeur of a bull market. These circumstances cannot last forever and I have never seen a more deserving group of people earn a market calamity.

It will be grim and force you out of stocks — cash calls and margin liquidations will be the new norm.

I cannot wait.

In the interim, I booked gains this morning in JMIA (+4.7%), BLNK (7.2%), and SRNE (+7.4%). I am 70% cash, 15% short — eagerly awaiting collapse.

Comments »

TRADING SHITCARS ALL DAY LONG

Hard not to be bullish after a +400 day. The news last night was Trump doesn’t pay taxes. The news today is Biden does not want to consent to a drug test, as per Trump’s request. I guess he knows Super Joe is on speed. What a fucking shit-show. I’d like to see the markets crash; but I never get what I want.

All day long, I was in and out of SHITCARS — trading a little of this and a little of that — all for +0.4% on trading and +1.1% for Quant. I got fucked in a BLM trade gone awry, -15% in BYFC in 30 seconds flat. That’s the life of a degenerate trader.

Today was a holy jewish holiday, so what you bore witness to today was GOYIM TRADING. If we trade down tomorrow, you know who did it.

I am fucking pissed off seeing FLUX +45% in the AHs. I was going to buy before the bell — but the volume was too thin.

I closed the session 50% cash, 15% hedged short.

Comments »

LET ME SHOW YOU MY CHARTS

See pal, last week I ran into a little snag during trading and ended up spinning my own wheels. On Friday I reversed said losses and embraced the BLACK POWER movement in America — fleecing shorts in a foray of BLM stocks. Today I was awakened to GRATUITOUS WINS.

I haven’t looked at a chart pal since 1976.

I buy what’s winning and only sell it when I am bored or tired of looking at it.

Let me show you some charts now.

DPHC +8.7%
XPEV +6.1%
SPAQ +5.9%
KCAC +5.6%
SABR +4.2%

Those are just some of the profits I took today, on this glorious autumn morning.

I am presently hedged and 60% cash, always on the prowl for new ideas. I look at 10,000 deals at day and choose 50.

Comments »

The Time Has Come to Ban Booze Again

Last year I gave up booze for a period of 6 months — mostly to prove to myself I could do it. It has a surprising effect on me — one that I truly enjoyed. No more hangovers. No more sojourns into the endless pits of COCKED TAILS and parading myself with martini glasses. None of that shit. I gave it up — hit the gym 4 days per week — and got very disciplined. My trading was never better and my fitness was on track to become great — but then COVID-19 hit and the son of a whore derailed my fitness efforts and everything has gone downhill, in that regard, since.

I started drinking, as promised, on the first day of summer and I must admit — NOT FEELING IT. I kind of miss the inane absurdity of living an austere lifestyle of temperance.

Last night I hopped on the fucking scale for the first time since April and I was shocked to find out I had gained 10lbs and now weigh 174. While this might be slim for many, or most, of you absolute fat fucks, “The Fly” cannot oblige. I refuse to slide down the path of sloth and sloppiness — carrying myself with disgrace down the boulevard with a protruding midriff over my Peter Millar slacks. Not going to happen.

So effective immediately, AUSTERE TIMES HAVE STRICKEN HOUSE FLY AGAIN.

Gone are the days of endless pasta bowls and sandwiches with brioche — or barreled ass panned cakes with an extra heaping of butter, swimming in mapled syrup. No more cakes, or puddings, or booze for that matter. Absolutely NOTHING at all — no carbs, no beers, no fun, no nothing.

My life will consist of gym, tennis, protein consumption, water, WHEY, study and sleep.

Comments »

During This State of Depravity and Wanton Excess, iBC Will Never Delve into Politics

About 4 years ago I steered this site, which was founded on tomfoolery and a diary to document my eccentricities, directly into the heart of Mount Doom and took up political discourse. At the time, I was rewarded with BIG DICKED page views. iBC’s Alexa ranking shot up from 75k to under 4k — posts emblazoned with fire got 500,000+ views and ad revenues shot higher in tow.

The subsequent result of all that is as follows:

  • A constant feeling of dread for taking up a discussion that divided people.
  • Stirring up emotions and making “enemies” out of people who I used to be friendly with.
  • Betraying the mantra of the site, pivoting directly into a poisonous bush of berries and eating them all.
  • Blacklisted on Twitter, banned on Facebook, Banned on Youtube — which resulted in loss of a decade’s worth of content, including Fly cartoon series, and of course google labeling the site as “dangerous” — banned from google ad words.

All of that was quite literally for nothing — since I really didn’t give a shit one way or another. I have no power over the results of any election and even if I did — with the two party system in place — is there really a fucking difference?

If you’re curious as to where the fuck people have gone on the site, as it once was a place brimming with bloggers (200+ at one time) and comment threads 200 deep; I have since halted all new bloggers to the site and restricted comments for new readers due to a spam situation that I will address when we redesign the site. Almost all of the commentary is now behind the gilded paywalls of Exodus, where the Pelican Room is active with discussions, everything but politics — which is banned there too.

All of my efforts are focused on two things now.

