18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,506 Blog Posts

Market Rampages Higher After Fed Pisses On Inflation Data

The Fed doesn’t give a shit and there’s not much you can do about it. They will continue to pump until you’re paying $20 for a gallon of milk, providing it helps the stock market ramp higher. The moment inflation begins to hurt stocks is when you’ll see the Fed tighten.

To curb this tax, you should be very long stocks. Also, you should be very long cryptos because the dollar isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on. But that’s a rather glib and useless comment, since the dollar in fact can purchase many things and lead to a life filled with wanton hedonism, providing you attain enough of them.

Following the Fed statement to not hike rates the market took the fuck off. Conversely, the morons at Zillow continue to sink down into a grave, after news that these morons used an AI to AUTO BUY homes which led to quarterly losses of $380m and caused them to need to fire 25% of their workforce. In a just world, the CEO would be tried and executed. Alas, he will continue to jog on and invent new innovative ideas to fuck both shareholders and employees.

I am up nearly 3% for the session, looking to get 100% long by the close.

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REMINDER: Markets Do Not Trade Lower into National Festival

This morning I was scared out of my shares, things were stolen from me, as I looked at handsome profits of +2.6%, fully long, afraid of drawing down. I liquidated before 10am and they shot higher after 10am. Had I kept my shares, nothing would’ve been stolen from me. The fact that I am a victim is merely a byproduct of my own cowardice. Instead of falling prey, I could’ve spit into the face of the market and shot it dead with my Colt-45 Baldwin special. But instead, I now find myself in the inexorable position of having to reacquaint myself with the tape — a tape by the way that is REWARDING small caps in favor of large — very bullish.

We have been drifting nowhere since 11am and I had to take some Ls on some short squeeze plays. But alas, here I am back in the saddle with a mug brimming with the black and a chest filled with bravery — readying to dive back into the market with all of my monies and wit and humor.


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This is Who I Am Pal

I booked an after-hours runner in BBBY for a 70% rip. During the day I ripped out CRTX and SDIG for 10%, closing out the session +550bps.

See pal, that’s who I am and you’re nothing.

The narrative is to be long stocks heavily shorted. GAMMA SQUEEZES abounds and there’s nothing the bears can do but cover their shorts and lose their resolve.

I closed 100% long.

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The widely anticipated GORILLA RUN to $100,000 BTC has been long awaited, in what some believe will be the open salvo to an eventual run much higher. I have stopped trying to rationalize any of this and instead view cryptos as a speculator would view railroad stocks in the 1860s. This is the Wild West and although there will be Squid Coins getting rugged from thousands to zero in a second’s time, many of the principle cryptos will survive as a parallel internet. There I go trying to justify my 15x return in ETH in a little more than 1 year.

Over in the milk and honeyed lands of Stocklabs we have applied our AWARD WINNING market timing algos to cryptos, just 107 for now — but will expand upon this after my programmer comes back from his sledding expedition.

One thing is indelibly clear, and this goes without saying, we’re in a bull market! In a bull market bullish things happen. This is not the time for FUD, but instead it is time for FUN. Be grateful for having the opportune to personally enrich yourselves and escape the horrors and the pangs of middled class poverty. While Americans might be entreated to shit healthcare, schooling, and government — we are an industrious type and I believe there is value in that — being at the forefront and leadership of the SHITCOIN extravaganza. It’s all fun until you get rugged. Alas, many a railroad in the 1860s went bust and many a railroad also produced industrialists — spitting out men like Commodore Vanderbilt for all of us to gaze at his amassed wealth and castles built across the east coast of the United Steaks.

For the session, I am +70bps, genteel but firm, eagerly positioned into BITO Dec calls — optimistic that BTC is en route towards an APE RAPING RUN to $100k by New Year’s.

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A Never Sell Stock Approaches: Black Rifle Coffee

It’s rare when I like something immensely to the point of never wanting to sell it. Such is the case with today’s SPAC SBEA upon news of acquiring Black Rifle Coffee company. Although led by neocon scum and the preferred coffee of Bill KRISTOL, I cannot help to recall both vivid and fond memories of Luckin coffee before the fraud and subsequent demise.

Accounting fraud aside, I cannot remember a time when a coffee stock did not work out.

I bought the stock today and am telling you fuckers now because I don’t think I’ll ever sell. Look at me, I work at the company now.

Life is about balance, doing shit that feeeeeeeeels good and burning down factories when they’re in your way. This investment feeeeeeeels right to me and I’m a very emotional man, always to and fro, harping on this or that. On occasion I am emphatic, as is the case now.

In other news, we’ve lost our god damned minds. CAR more than doubling because MUH ELECTRIC CARS.


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Ripping Close — November Starts Off With Pageantry

I managed to correct earlier mistakes and position into the final hours correctly, higher by 62bps in trading +252bps in best ideas account and +135bps in the Quant. My feelings are largely irrelevant, as I tend to hate markets all the time but force myself to adhere to trends.

We are in November. Thanksgiving and Xmas is ahead. We will not trade lower.

