18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,014 Blog Posts

I Really Hate the Fed

I’m not done making money on the short side. While it’s true, I was rudely interrupted with this rally of “death and cannibalism” by the bulls, being short. I still have it in the back of my mind. It eats away at me in my sleep. Just know, I have the motivation to “revenge trade” and slaughter all of you bulls in one sitting. It would make my life all the more glorious.

The latest Fed action disturbs me, like a drunken homeless man, inside my morning commute subway car.

Let me get this straight:

The Fed will now accept bullshit student loans at the window?


In addition, they will take on all sorts of so called AAA paper. Quite frankly, if I wasn’t so high, smoking opium from my euphoria stock market pipe, I might be concerned.

Nonetheless, the job numbers come in at -20k, BANG ZOOM.

I really need to chill the fuck out.

As for oil:

Do not ever think it will go lower, in your lifetime. Oil will trade up to $400 per barrel. It’s some sort of transfer of wealth scheme, from west to east, that you and I were not invited to.

However, you can always crash the party, via buying some [[USO]] and putting the certs in your vault.

With my money, I do not fear [[POT]] trading higher. I will short more.

Also, I am quite pleased with the behavior of [[NVDA]], [[FMCN]], [[LAZ]], [[NILE]], [[HANS]] and [[ZUMZ]].

I am building up my war chest, in order to slay you later.

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Let Wall Street Eat Steak

And may main street burn in their rice pots.

The “tale of two cities” has never been so blatant. I fear, if the market continues to climb, populism will grip main street and elect the wrong candidate for President.

Keep this in the back of your mind, when building big long positions:

Wall Street will “power dive” on news of tax increases and the reworking of free trade agreements. In addition, remember, market dives occur near tops, not bottoms.

So, as Wall Street celebrates for the fuck of it, be alert enough to avoid vast quantities of ambrosia or ingest too many deliriants.

In short, I will eat my steak, but remember the days when rice was expensive.

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Campaign Commercial: Vote Leonard the Monkey

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVc1ZoEAkEY 450 300]

NOTE: This has been a paid commercial by the “Elect Leonard the Monkey” campaign, partly subsidized by Dpeezy, since monkeys do not have any money.

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Bears Mauled in Gay May Day Rally

I should have sold all of my [[SRS]] and [[FXP]] weeks ago—but I didn’t. The short story is dead, at least temporarily, until we get some really bad news.

In the meantime, it is imperative you go long, in order to stay in the game—providing you are short. Go nibble at some stocks that are down and have big short positions.

Just today, I bought [[NVDA]], [[NILE]], [[ZUMZ]], [[FFIV]], [[FMCN]] and even a little [[GSOL]].

Thinking about SRS, I remember making my worst trade of 2007, prior to my infamous “mountain vacation.” I sold out in the 70’s, only to see it catapult to $140, almost immediately following my sale.

The point: sometimes, when things look bad, they are good—and vice versa.

That’s why in markets like this, as irrational as it is, you must pair your shorts with longs, in order to live.

On a brighter note, “The Fly” kicked three old men into oncoming traffic, in mid-town Manhattan today. All three of them wore top hats and had mahogany canes. I suspected they were short the market. Why else would they dress in such an egregious manner?

NOTE: Stay tuned for Leonard the Monkey’s campaign commercial.

UPDATE: [[CSTR]] blew away numbers. What a no brainer. People are converting their spare change into dollars, then buying furry boots at [[DECK]].

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I bought 3,000 [[NILE]] @ $52 and 5,000 [[FMCN]] @ $38.69.

Disclaimer: If you buy NILE or FMCN, you will be arrested. And, you may lose money.

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The Dumber the Better

Quit thinking. Just trade like an OTB guy. A degenerate one, if you will.

What would a degenerate OTB guy buy, right now?

Answer: the networkers.

The sector has been blown to smithereens and are saddled with big short positions.

My watch list includes:

[[GLBC]], [[FFIV]], [[RVBD]], [[NTGR]], [[MTZ]], [[RACK]], [[JNPR]] and [[EQIX]].

Thus far, I bought one stock in the sector: FFIV.

Keep in mind, this is a broken sector, with declining fundamentals. In other words, they are trades.

Looking elsewhere, retail is on fire. Take a look at [[VLCM]], [[TBL]], [[ODP]], [[CHRS]] and [[RSH]].

My favorites include: [[JCG]], [[ZUMZ]], [[SKS]], [[RL]] and [[AEO]].

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Fly Buys: NVDA, FFIV

I bought 20,000 [[NVDA]] @ $21.25 and 5,000 [[FFIV]] @ $24.25.

Disclaimer: If you buy e above stock because of this post, your only daughter will marry Dick Bove. And, you may lose money.

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Resistance, part II

Financials are spearheading the rally. I’ve got a splendid decision in front of me: sell my [[UYG]] or [[SRS]]. At this point, the market has the look and feel of a clean breakout. On the other, common sense says we’re due for a pullback.

The good news is, we are seeing a collapse in commodity related names, thanks to a strong dollar. This, as you know, was the original reason why I was buying [[SMN]]. It wasn’t a bearish call on the market. I bought SMN as a stealth bull call, thinking the commodity related names had to be sacrificed, in order to let the market run.

Finally, it looks like that trade is setting up nicely.

Right now, with my money, I like [[NVDA]] and [[HPQ]].

[[SKF]] is broken. Don’t even think about it.

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