HAPPY 4th of JOOLIE AMERICA; THE DAY OF THE GRILL IS HERE

So what do you faggots have planned for the day? Let me guess, chaotic drinking around hot coals and meat? How unique. I am sure our forefathers are proud, peering down on you lazy cookie eating booze hounds.

It seems the news flow is incredibly slow the past few days. Even the leakers take vacations and the world slows down for a few glorious days, as America celebrates her independence from the evil English.

If any of you are in the market for a new teevee show, I highly recommend the patriotic AMC show ‘Turn’, detailing the spy ring in and around NYC, which helped George Washington and his band of amateur marksmen beat the shit out of the best army in the world.

As for me, I’ll be grilling all day, perhaps drinking a quality beverage or two, and then lighting some illegal firecrackers in the backyard. Very unique.

Fourth of July aside, what do you men of leisure have planned for the summer? Any exotic destinations or perhaps a nomadic road trip or two? I, myself, am planning a road trip up into the northeast corridor of the United Steaks and would be glad to drive you off the road, if given the chance. Inside the confines of the United States, there aren’t many honorable vacation destinations anymore. The west is littered with a Sodom and Gomorra type degeneracy. The south is too damned hot, filled with insects and red necks. The midwest is, well, the midwest — leaving only the genteel north as a place a person of substance and importance might unwind for a week or two, surrounded by the water and regality of historic monuments defining America’s greatness. None of that exists out west, a place populated by criminals and mountebanks, wholly interested in escaping the arm of the law or hitting pay dirt amidst the scoundrels in the fields digging for treasure.

Try not to blow your fingers off this 4th of Joolie. Godspeed.

Back in 2008, I gave Bill a lot of flack for being retarded. I even co-produced an Asshat of the Year Award video in an attempt to ruin his life.

But Bill is back on top again, hot shit, running money like a god damned gladiator.

His picks, while somewhat simple and retarded, ended up being pure gold.

The money manager gained 49 percent in the past year following a disastrous stretch. That’s made the Miller Opportunity Trust No. 1 for the year ended June 30 among diversified funds with at least $1 billion in assets, according to data compiled by Bloomberg. In the year-earlier period he lost 27 percent.

Best known for beating the S&P 500 for 15 straight years, Miller prospered by picking beaten down securities in industries including retailing, financials and airlines. The $1.5 billion fund’s biggest holding, retailer RH, owner of Restoration Hardware, has more than doubled in 2017. A JPMorganChase & Co. warrant is up more than 100 percent over the past year. MGIC Investment Corp., which provides mortgage insurance, gained 88 percent over 12 months while United Continental Holdings Inc. climbed 83 percent.

“A year ago people were worried about a slowdown or even a recession,” Samantha McLemore, Miller’s long-time co-portfolio manager, said in an interview. “We looked at a lot of our holdings at the time and thought they represented great values.”

Miller, 67, became one of America’s most prominent money managers during his streak at Legg Mason Value Trust, which was snapped in 2006. He stumbled badly during the financial crisis, losing 55 percent in 2008, triggering major redemptions. The forerunner of his current fund, Legg Mason Opportunity Trust, lost 65 percent in 2008 and 35 percent in 2011.

Miller, who ended his longtime affiliation with Legg Mason in February, said his troubles in the down years were the result of investor fears about the global economy. “When it is all macro, we do poorly,” he said in an interview last July.

McLemore said she and Miller don’t share the widely held view that stocks are overvalued. “The overall direction of the market is up until we reach a point of extreme euphoria,” said McLemore. “We are a ways from that point.”

Ask yourselves this question: are you better than Bill?

The answer is ‘no’, fucked faces

Two hundred and forty one years ago, our forefathers fought to declare its independence against evil tea taxers from England. Men like George Washington, John Hancock, and Thomas Jefferson envisioned a country free from the tyrannical grips of an oppressive government.

Today, the state of Oregon has declared its own independence, from the DNA helix that defines human life — issuing genderless drivers licenses, ceding order to the mentally ill who lobby them.

Congratulations to the .005% of the population that is now in control of the unhinged democratic party. Full steam ahead.

Tech stocks are being punished today, on the eve of hot dog and bottle rocket day.

The rotation has never been more abundantly clear with the Dow up 180 and the Nasdaq lower. Anyone positioned in NVDA today is hating life, while the Goldman and the Citi stock holders toast to America’s prosperity.

Also, commodity stocks are ripping higher, sans gold, thanks to both a bounce in crude and rotation into an underowned sector.

This is the part where weak hands become lost, dispirited, and give up under an avalanche of losses.

I’m unsure how long this rotation will last. It seems more opportunistic than rational, considering commodities are beset with horrible fundamentals. Also, small capped stocks are outperforming large cap in every day, for two weeks straight. This tells me, large hedge fund and asset managers have been both selling and losing money.

The positive spin is that banks are a great sector for the market to follow higher and tech is merely taking a breather.

Happy 4th of July.

