iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,354 Blog Posts

Fly Buys: GLW, UMPQ

I bought 2,000 Corning Incorporated [[GLW]] @ $15.40 and 5,000 Umpqua Holdings Corporation [[UMPQ]] @ $8.32.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, the Italian mafia will make you an offer you cannot refuse. And, you may lose money.

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Prepare For iPhone Madness

The new iPhone is going to be fucking huge. Back in the old days, “The Fly” only saw value in rotary phones and “drug dealer style” beepers. However, he has seen the light, with regards to gadgets and how they infect the minds of the weak. People will buy the new iPhone, even if it meant starving their newborns or killing their dogs.

The obvious winner is Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] . But, I’ve been playing the launch, indirectly, via OmniVision Technologies, Inc. [[OVTI]] . For the first time ever, a video camera will be in the iPhone and OVTI is the supplier. Can you say “better than expected earnings”?

Other beneficiaries of the new phone are Cypress Semiconductor Corporation [[CY]] , Synaptics, Incorporated [[SYNA]] and Starent Networks Corp. [[STAR]] . Both CY and SYNA enable touch screen functions, while STAR is the dominant leader in core routers. In other words, you would not have internet access, for your iPhone, Blackberry or any other smart phone, without STAR.

Additionally, Alcatel-Lucent (ADR) [[ALU]] and [[ERIC]] are key players in building out the new 4g network. If those euro-trash types could get their acts together, both stocks could run much, much higher.

As for today’s trading:

Oil and gas stocks are weak, while banks spiral higher. Unfortunately, tech is sitting this rally out, which means the market can sell off into the bell. Without a doubt, this market is becoming quite cumbersome to gauge and trade.

Good news for you leveraged ETF home gamers: The bastards from Pro-shares have decided to launch a new set of leveraged ETF’s, based upon the success of wiping out the majority of investors in their previous products.

Here are the new 200% long/short ETF’s:

Long
EET: Pac rim, ex-Japan
XPP: China
EZJ: Japan
EFO: Europe

Short
EPV: Europe
JPX: Pac rim, ex-Japan
BZQ: Brazil
SMK: Mexico

Enjoy!

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Get Your Rally Monkeys Ready

If I was a fucking plant, I’d love this NYC weather. Unfortunately, I am not water proof and do not appreciate “God urine” blessing me on a daily basis. What happened to global warming, Mr. Tree Fucker? My carbon footprint is so big, so egregious, one would think that “The Fly” just doesn’t give a fuck.

Hmmm.

You heard it here first, folks, the market correction is over, prepare for new highs. Today’s “market math” is as follows: oil up+dollar down+(banks up+tech up)= Fuck you shorts, you’re dead.

It’s that simple.

Despite my bullish leanings, I will not deploy the 10% cash on my sidelines, mainly because I am perfectly content NOT being a bullish lunatic. The way I figure, I need 20% cash in order to effectively hedge my positions, if need be. So, with that in mind, I will be a net seller, into any rallies.

There is one sour flavour [sic] to this market: potential capacity utilization slowdown at TSM. Without getting too detailed, just know, if the semiconductor foundries start to cut back production, I will be out of this market faster than chocolate cake on a fat mans desert tray.

Top picks: OVTI, GLW

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Chart Chomping 101, Hosted by The Fly

Okay folks, this is really important/ high grade shit. I am allowing you to be privy to the “magic of circles and triangles” and how they portend certain doom and disaster within equities.

Notice how the circles and “dorito-like” triangle are fucking with each other. It’s almost as if the triangle is laughing at the pathetic circles for being a pair of pussies. On the other hand, the circles have the triangle in a “super-fucked hemlock” which can result in a disastrous market calamity, even nuclear war.

In my work, as a licensed “chart-chomper,” I have never seen the circles attempt this move. This move is equal to or worse than applying the figure four leg lock onto a person with two broken legs; yeah, it’s that fucking bad.

The only way this market can survive such a predicament is via the formation of a “super-triangle fuck you style pizza hamburger” formation. Let me tell you, if such a thing were to occur, the short sellers would be better off traveling back in time to abort their own births, than endure such a torturous move to the upside.

It’s that serious, people.

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My Patience is Wearing Thin

Once again, I was wrong for not paring down longs and initiating shorts. There are a lot of cross currents in the market that is tricking me into “deer in headlight” inaction.

