iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,864 Blog Posts

Fly Buy: DUG

I bought 1,000 [[DUG]] @ $42.71.

UPDATE: I bought 1,000 @ $42.21.

Disclaimer: If you buy DUG because of this post, your toilet bowl will explode. And, you may lose money.

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To Hell in a Hand Basket

Good luck buying stocks, “bottle fucker.” I have the utmost disdain for real estate, by the way. Specifically, I despise NYC real estate, since it never goes down. With that being said, I feel it is “worthwhile” to weigh into the REIT fuckers, via [[SRS]]—in a big way.

My “chart chomping fool guy” says: “there are significant breakdowns in many of the SRS components. Feel free to go ahead and sell it, rapidly.”

In addition, I am shorting [[RIMM]], despite being long, for a trade—down to $90. And, with [[FXP]] in the low 90’s, I’m fucking tempted to throw my trader/servant down a sewer pipe and buy that fucker.

Remember, buying FXP gets you short [[LFC]], [[CHL]], [[PTR]], [[CEO]], amongst others.

In short, feel free to get drunk/smoke crackpipe and sell short stocks, again.

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Fly Buy: SRS

I bought 3,000 [[SRS]] @ $116.

UPDATE: I bought 3,000 @ $113.11

Disclaimer: If you buy SRS because of this post, the next time you order Chinese takeout, vermin will be in your rice. And, you may lose money.

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Fly Sell: RIMM

I sold short 2,000 [[RIMM]] @ $94.20.

Disclaimer: If you sell short RIMM because of this post, Warren Buffet will buy a 20% stake in the company. And, you may lose money.

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Fly Buy: SMN

I bought 1,000 [[SMN]] @ $41.61.

UPDATE: I bought 3,000 SMN @ $41.65

Disclaimer: If you buy SMN because of this post, your ink jet will run out, at the most inopportune time. And, you may lose money.

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Fly Buy: DECK

I covered some of my [[DECK]] short, buying 5,000 shares @ $113.76.

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Your Wardrobe is Unacceptable

Many of you are slobs. I look at you (“The Fly” is watching all of you) and I think to myself: “wow, what a fucktard.” I mean, quit viewing my blog in your bullshit Aramani rip off, polyester suit. Go to your local tailor and spend a good 2g’s on a high quality thread count/100% wool suit.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Keep in mind, this is a “high end” blog, where only the very wealthy or “rich” are invited. Should your net worth be under 1.1 million or your age above 47 1/2, you will be escorted off the site’s premises. So sorry, I keeps [sic] my standards.

With regards to the markets:

Who cares?

I have a long weekend ahead of me. The NYS Insurance asshats are trying to rig the system, bailing out the monolines. As a result, my [[SKF]] may not be able to reach $140, yet. Also, I’m not enjoying any spike, whatsoever, in [[VMI]]. As a matter of fact, it’s down a buck.

All in all, today is a rather opaque, yet gay, day.

I suppose things will “heat up,” later on. After all, who wants to be long stock, going into the weekend? Oooh, scary.

Top picks: [[SKF]], [[SRS]] and [[SMN]]

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