iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,309 Blog Posts

Today, for Fun, I am a Bull

Did you see those GDP numbers? Fucking smoking, man.

And, the market is so oversold, you just have to get long the banks. I mean, how low will [[LEH]] go, zero?

I don’t think so. Big investment banks NEVER go to zero. They go to $10.

Aside from the banks, solar looks sweet here. Look at [[SOLF]], [[FSLR]] and [[CSIQ]]. How could anyone deny the power of the solar panel (pun intended)? In due time, all of us will drive solar powered cars, circa 1980’s news broadcasts.

Anyway, should this market be down by 3:45 today, I have a special surprise to “jack it” higher.

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No Stock Advice For You

Today, I refuse to share financial advice with strange lurkers from the internets. Quite honestly, “The Fly” is not interested in today’s tape. Sure, the market will go up and down, bankrupting fucktarded goat fuckers along the way. But that’s the natural order of things, no?

By helping you, I am disturbing nature. As you well know, “The Fly” is a HUGE fan of nature, with all of its trees and shit. The last thing I want on my conscience is to melt down some fucking iceberg, because my pristine financial advice helped some moron from the internets build an oil refinery in the North Pole. That is unacceptable.

So, with that being said, I have numerous cups of “low-end” Dunkin’ Donuts coffee to consume, while deciding my next attack.

Developing…

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Classic CNBC

Stupid fucking bitches.

NOTE: No offense to bitches.

Hat tip: Some moron in the comments section.

UPDATE: Don’t look now, the “bullet proof” Chinese stock market is out of control bleeding red, ahead of the Godly Olympics. Who would have thought?

Short the spirits out of [[LFC]]. Those assholes have ridiculous equity exposure.

Time Machine Flashback: Fuck the Banks.

UPDATE II: It has come to my attention that an “iBC resident,” Boca, has an interesting Ebay auction going. Inadvertently,  Danny bumped into her auction of Bear Stearns squeezable bears.

Go get one.

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Chalk One Up for the Bears

How can these morons draw a parallel between the collapse of Long Term Capital and Bear Stearns?

Hey assholes, when LTCM fell, the economy was on the precipice of furious economic expansion, ala dot com bubble. Things are quite different now.

Look you, I do not have time to intermingle with retards from the internets. “The Fly” is a very busy man, with loads of work and construction projects to oversee. As you know, when the weather gets warm, I employ many “illegal Mexicans” to build shit for me.

I’m looking for a sharp decline in many of the financials. And, I am confident we will see the “ag plays” become a “source of funds,” once again.

Off to dinner.

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BEHOLD

This should offset any negative effects my “FUCK YOU LONGS, YOU”RE DEAD” post may have on my short positions.

Fly wins, again.

UPDATE: Maria Bartiromo has just pissed me off, with her excessive “we’ve rallied significantly off the bottom” rants, I just made an EMERGENCY call to my VooDoo Physician.

He told me: “Soon enough, the markets mon will be swimming in blood, mon.”

Developing…

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FUCK YOU LONGS, YOU’RE DEAD

I just wanted to gloat a little bit, in order to piss off some of the more superstitious/paranoid type.

I will tell you, with 100% conviction, [[LEH]] is an ass and should be sold indefinitely.

In addition, on the long side, I like [[RIG]] here and [[DGP]]. Without a doubt, gold is going higher.

So, to sum things up, being longs stocks is for asshats (until I decide to go long). Moreover, LEH and other banks (think [[SKF]] have significant downside left.

By the way, the JPM-BSC deal was a fucking bailout. No excuses. I’m sure the fuckers from Enron would have loved $10 per share, no?

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Commodities Are on Fire

Much to my chagrin, Vale pulled out of the Xstrata deal, which would have fetched 90 billion. As a result, a bunch of asshole basic resource names are jumping off my screen, in anticipation that Vale will direct their guns at someone new.

From [[AA]] to [[FCX]] to [[CENX]], the sector is on fire.

Also, it appears the downtrend for the wheelbarrow dollar has resumed, following a small consolidation. With that, “ag plays” are on fire, led by oil.

Basically, today’s gains are due to takeover speculation and the “inflation story” being placed back on the front burner.

Although I am being flame broiled on my [[SMN]] position, I do have minor hedges, via [[DGP]].

Both [[MON]] and [[POT]] continue to steam ahead, thanks to the crap mentioned above.

In short, the bulls are making lemonade out of today’s poor tape, by running up the commodity plays. This is very good for their case and it may spill over into the general market, by 4:00.

Fuckers.

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