I would be laughing at all of you assclowns, while smoking my crack pipe (bears smoke crack pipes).
My game plan would be precise and execution would be flawless, as opposed to the retarded shit I’m doing now.
Anyway, a bears life expectancy is very short, as bull markets tend to interrupt their devious plans with swift kicks to the neck and groin areas. So, I would have to make my money in a hurry.
If I were putting together a short portfolio, this is what I would do:
Long: FXY (Yen)- My cash reserves would be held in non-dollars, believing the dollar would continue to depreciate.
Long: GLD, SLV– More cash equivalent diversification.
Short: SHLD, ANF, JCG, NKE, UA, DECK, VLCM and JCP. If the U.S. is heading toward recession, all of the above retailers would get hit, badly. However, I would avoid selling luxury retailers, due to their ability to endure slow downs.
Short: C, BSC, LAZ, BBX, ABK, RDN,COWN and RBS– With the eye of the storm in credit related names, selling the above stocks would be mandatory.
Short: FDX, CSX, UPS and CHRW– Transports blow chunks when there is nothing to transport. Plus, high energy prices kill them.
Short: NOC– Even though it is widely believed that military stocks will thrive under a democratic or republican administration, it is not a given. Should the dems decide to trim spending, bet on Navy contracts to get the ax. NOC derives most of their revenue via Naval contracts.
Short PCU, X, HAYN– With worldwide economies slowing, demand for basic resources will drop significantly.
Short: GLBC, NT, CIEN, ADCT and AKAM– Again, recession will force big tech companies to trim. The above companies will get trimmed, continuously.
Long inverse ETF- DUG– I do not believe oil and other commodities will keep going up, with the exception of gold/silver, when armageddon hits. Sell black gold short.
Long inverse ETF: FXP– China has run up the most; therefore it will fall the hardest.
Long MCK, MHS, TEVA: Cost containment for the healthcare industry is a winner, especially with a democratic white house.
Long TLT– With the Fed cutting rates, treasuries should continue to be a safe haven.
Long utlities- Falling interest rates will force old fuckers to find yield and safety, pushing them into the utility sector. My favorites are VE, EN, SO, FE and GXP.
The philosophy of my fucktarded bear position would be to undermine the U.S. dollar, while focusing in on a weakening consumer, cut backs in Gov’t spending, deterioration of earnings in the financial sector and a bet that a cold in the U.S. still gives cancer to our trading partners.
I would avoid selling anything that caters to the wealthy. And, I would not sell short the homies, for fear of a sharp squeeze.Comments »