A Special Message from your Government

Thank you for your service. You are all great Americans. Enjoy the cheddar cheese and shrimps.

Hank Paulson, U.S. Banking Rescue Team, Goldman Sachs 

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I bought 5,000 [[UYG]] @ $33.05, 5,000 [[WB]] @ $27.38 and 5,000 [[CORS]] @ $9.35.

Disclaimer: If you buy UYG, WB or CORS because of this post, another big bank will be bailed out. And, you may lose money.

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Our stock market is about to break the fuck out, which will lead to a new wave of self made millionaires and fat cat investment bankers.

There never was food shortages. As we now know, they were just inventory glitches.

Rejoice in the fact that the dollar is up today, clearly marking the bottom in the mired currency, at the same time deflating commodities.

People of the internet, it’s time to get dumb. If you were the type of guy who ignored news, over the past 2 months, you banked coin.

Get dumb, drunk and become rich.

Major breakout in financials. I love [[MER]], [[MS]], [[GS]], [[JEF]], [[PJC]], [[MF]], [[LEH]], [[CS]] and [[CLMS]].

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Observe.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjXUgxR4Z10 450 300]

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Check this out: buy financials.

My [[MER]] purchase was indeed real and not an experiment. Everything is topsy-turvy. Unfortunately, it took me awhile to figure this shit out.

In short, before we trade lower, we will cut through 13,000, like retarded construction guys through Home Depot.

All of the brokers are decent trades, even [[LEH]].

There is funny shit going on and I am in no mood to get in the way.

The dollar is bottoming, which may cause a short term moderation in commodity prices. On that news, I like financials and Chinese stocks, down at these levels.

For now, my top picks are MER and [[CTRP]].

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I covered some of my [[MS]] short @ $47.85.

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I bought 10,000 shares of [[MER]] @ $46.20.

Disclaimer: If you buy MER because of this post, the “credit crisis” will turn out to be real. And, you may lose money.

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China is a very stupid place. Any stock market that is able to climb by 9% in one day is run by incompetent jackasses.

I no longer fear China, after yesterday’s display of stupidity. Put me in charge of the U.S. Naval Fleet; I’ll have them making our toys for free, within 15 days!

Regarding the market:

[[FXP]] is up. I own it.

[[CTRP]], [[SNCR]] and [[GSI]] are down. We’re off to a bad start already with these longs and shit.

Fuck [[POT]]. I’m still short the name and intend on covering, under $100. Call me crazy, see if I care.

[[SKF]] is down. Good, I am out. [[SRS]] is down. Bad, I am still in.

[[TSCM]] is down, as it should be. And, [[MS]] is up, enabling “The Fly” to short more at higher prices.

In short, I no longer have designs to blow up the globe or see U.S. indices crumble like, like a large crumb cake (bad analogy, fuck you). I think the bears are weak assholes, who do not have the gumption to fulfill their destinies.

From here on, I might become an asshole dip buyer of the worst order. The type of guy who will tell you, to your face, “inflation doesn’t matter, nor do jobs; buy more [[RIMM]].”

Oh yeah, that type of guy.

Developing…

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Good for those bearshitters. Let them feel the blade of hades, like I unceremoniously felt during today’s session.

From here on, I warn you—there will be no more bearish commentary from iBC. That shit has been discussed and cordially banned from our web pages.

I want to be part of the nirvana that is taking place in the global markets, thanks to the global growth story.

Right off the bat, I want to get long shit. I mean the lowest order oil/gas stocks. The speculative juices are flowing. Therefore, I want to catch a few sharp spikes in the crappiest stocks known to man.

My watch list includes:

[[FPP]], [[TRGL]] Romanian gas, [[MPET]], [[OMNI]], [[NCOC]], [[RAME]], [[TEC]] and [[TGC]].

Regarding Chinese lottery stocks, I like them all. With China up a staggering 8.5% in early trading, expect to see [[FXP]] down another 10, while investors bank coin long lotto.

Currently, I own [[GSI]], [[CTRP]] and a little [[GU]].

First thing tomorrow, I will look to buy [[CN]], [[CHA]], [[EJ]] and [[STV]].

May the Dow blast through 13,000, on its way to 15,000 by July 4th.

Good times.

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For more useless rants.

Apply within.

UPDATE: Ducati has been rehired by iBC. Welcome back Lord Duc. Good to have you back on board the iBC team.

UPDATE II: Ducati has been fired, yet again. We are still accepting applicants.

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