First, we have people like Guy Adami getting all bearish and shit, a very ominous sign for the sellers. Then, we have persistent downside action in the dollar, while oil/gas goes up. Simultaneously, commodity related names are having their clocks cleaned, based upon fears of a looming market correction.

Recent market leaders, banks, CRE, tech and commodity stocks, were exceptionally weak today, which contributed to the late day reversal in the indices. The risk to money managers, who missed out on the recent run, is NOT buying this dip, then watching the market firecracker their faces off.

It’s a fight for market dominance, where many people will get tricked into bankrupting themselves into a Halfway House. Despite my bullish leanings, my patience is wearing thin. I don’t have time to fuck around, waiting for the bulls to take what’s theirs. I will be assessing my positions tonight, and plan for adverse market behavior over the near term.

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THE ADAMI BOTTOM

I swear on a stocks of flaming Korans, “The Fly” was about to go short stocks, via a basket of inverse ETF’s, until Guy “Burnt Toast” Adami started with the bear talk on the teevee. No offense to Guy and non-flaming Korans; but I’d rather take stock advice from my local garbage man, than follow that fucker into a trade.

So far, I have no executed any meaningful trades today. I am just, sort of, roaming around, talking to strange people on the telephone, while watching the stand up comedians on CNBC. On the day, I am almost flat, as most of my positions have “swung” back to green, thanks in large part of the cowardice of any and all bearshitters.

With the dollar selling off again, coupled with benign commodity prices, I would not be surprised to see the market do a “full reversal,” dumping the severed heads of short sellers into idle vats of raw sewage.

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Something is Brewing

Guy Adami thinks the market goes lower. He’s on the teeeveee suggesting to sell short JPM. Listen, I have serious reservations following The Great Tanned one into egregious murderholes, designed to snatch the wallets of idiot bearshitters, just prior to getting homo-hammered to death.

Fuck that.

Is it just me, or is EVERYONE with a series 7 license north of Havana bearish on stocks here? I suppose they are guided by the INCREDIBLE-HORRIFIC news of MS, GS, JPM and co. paying back their TARP funds. How fucking dare they!

Then we have S&P downgrade a slew of banks today, due to fears of regulation. Puhlease. Fuck you very much S&P.

For the record, I have been selling out of my winners, while holding losers—a cardinal sin, indeed. Some of my top long positions include FTK, GLW, OVTI, and GME. Additionally, I still own lotto tickets in ENTR, TRID, FNSR, CNXT, ATML and SIFY.

My shorts are limited to minor/legacy positions in FAZ, SRS. However, I was thinking about taking on some new shorts, until burnt toast went on the teeeveee espousing gloom and doom. That doesn’t sit very well with me.

Objectively, the trading action in FAZ, SRS, DUG, ERY and SMN is good. However, before I start slapping people in the face with hot mops, I want to see a little more conviction, from the bears, on this alleged downward move.

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THE RETURN OF HORATIO CLAWHAMMER

Once upon the time, HORATIO CLAWHAMMER blogged here, filling in for “The Fly” or Senor Tropicana, whenever they were out throwing m-80’s at piker brokers on Wall Street. HORATIO was into betting against America and all industry. As a point in fact, after having in depth discussions with MR. CLAWHAMMER, I can tell you, sincerely, he felt the fair value for stocks was “without a doubt, $00.00.”

As it happens, HORATIO was allegedly killed (the body was never recovered), via anvil gone mad, during the GREAT BULL MARKET OF 2009. However, people close to HORATIO tell me “that motherfucker is in fact ALIVE.”

Aside from HORATIO, I’ve been thinking about the market and I might just bet against myself, via tester short sales. After all, I have little to lose throwing on some hedges, since I am already heavily long. Long time readers of my Godly blog know and understand that I am never the quickest out of the gates. However, once I home in on my enemy (enemy being you), I “Tasmanian devil” myself into the winners circle, because I like to win meaningless trophies decorated with fancy fucking ribbons and shit.

In short, maybe I shouldn’t beat the horse so much. Maybe, just maybe, it’s time for HORATIO CLAWHAMMER to come out of hiding and throw a few malatov cocktails into the Larry Kudlow nightly circle jerk fest.

Food for thought and I am hungry.

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