1. Completing and launching Stocklabs.
2. Completing and launching Stocklabs.

Third party ads have been removed from the site — because fuck them, and I blog a lot less than I used to — because I am trying to focus more on Completing and launching Stocklabs and also trading. I have never, in my whole life, traded more than I do now.  The reason why I do not post stock ideas here anymore is simply out of respect for people who pay for Exodus. I also realize some of you cannot or do not want to pay for Exodus and I am ok with that, at the moment. I will launch some free tools for you to enjoy once we complete SL.  One of them is out now — Stocklabs News.

If you want to support the site and its efforts to create the world’s first Orbital Space Cannon (OSC) to be used for offensive purposes only — you can purchase and read my two books — which will indoctrinate you into the House of Fly. Or, alternatively, you can get your iBC fall gear now — Country Club appropriate, and sport some of the finest fashions to ever come out from the internet.

One thing you will not get, which was the whole point of this fucking post, is divisive content that will piss you off. I am the only one that is allowed to hate here, mostly me against all of my unseen enemies attempting to capsize my warships. For example, last week I was distracted by a cadre of FUCKING MISFITS on Twitter with some inane poll. We got the war machine running hot and rigged the whole election. Whoever I wanted to win, won. Whoever I wanted to lose, lost. Just like in real politics. I even made myself lose because I quickly learned I hated all of those people and wanted them dead.

See “Veblen” entry in the previously hidden iBC Dictionary.

Off to the Grande Druid Lodge.

Comments »

BLM BAILS OUT LE FLY — TRADING LIKE A TRUE MASTER IS NOT ONLY A RIGHT, BUT A PASTIME

I was having a decent day in the markets. Recall, I have 50% of my money in the Exodus QUANT, which RAMPAGED THE FUCK HIGHER today for a substantial +4.2%. That pretty much negated yesterday’s losses — so fuck yourself.

Then late in the day, NEWS HIT THE TAPE, that Trump wanted to buy off Black Americans to the tune of $500b, in what he calls an investment in Black America. It is The Godfather of all gibs and that shit, mind you, made black owned businesses that publicly trade — RAMPAGE THE FUCK HIGHER.

Lucky for me, as you can see above, I have a BLM index in Stocklabs and 1,000 traders in the Pelican Room, an army if you will, at my disposal. We got in heavily into those fucking bastards and I fleeced the market for +16% in BYFC and +20% in UONEK and hold CARV into Monday’s jubilee.

In all, I finished the day +2.4% in my trading, +4.2% in my Quant. In other words, Le Fly is entirely back and yesterday’s foray into misery, which with the benefit of hindsight, was nothing more than a way station to greater and much greener pastures.

Have yourselves a fruitful weekend, you fucking faggots. Off to drink some champagne.

Comments »

Back to Trading Again; Nothing Will Ever Stop Me

Not even death. I’ve built Exodus and soon to be Stocklabs to survive my demise. It will trade long after I am dead. I’ve even made arrangements to replace myself, “The Fly”, with a successor who will carry the mantle of Le Fly 30-50 years after I am dead, to bring fruitful commentary and trades to a new generation of degenerate speculators.

As soon as I penned my last post, talking about how I would not buy stocks today, I bought stocks. So far, so good.

A few trades here, some there — all in the spirit of the times. I do believe, rather emphatically, we are living in end of days for markets. It won’t be long now until the wheels spin right the fuck off this chuck wagon and all of the participants crash neck first into the crevasse.

NASDAQ is +115. “The Fly” has work to do.

Ciao..

Comments »

Avoiding the Chop — EXODUS CHAT IS DOWN, Due to Mystery

Innumerable stocks I owned yesterday are roaring higher today, as I am left with my dick in my hand and some TZA. Markets are gently lower, which means they will soon rise up and flame broil shorts. I do not think I will make a single trade today — plus StockLabs and Exodus are down today — and my IT is AWOL — no idea where he is in Germany now. Perhaps he’s eating some schnitzel and having a large frothy beer? I’d like to believe that. Why slave over a computer when you could be eating something greasy and getting drunk?

Parts of Exodus appears to be open, except the chat room where all of you trouble makers plot and scheme to bring down elections. Maybe it’s a good thing for you too. Get out there and smell the autumn skies and enjoy this Friday as a gift.

I, on the other hand, will keep busy — presently listening to Bach… was listening to Beethoven earlier.

My morning routine is somewhat unremarkable — coffee, croissant, maybe a phone call or two, and then classical music. I find voices to annoy me in the morning and there’s a reason why Bach and the greats are still listened to for centuries.

My hopes and dreams entail me resuming my trading greatness. Yesterday’s debacle kept me in bad spirits all day long into the night. Markets, as I can see, are already whipsawing around. This is caused by sell stops and HFTs fucking retail with their digital dick chopping guillotines. Truthfully, it’s best to avoid this chop and I only say that because I failed yesterday. Had I not failed, I’d be THE CHOP MASTER today, telling the world about my greatness.

The Dow is -55, NADAQ +15. No fucking idea where we head next.

I’ll get Pelican room back up as soon as Ze Germans materialize.

Comments »