Amidst Unprecedented Stupidity, Saudi Arabia Taps the Debt Markets

People are making a big deal about Saudi Arabia tapping the debt markets for $32 billion big ones today. Before we all start feeling bad for House Saud, let’s remember that the greatest transfer of wealth has just occurred, from west to east, courtesy of the fucktards in our State Dept. who decided that the best course of action to tackle the terrorist problem was middle east regime change.

They (House Saud) were the morons who decided to attempt to break the backs of the good oil men in the Bakken Shale, by refusing–repeatedly–to cut production. It truly was a sight to behold, coming from an organization that was hell bent on higher prices…always. Then, all of a sudden, amidst a 30% drop in crude, they refused to cut production in favor of retaining market share.

Morons.

Now they have 326 million barrels of crude in reserve, the most since 2002. Economic growth has collapsed from +10% to +3%. They’re delaying payments to contractors, and are entirely fucked, in the streets, without shoes.

And this:

“It’s hard to hold back from boosting spending when oil is on the rise, but very hard to cut when oil prices fall,” Simon Williams, chief economist for central and eastern Europe, the Middle East and North Africa at HSBC Holdings Plc, said in e-mailed comments. “Cuts are coming — the budget deficit is too large to ignore and pretend it’s business as usual.”

Saudi Arabia will cut production, sometime within the next 6 months. Oil stocks will fucking surge like beasts out of hell, or bats out of a cave, then everyone will fade oil–making a mockery of the little men who walk around with circles on their heads.

There is an OPEC meeting Wednesday. No one expects them to cut production, which is why it’s such a great trade. Oil stocks are rangebound anyway. I love long oil ahead of any OPEC meeting for the next six months.

Fucking monarchy in the 21st century. Give me a break.

Top oil pick: SLCA

It’s natural for us to want to run freely without restrictions, behave in shameful ways, succumbing to our basest insticts of depravity, gluttony and murderous rages.

A great man once said “any fool can make a million. The trick is to keep it.”

Let that 19th century victorian knowledge sink in for a minute.

This isn’t a market without risk. As a matter of fact, it’s filled with nothing but risk, from oil to tech to biotech, it’s wrought with grave dangers that are liable to come out of the $BLUE to wreck your morning commute.

My biggest loss in a decade occured last year in FEYE. I allowed a massive position turn from up 15% to down 35%. It was a detrimental blow to my business, reputation, and peace of mind. I am still recovering from it.

At the very root of my mistake was hubris and permitting past success offer me a false sense of security.

Listen to me. Nothing is promised, not even tonight’s dinner. I have my thumb exposed to the market winds like no one else. The winds are easterly (Bleak House) and this reprieve is temporary.

Take profits, cut losses short, stop using golden aged thinking to mold your future.

During the last chapter of this great blogging experient, I would’ve considered this a success if I taught you just that. I knew a man who threw away $3 million in one stock because he felt it would go higher. Market’s don’t care about your feelings.

Stocks are soft today, thanks in large part to the commodity related industries getting drilled into the ground.

I find myself inoculated from any semblance of pullbacks, heavily long BIDU–the great chinese lying company. I’d love to make money in American companies, stocks that attract the fattest amongst us (WTW); but I’ve been unable to find respite outside of the oil and gas space. Those stocks are being liquidated today, without honors.

All that aside, the daunting nature of climbing walls and hopping over barbed wired fences: this market is going the fuck higher.

LISTEN TO ME: the month of October ends with your face filled with candy corns, happy as a goat in a field of grass, long equities because Le Fly motivated you. Fuck your inhibitions and lack of courage. These are the times to take advantage of markets. I just liquidated the rest of my UNFI position. It served me well, having made 8% in the past few weeks in it. But it’t time to move on, so I added to my long bet on Randall J Kirk, via XON.

Any company that intends to genetically modify cats is a company I am in league with.

What a joyous occasion for so many of you flesh eating ball kickers.

Remember the good times when markets rolled and then rolled some more.

Its been a rough couple of month’s for Randall, as he hem and hawed over his lost fortunes, likely playing with his pet birds of prey, partaking in human anatomy experiments and things of that nature.

It’s important for you to know that “The Fly” was an arch advocate of Mr. Kirk last year, having bought his stock, XON, in the mid teens. I sold out and the stock doubled, only to come crashing back down in the great biotech debacle of 2015.

This is where I draw the line. Great biotech routs should always preclude the likes of great men, such as Randall. It is his god given right to enjoy the fruits of labor, bask in the glory of research, and to lead the life his was meant to lead.

In other words, I bought XON.

Congressman Boyle just tweeted that Joe “Einstein” Biden will run for President.

You have no idea how happy this makes me. Biden is one of the funniest people on the planet, without really knowing it. Plus, he looks like George Washington.

Oh you’re worried about his politics? Stop pretending your vote matters and accept that the Order of the Cinncinatus and House Dupont selects our Presidents for us, for they know more and work tirelessly to protect the empire of the United States, ensuring that the immigrant plebian class here do not interrupt their plans.

I remember the housing boom of 2005. This is not a 2005-like environment.

For one, my neighbors aren’t flipping homes. And, secondly, the number one gauge of a kick ass homebuilder market, the stocks of homebuilders, have been sucking wind–down 10% over the past 6 month.

Neverthless, the jackasses at the NAHB continue their doublespeak.

“This upward momentum shows that our industry is strengthening at a gradual but consistent pace,” David Crowe, chief economist at NAHB, said in a statement. “With firm job creation, economic growth and the release of pent-up demand, we expect housing to keep moving forward as we start to close out 2015.”

There are 3 homebuilder stocks that have shown outperformance over the past three months: NVR, CVCO and DHI. Both KBH and WLH are the most heavily shorted, with more than 25% of their respective floats sold short.

Just when you thought the IPO pipeline was dead, lo and behold the market went and rallied last week, leaving it wide open for a bunch of new fuckers to take advantage of it.

Brace yourselves. I know you’re chomping at the bit, dying to allocate clients, receive that concession you so eagerly deserve.

Higher

M&A news: CCG +19.7% (acquired by Harrison Street Real Estate Capital for $7.03/share, or ~$1.9 bln), PMCS +13.3% (MSCC proposes to acquire PMCS for $11.50/share, or ~$2.4 bln; says $SWKS bid sucks balls and theirs is the shit), DBD +3.3% (whatever).

WTW +58.9% (Fat lady named Oprah bought 10% and has option to buy another 5), CPXX +9.6% (FDA shit), ZFGN +9.1% (dead cat bounce), PLX +7.8% (positive data), OCN +7.5% (paying down a little debt; big fucking deal, right?), PLUG +5.6% (no one gives a shit), TSYS +2.6% (blah, blah, blah), DB +2.5% (German bullshit), NAT +2.5% (CRAMER PUMP), TKC +1.7% (mystery!).

Lower:

In reaction to disappointing earnings/guidance: MS -4.5% (fucked), VRX -2.3% (raises guidance; fucked nonetheless).

GNCA -32.2% (phase 2 fails; fucked), GLDD -15.6% (withdraws guidance; in other words, fucked), SDRL -5.8% (whatever), PBR -3.7% (they suck), ZINC -2.8% (miners fucked), FCX -2.4% (fucked), SUNE -2.2% (mystery;fucked)

Analyst comments: UBNT 3.3% (downgraded to shit at JMP Securities), ORCL -1.4% (downgraded to fucked at Pacific Crest), TEF -1.3% (downgraded to horrible from fucked at Credit Suisse), STX -1.1% (downgraded to blah from tits at Susquehanna).

Larry does it again.