File this one under ‘fake news’ or deceptive news. Here’s some moron at Bloomberg trying to extrapolate the price of beef at the store and the restaurant by what he sees in the stupid futures market. Get what pinhead, life in the real world is expensive. Illegal Mexicans cost at least $8 per hr to employ at eateries and the price of steaks, especially good ribeyes, have NEVER BEEN MORE EXPENSIVE.

I go to the grocery store and only buy grass fed beef. Believe me, I’m not a fanatic when it comes to organic and grass fed, but only when it comes to beef. I am not interested in getting infected with ecoli. Ergo, I avoid it all together by opting for grass fed. Very simple.

At my Whole Foods, the grass fed steaks are these scrawny little nothings, compared to the big, fat, juicy, potentially poisonous ones. I feel like a bearded hipster ordering a slither of grass fed for $20, or a pound of ground for $11.99. PRICES ARE INSANE. Do not tell me prices are falling, Bloomberg.

American beef production is expected to climb 4 percent this year to 26.292 billion pounds, the highest since 2010, the U.S. Department of Agriculture estimates. The gain comes as feed has stayed cheap for livestock producers, with corn futures falling for four straight years through 2016. Pork and chicken output will both reach records.

Higher output is helping to keep ground-beef prices low at the grocery store. Retail costs have stayed cheap even as wholesale costs climbed, signaling that consumers will likely enjoy lower bills for the next year and a half as production keeps expanding, said Chris Hurt, a professor of agricultural economics at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana.

Wholesale beef is up 11 percent this year to $2.2473 a pound. By contrast, retail ground beef is unchanged since the end of last year at $3.559 a pound as of May, down 4.3 percent from 12 months ago, Bureau of Labor Statistics data show. Prices reached $3.547 in April, the lowest since January 2014.

I was out all day, partaking in whatever it was I was partaking in. Futures are higher. The day of the grill fast approches. Get your firedcrackers ready for explosions.

Look at what you did to the President, main stream media. Donald was perfectly happy playing with the boats, taking a few photos of himself in front of the White House, with his pals General Flynn and Steve Bannon. But you had to ruin the party. Now he’s snapped, tweeting videos of himself body slamming people with CNN’s logo superimposed on them — ahead of the Putin meetings.

Poor Putin will be terrified with ‘Crazy Donald’ in the room. How do you expect America to deal with its enemies with such a lunatic in the White House now?

#FraudNewsCNN #FNN pic.twitter.com/WYUnHjjUjg

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 2, 2017

Here’s CNN’s reaction. Clearly, they’re not apologizing for their behavior, causing our President to go mental.

The perpetually angry and scorned Anna Navarro said the President is going to get someone in the media killed.

DHS Cheif says nothing to see here, carry on.

If you thought Trump was going to chill out after the Morning Joe drama, you were wrong. He’s after Joe and Mika again, in addition to rubbing salt in the wounds of fake news media outlet, CNN.

Crazy Joe Scarborough and dumb as a rock Mika are not bad people, but their low rated show is dominated by their NBC bosses. Too bad!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 1, 2017

I am extremely pleased to see that @CNN has finally been exposed as #FakeNews and garbage journalism. It's about time!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 1, 2017

Foreseeing the Russian scandal going nowhere, democrats are now preparing a new angle to remove the President, which entails invoking the 25th amendment, claiming the President is mentally unfit to rule.

The 25th amendment has never been tested and doesn’t apply to eccentric people. It was meant to be used for a truly mentally disabled sitting President, not one as lucid as Trump. Nevertheless, that isn’t stopping democrats, led by Rep. Raskin.

Rep. Raskin

The way it would work is simple. A council would be formed between democrats and republicans, both choose their favorite psychiatrists to evaluate The Donald, led by a former statesmen — like President Obama or Clinton. The group would then select another person to chair the council and the President would be thoroughly evaluated to determine if he could lead the American people in his mental state.

The only hitch: it needs the approval and blessing of the Vice President. Without Pence setting this carnivale in motion, it’d be very hard to start the process.

First off, it’s important to remember that the 4th of July is a holiday designed for bomb throwing trash. With that in mind, you’d be wise to deter any and all people from wanting to visit you on this indecorous day. Henceforth, I will teach you how this is to be accomplished.

Shop at your local discount store for hotted dogs. If you can grab them in the 99 cents store, fantastic. Be sure to BBQ them to a nice smokey char and serve them with gobs of generic mustard. Really layer it on thick. It’s rude to assume everyone would like generic mustard on their hotted dogs. Therefore, that’s exactly what you’ll do.

Announce to your guests, ‘my refrigerator is on the fritz’, to explain why your beer is so damned warm. You’ll try to succor your guests by providing a singular styrofoam coolers, but it’ll have an inadequate amount of ice in it. Plus, there will be a small hole on the bottom of it that will cause the ice to melt at twice the rate (trust me, I know).

Don’t bother visiting Whole Foods for the beer stock. Play the dietician and place yourself on the moral high ground, towering above your slobbish guests, by serving lite gluten free IPA, which actually tastes like someone mashed up a pined cone, mixed it up with some rubbing alcohol, then tossed into a really cool bottle and sold it for $20 per 8oz.