That said, it’s still a traders market and if you entered today long big caps you were cucked, forced to see idiots bank inside pennies whilst you did exactly nothing. This trend isn’t new and we’ve been meandering from pennies to tera caps on a regular basis now. It is RARE to see everything up all at once, as Mother Markets works overtime to fuck with people even in bull tapes.

I closed almost filly invested, 15% cash reserves, without any after hours runners in my designs because I could not make up my mind what to buy. In the end, I underperformed because I traded poorly but I still managed to make coin. Into tomorrow I’ll be hard pressed not to sell the morning again, as I do not trust the tape and have been conditioned to absorb morning fades. Nothing about investing in the momentum portion of the market has been easy. If played right, it can be rewarding — but it’s not easy, not now.

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I sold out of my positions this morning and waited in the tall grass for a brief period and then dove right back in with verve and pure thoughts of profit — eschewing fear aside and propelling my person forward with ideas of both glamour and decadence.

Several hours later, I have sold out from all of those enterprising ideas — taking with it mostly all of my profits for the day!

I now stand before you naked, up merely 18bps, with an aura of stupidity encircling my person like a halo around an angel.

Into the close, I endeavor to increase the girth of my gains via more enterprising ideas.

Stay tuned.

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November Starts with a Boom

Lots of pennies and smalls running to kick off the holiday season run. The market is always at its best this time of year, opting for higher prices more often than not — aspirational and the very best human disposition we have to offer.

Nevertheless, in my day trading account, I am back to cash aside from my BITO calls, because I’m up 116bps and that’s a fine return for a single day and I’ve learned harsh lessons since February about greed and the toll it can take when pursued at the wrong time.

My quant was liquidated as well in order to make way for the November portfolio, which should be selected by noon.

If you’re asking me if I like the market I would answer that I do. But if you’re asking me if I trusted the market, I most certainly do not.

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Looking Ahead to November; Quantitative Strategies

I was really impressed by the Quant in October — capturing monster winners like NET (+75%), NVDA (+25%), INMD (+25%), SM (+25%) — helping to outpace the 7-8% returns of the market to +12%. It’s important to note the returns of the Nasdaq and SPY are no longer strong barometers of what your average stock is doing. Most traders are not diversified and often regale themselves with the very worst stocks in order to grab quick gains. Here are the returns for October by sector.

There are certain fundamental criteria that is consistent with stock outperformance. For example in SAAS, the best stocks are the one’s with the strongest margins. Gross margins is a must have criteria inside the Quant, in addition to revenue growth and minimum revenues levels to weed out bullshit stocks — and also revenues growth quarter over quarter to remain in stocks constantly growing. This creates a paradigm shift often, such as diving heavily into oils into their growth phase. Last year there were zero oils in the quant because they weren’t growing. While I might miss out on some big winners, by setting fundamental criteria I insulate myself from the specter of a truly horrific drawdown in shit stocks. Remember, I set it and forget it for a month and only touch the portfolio the first of every month. There is no market timing involved.

Now the criteria shifts on occasion, all dependent upon what blend of fundamentals produces the best returns. There was a time when minimum free cash flow was desired; now that is not the case.

The final arbiter is the Stocklabs Advanced Algorithm (SAA 1 month) feature, which is new to the platform. This produces a technical ranking for a 1 month time period and isn’t as sensitive to daily moves like our standard default score.

For November, looking at the screen now — it is heavily influenced by tech, oil, and banks. Healthcare seems to be absent, on par with the abysmal performance of the healthcare sector during October.

Skeptics might suggest now is a good time to buy healthcare. While this might be true, the algorithms do not give a shit about your feeeeelings and offers unemotional assessments into the heart of the market and it will shift when needed. For all we know, healthcare is about to swan dive the fuck lower again. The technical scores are weak because people are selling the fuck out of the sector.

The point is, believe in the efficient market theory, which states all available information about a stock is already known by the market matrix and summarily priced in. Our job as investors is to ride this wave and position ourselves in the best stocks, both technically and fundamentally, in order to exceed market returns.

At +34% for  2021 vs market returns of +23%, I’d say we’re doing that now. The November Quant allocation will be revealed inside Stocklabs Monday around noon. At this time we do not offer free trials. Try for a month — cancel at anytime. It’s the best, believe me.

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Fly’s Computer Brains Beats His Real Brain For October

My quantitative strategy which only uses the algorithms from Stocklabs, non-market timing, once per month allocation and hold — beat me out my trading account — booking an 11.96% gain for October to my toil of +8.3%. I was above 10%, but had some minor set backs the past day.

Today was all about bigger capped stocks or perhaps a foray into the sewers of crypto miners with names like EQOS, GREE and BKKT storming higher.

I had an off day, thanks to an overnight trade gone awry but did not let it keep me down and I am wisely and keenly positioned for the beginning of November.

We got through October unscathed and now the very best of the market is ahead.

Come Monday I will be selling the entire Quant in exchange for a new month’s Quant, so if you’re interested in following along — be sure to join us inside Stocklabs and BEHOLD the grandeur of my computer brain.

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