iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,895 Blog Posts

DISTRACTED: THE FLY ENDS SESSION 100% HOOKED *

My run is over. I can feel it in me bones — from my crown down to me cocks. The hot market hand of Feb-March has given way to something of a moron. I traded 1 billion times today and switched my opinions, LIKE A GIRL — because of uncertainty and a panache for drama. I will tell you this, and only because I care about you, do not follow me into April. If you are mirrored — UN-MIRROR yourselves and find another path.

I closed down 0.21% on a day that begged for me to be +3%. I gave up a large gain and then had to claw myself out of a hole. And I didn’t trade well. I just bought a bunch of shit — 122% LEVERAGED LONG WITHOUT HEDGES, and prayed for the best.

If we open down on Monday, I will stand before you completely castrated. The type of portfolio I entered the weekend with should be illegal. There isn’t any reason for me to have it, other than to suggest, and this goes without saying, my pink levels (on tilt, stress) is 1000000%.

Nevertheless, we will hope for the best and expect the worst — as always.

The war is going according to plan, other from the fact Putin is calling up conscripts and committing troops “to the west” for defensive posturing, when you and I both know he is going to ATTACK all the way to Warsaw.

Comments »

By the Time I Finished My Last Blog It Was Already Over

I was elated to have made 1.7% by the close of my previous blog. Smugly, I recounted my experience in the market as one does when ones is always right — reeking with glib condescension and arrogance (I had classical music on during my previous blog). I was going to teach all of you how to make money in stocks — sharing my methods and ideas. I had gained 1.7% while the yield curve inverted, war was imminent, and all on a Friday — because the stocks Gods showed me favor.

All of that shit ended when I published it and it wasn’t long before the fucking market COLLAPSED under the weight of its own hubris — taking FOOLS like me with it. I had gains, but not anymore. In replace of those gains are LOSSES, moderate now at -0.06%. One might muse at that and say “Fly fuck yourself — I am down 25% today.” Bear in mind, I am a professional.

The NASDAQ is down 80 and the 2yr inverted with the 30yr, first time since 2007. We will now see the destruction of America — all happening live over the next 18 months. You will glance back into your photo albums and remember kinder, more genteel, days — and of course PINE for the days when you had losses of -0.06% — because pain is coming largess and there is nothing you can do to stop it.

Comments »

MASSIVE RAMP IN THE FACE OF TERRIBLE HORRIBLES

Classic once again. Yield curve inverts like fuck, now +16bps on 5yr v 2yr and the IWM is +0.8%, with a slew of momo stocks taking off. Oil is flat, but oil stocks are rallying too.

BIG TECH has the day off. Today is reserved for degenerate stocks only. I am +175bps for the session — heavily LEANING in at 131% leverage. I intend to unwind this and keep my UVXY for the late day surprise. The news is slow today and we know, almost for sure, that war is all but a foregone conclusion and Russian demands for rubles from Europe is evergreen.

There is a theme running today and if you’re not armed with TOOLZ, like those in Stocklabs, at 59% overall breadth — you are missing the forest thru the trees. Here is an idea.

As part of AI aspirations for SL, I’ve created micro-industries to be able to identify micro trends as the crop up. These help me immensely when trading, as I am able to ascertain intra-day shifts quickly.

More later.

Comments »

US YIELD CURVE INVERTS — RECESSION ALL BUT A FOREGONE CONCLUSION NOW

It’s comforting to know it’s finally over.

You might be thinking to yourselves now: “this will not affect me — I am awesome” — but you are, naturally, WRONG. The Federal Reserves’s NEW MANDATE is to starve you, crush the economy until there is nothing left of it. The enemy is now inflation and you are part of the problem. What is the fastest way to stop inflation? Stop spending. What is the fastest way to stop spending? DESTROY YOU.

What is the easiest way to destroy you?

CRUSH stocks and create an unemployment scourge.

How will the Fed do this?

By increasing the cost of capital, which in turn will level the housing market, which in turn will DESTROY the banks.

The US jobs numbers were a NON EVENT today — because all we care about is, whether or not Germany will begin to freeze today — as today marks the first day of Putin’s Rubles for Gas scheme.

Comments »

NASDAQ SHEDS 9% FOR Q1; THE FLY RANSACKS +29% IN MAGNIFICENT QUARTER OF WINSHIP

SIRS —

Let this be a stern lesson for you all to never bet against Le Fly. You had your biases and now look at you — on the rocks, broken fucked radish.

And here I am, yet again as if history were repeating itself in an endless loop — winning.

What is my secret?

I’m an artist you son of a bitch. I cannot teach you or give you definitive answers because my winship cannot be replicated. It is in me — like writing was in F Scott Fitzgerald, or boozing it up like Hemingway. Lucky and most fortunate for you, for a small token of good will and some rubles, you can bear witness to my continuous and seemingly endless stream of wins and copy cat me all the way to Valhalla.

Closing +18% for March isn’t noteworthy for me — but expected in the environ we are in.

Cheers to me and to you and I will see you fucks tomorrow in Stocklabs for day 1 of the trading contest.

Comments »

SANCTION UPDATE: Why Isn’t the Ruble Rubble By Now?