While your guests attempt to enjoy the swill, you will, repeatedly, tell them the virtues of a gluten free diet and how wheat gives kids cancer. This will make them feel like baby killers, bad parents, and like morons, generally speaking.

The hotted dogs will be served a little too hot, dripping with hot mustard, on a gluten free bun — hard as a hand grenade. You might as well substitute it with two pieces of cardboard, in the event you run out. They will taste dreadful, which is the point.

Side dishes include coled slaw, served hot with cold mayo, potato salad mixed with salsa and corn (mexican style), and potato chips, gluten free of course — and stale. Let the bad ‘air out’ for a few days prior to the event. Be sure the chips are salt free too — because salt causes heart attacks and you’ll have none of that at your fucking party.

Also, entertain your guests, especially the out of shape ones. Offer an enormous amount of helpful health tips — and workout routines. They’ll love that, as the generic mustard drips from their chin and into their lukewarm cup filled with pined cone tasting swill.

With regards to music, declare punk rock and ‘hair rock’ to be the predominant form of “Americana” — blasting the very worst of the hits from the 1980’s. You must play lots of KISS. The ladies go nuts for those guys.

Inside of 1hr, your guests will begin to become irritated, so you’ll need to increase that discomfort with a little outside assistance.

Before inviting your guests, be sure to sprinkle your lawn with sugar and have a kiddie pool filled with water, just to the side of your soiree. By dusk, your lawn will be festooned with swarms of mosquitos, literally eating your guests alive. Suddenly, your central cooling system will be on the ‘fritz’ too — transforming the the inside of your house into a boiling hell-pit. The walls will be dripping with agony.

Since outside will be morbidly uncomfortable, a cartoonish display of nature having its way with your 4th of Joolie bash, coupled with the sweltering heat inside your wonderful and inviting home — causing some to feel nauseous, you will have no choice but to call it a night — pleading with your guests for their forgiveness, as a set of ‘black swan’ events beset you on such a joyous day of fired crackers, pomp and lots of circumstance.

As they get into their expensive cars, bidding you farewell, some cantankerous teenagers will begin firing bottle rockets at your direction, expediting the departure by a factor of 10.

You will tip your hat to the fine young lads from across the street and declare the party over.

Good day.

The half has ended with a moronic drop in the SPY to cap off a fun filled quarter.

No complaints here. The half was pleasant, with plenty of distractions to keep me thoroughly entertained. While I realize some of you despise me for discussing politics and espousing ‘hate-filled’ idealogies, you’re gonna have to trust me when I say ‘go fuck yuorself.’

A few things of EXTREME importance.

#1: The long awaited iBankCoin library is here, stocked with all of Option Addict’s archived bootcamps. You can purchase each episode for $39. I am iTunes now.

#2: I will be updating both the GARP portfolio and Bubblw Basket in Exodus this weekend. I’ve spent the better part of my night’s for the past 2 weeks concocting a portfolio

#3: Here’s the comprehensive rundown of the first half of 2017. Enjoy.

Happy Joolie 4th holiday weekend. Try not to blow your faces and fingers off with them firecrackers.

My brother in law is scheduled to vacation in Vietnam soon. I know many people who’ve traveled there, spent good money, and I never quite understood why. There are innumerable places to visit, most of which aren’t home to a place that killed and maimed hundreds of thousands of American soldiers. If that isn’t enough for you, how about civil rights?

Do they mean anything to you, or are they simply a convenience for you to invoke, whenever you’re trying to make a drunken partisan statement about politics?

A 37 year old mother/blogger was just sentenced to a decade in a Vietnamese prison cell for ‘anti-state propaganda.’ Hell, if I was blogging in Vietname, I’d be executed on spot.

Source: CNN

Nguyen, also known by her blogging pseudonym, Me Nam — which translates to “Mother Mushroom” — was convicted of “conducting anti-State propaganda.”

The 37-year-old, whose pseudonym originated with her nickname, “Mushroom,” for her daughter, runs a blog which is frequently critical of the government, and covers issues such as land confiscation, freedom of speech and police brutality.
She is famous for using the tagline, “Who will speak if you don’t?”

Nguyen also came to the attention of authorities in 2009 for her outspoken views against China’s intervention in her country, including Beijing’s financing of a controversial bauxite mine in the Central Highlands.

She was arrested by the Department of Public Security on October 10, 2016, according to the state-run Vietnam News Agency (VNA), which referred to her in reports as an “anti-state instigator.”

The US called on Vietnam to release Nguyen and “all other prisoners of conscience immediately.”

Back in 2009, Nguyen was imprisoned for 10 days for “abuse of democratic freedoms and infringing on the national benefit.” In order to get released, she had to agree to give up blogging and post a handwritten letter, describing her love for Vietnam and how her country felt blogging was a poor choice to express her thoughts.

A few months later, Vietnam denied her a passport, so she decided to blog again. Now she’s going to prison for a decade.

“I write another entry on my blog, that I gave up already, but they didn’t leave me alone,” she said. “I have to take the right to say what I think.”

Wonderful country of savages. Enjoy your vacation.