BASTARDS: Now I Punch You Through the Ropes

One year ago, this website was buzzing with inbound links from other craven, vulture like, finance websites–bearing witness to “The Fly” being taken down a few notches. Each and every blog I penned was accompanied by 50-200 comments, most of which were authored by peasant fuckheads who only came to see my BALs (big ass losses). These people are all but dead now, annihilated by my dominance and winship.

Fast forward one year to the day and I am literally bowling on you fuckers, screaming higher and dragging your faces across the pavement from the back of my pick up truck.

Check this out. This is how 2015 ends: Fly manning in his orbital space cannon (OSC), drinking a 40 ounce of malted liquor, burning down your houses and shit. You can’t stop me, son; you can only hope to contain me.

I punch your fucking heads off and see your entire body move rapidly through the ropes. The crowd screams “KNOCKOUT!” and the referee pull out a 45 magnum and fires six shots into your head to end the contest.

“Fly wins again. Fly wins again. Fly wins again.”

I don’t give a shit about today. Tune in this evening at 7pm for a live QnA chat session inside Exodus. I will answer any questions that you might have about the software and will try to give you some quick tips. I will be doing this each and every Sunday, until I am dead and buried inside of my pineapple coffin.

Both SAFM and PPC are edging higher, buoyed by seasonality factors and also due to giving ZERO FUCKS about the bird flu in ‘Merica. We will eat the bird flu and lather BBQ sauce on it to boot.

There are big shorts in these names and it is the perfect wall of worry to climb. All of these bears out and about fear mongering over the food supply.

PFFFFFFFFFF.

These two meat stocks are gonna light fires onto the faces of short sellers, then broil them for fastidious ingestion.

Last year I denigrated these hallowed halls with my cheap blood. I brayed and bled out in disgusting form. Since 2006, I’ve been live blogging my fucking trades and have never disappointed until 2014. Epic mistakes were made and I lost my way.

Through the rabble and sinister draw-downs, a new Fly was born, one that eschewed draw-downs and utilized the true powers of his calculator brain, though Exodus, to its fullest potential.

I want you to see me now, don’t just look at me. My gains are 24%, year to date, boxing people’s faces off and eating their livers raw. As you can see by the comments section, it’s a desolate ghost town, hardly anyone talking shit. Inception to date, I’ve banned over 3,000 criminals from accessing the site, even more from commenting. There are levels to this shit, starting with the worst of you getting pan-site ban through IP address.

I haven’t even had a monster winner yet. Wait for it.

I added to both YELP and FEYE positions. After all, what could possibly go wrong?

Noble Energy is buying ROSE for a 32% premium. Aside from the lunacy of BABA teaming up with ZU this weekend, this deal strikes me and also dumbfounds me.

ROSE is the biggest piece of shit in the oil patch. They’ve been striking out for years, missing one earnings estimate after the next. Without a doubt, this is going to stoke interest in real oil companies, like FANG, BTE and PDCE.

While I am not a fan of oil here, heading into the summer, I would not be surprised to see some names, like OAS, SN and AREX, go on a gorilla run because of this deal.

Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like to only have to worry about blowing clouds of orange cheeto dust off my keyboard, like the lot of you. Instead of seeing everything for what they truly are, I could live in the dark, an ignorant fat pig, beholden to nothing but my own caprices. I’d drink myself to sleep and wake up at noon to the bottle again. I’d fornicate with whores and trick others into letting me burglarize their homes.

There is a means to this end. As the trollop class around us shoot and stab each other in the face for rubbered sneakers, billions are made in industry–all represented in the stock market.

I find equanimity in the markets. A soothing sensation arrests me when I am wrong. I fight, claw, and shoot my way out of jams, constantly evolving my methods to conform to trends. Need I remind you that Exodus is running at an astounding 80% win rate in timing market bottoms since 2009?

Maybe you should blow away that cheeto dust now and join the league of gentlemen inside our hallowed halls?

It’s just a suggestion. Then again, what the fuck do I know?

This is a gem of a movie. However, let this be a fair warning to the lot of you morons out there who’ve never picked up a book: you might not know what the hell is going on here. The movie is about a guy in a fucked up engagement, traveling back in time– getting to hang out with literary geniuses. He’s a golden age thinker and looking for inspiration for a book he is trying to write.

Lo and behold, when he travels back in time and gets to hang out with the baddest motherfuckers, circa swinging 20’s, he also falls for a dame. Plus, Marion Cotillard stars in it, alongside Rachel McAdams, which should lure plenty of you perverts over to watch this incredible film.

NOTE: Next week I will wrap up Woody Allen. However, it will be hard, since there are at least a dozen films that I strongly favor. After Allen, I intend to go old school and talk Hitchcock.

If I make lots of fucking money and simply drink hot, hot coffee all day long, I don’t need to eat food. I haven’t eaten a fucking thing all day long and do not have the slightest hankering for flesh (no vampire).

I know what you’re thinking and you’re right: The Fly shouldn’t partake in starvation on this scale, especially since it will turn him into a beanpole without muscles. Do not fear my friends, I intend to eat with great vigor and tenacity soon. I only reveal this scientific study with you in order to help fight global starvation.

For example: Africa.

If we can simply get them accounts at TD Ameritrade (extra Sherrod) and have them read iBankCoin (super Fly), send them mass quantities of coffee (no K-cup), their problems will be all but solved.

I am up 2% for the day, 23% for the year, firmly punching people in the fucking face whenever they look at me sideways.

I kicked out of FINL (+5%) and ANAC (+13%) and bought FEYE (revenge trading bitch) and JUNO.