Capital controls in Moscow has all but locked out any sellers of Rubles and now with the Gas for Ruble scheme about to take effect, dare I say one of the greatest FX short squeezes is underway? This is the sort of stuff that causes wars — very influential people caught SHORT rubles into what might turn out to be an unbelievable run on shorts.

The fucking Ruble is +52% off the lows.

Question for the audience: was there ever a more enticing time to own this currency than now? Before the war, Russia was a standard shithole without appeal. Now Russia is still a shithole; however, the appeal is immense with all customers of the enemy varietal FORCED to jimmy Rubles for gas, otherwise freeze to death. This is shotgun diplomacy and the alternative is Russia sitting and waiting for Europe to beg for terms.

Meanwhile, Russian stocks are ripping higher. Why? It’s rigged!

Like in a boiler room, sell tickets are tossed in the trash. The exchange is only accepting orders from those who like stocks.

On the whole, the sanctions have utterly failed to break the Russian system — because of capital controls and recurring demand for exports — the type of exports that keeps people alive.

Look out for the Ruble scheme to expand into others areas and then look for the Ruble to soar to levels thought not possible, as the Petrol-Dollar gains its first real competitor.

Comments »

BIDEN UNVEILS HISTORIC RELEASE FROM STRATEGIC PETROL RESERVE; PUTIN DEMANDS RUBLES FOR GAS

Multiple cross currents here.

Putin is demanding rubles for gas starting tomorrow and Germany is telling him to fuck off.

GERMAN FINANCE MINISTER LINDNER SAYS WE WILL CONTINUE TO PAY FOR RUSSIAN ENERGY IMPORTS IN EURO

While Biden empties America’s SPR, he’s also unveiling green solutions you fucks.

WHITE HOUSE SAYS BIDEN WILL ISSUE A DIRECTIVE, AUTHORIZING USE OF DEFENSE PRODUCTION ACT TO SECURE AMERICAN PRODUCTION OF CRITICAL MATERIALS TO BOLSTER OUR CLEAN ENERGY ECONOMY

In his head, we are done with oil and will soon survive via windmills.

Also, US policies will lead to widespread famine, notable in Africa. Very racist.

Markets don’t give a fuck. The NASDAQ is up and so are oil stocks. How do you like them apples?

Guess what?

We’re not the only fat fucks rigging stocks. Russia’s non existent ghost economy is apparently all the rage. Their markets are raping higher by 7%.

Into today I had massive exposure to oils and was certain I’d be down 5% today. I was rueing the day to come yet here I am up 1.5%, not giving a fuck about anything at all.

Comments »

The Stocklabs Trading Contest Begins Tomorrow; Cryptos on Fire

SIRS —

Tomorrow the 1st Annual Stocklabs trading contest begins. If you’re a member be sure to submit your portfolio to us in the Pelican Room. First prize winner will get $1,000 — but more than that — he’ll also get bragging rights for a millennia.

On the matter of ETH.

While it’s true, I’ve sold some the past 3 months, I Stil own more than 80% of my overall position — because of my decision to break the sales up in 12 monthly exits. That said, I will continue to unwind the position, regardless of how I feeeeeeel about the space. I am quite optimistic now, not only because of the price action, but because of seasonal factors.

The average return for Ethereum in the month of April is +48%.

To play this in the stock market, I like miners such as RIOT, MARA and maybe CLSK.

Comments »

RIGGED: US TO RELEASE ANOTHER ROUND OF SPR IN ATTEMPT TO “FIGHT INFLATION”

The last time Biden offered oil on the markets it was met with buy order, sending crude sharply higher. So he’s at it again — this time it is rumored that Biden will release an astonishing 1 million barrels of oil PER DAY for several months in an attempt to rig prices lower to reduce inflation.

The SPR is chock-filled with oil, but will be much less so after Biden reduces it by roughly 20% over the next few months.

WTI is being crucified in the AHs — off by 4%, Brent -2.7%.

We are at the stage of this “crisis” where we are to expect govt to meddle all the time, making trading inexorably harder.

NASDAQ futs are +85.

Comments »

DAY FROM HELL: THE FLY GIVES UP BIG DICKED GAINS FOR SMALL BREASTED LOSSES

(PAUSE)

I had it all figured out this morning, decadent and spoiled — accustomed to comfort. I opened up splendidly and smugly — gaining more than 2%. I fashioned myself something of a movie director, wearing French garb and smoking cigarettes through a diamond encrusted holder. I also viewed myself terrifically as a genius — world’s finest investoor — the mastermind behind iBankCoin and Stocklabs.

All of these things raced through my mind — as I posted Russian news on Twitter — and then it happened. I permitted comfort to permeate my way of life and got relaxed. I didn’t sell the things I should’ve and I began to spend in a profligate manner — and then BLACKNESS came upon me and stripped me of my comfort and I bore witness to a horrible rape — as my account went from +2.2% to down 0.3%.

While you might not consider DOWN 0.3% a disaster, I view it as an utmost CATASTROPHE and it has affected my mood and ruined my day.

All of the things I thought I was — it turned out I was not. I am a FOOL who let +200bps slip away in the blackness of the night and now I have to get batteries for my flashlight to get it all back tomorrow.

Markets closed very bogged, -175 NASDAQs with pronounced strength in commodities. However wonderful they were, the oils and all of the other great basic material plays were shot through the face today — taking yours truly to the woodshed.

Comments »