Quit Being Stoopid [sic]

Why does everyone attempt to call bottoms or tops? Every fucking time the market spikes, all the assholes come out of the woodwork, exclaiming “this is it. The bottom is in.”

Retarded analysts, like Dick Bove, make absurd market calls, emphatically declaring the bottom in banks.

Look you, it’s not important to know when the bottom is in or not. What’s vital to your account statement is the proficiency of your asset management. Instead of guessing or throwing dice at stocks, invest with caution.

For every spike in [[C]], there is a “homo hammer of death” in [[CIT]].

In my opinion, all of the headline risk is to the downside. Taking long positions is okay. Just do it in moderation and do not be tricked by the assholes who have a vested interest in getting you back to the casino.

Keep in mind, we have yet to see significant job losses. If you think times are tough now for the mortgage industry, wait until national unemployment is at 6.5%, like it is in California.

I do not have an interest in playing bounces, or 1-2 day moves. For now, I am gearing myself to take advantage of the negative headwinds. If you think about it, the only time the market spikes is when the Fed intervenes.

Eventually, the Fed halo will vanish, as it did in 2002.

In short, the volatility is insane, making it nearly impossible for neutral swing traders to make money.

With my money, until I see significant blood in the streets, not this paper cut shit, I will keep my bias to the downside.

Top pick: cash

Fuck “ag plays.” [[MOS]] will die, without honour [sic].

Continue to go about your sub-par existence.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR7QomqadJc 450 300]

Odd, no?

I’ll say it once or 93 trillion times, “The Fly” wins, often.

NOTE: Yeomps and Adam are battling it out for lesser loser.

Another financial eating pavement.

Now this market reminds me of the NYC street hustlers, who perform card tricks, such as “follow the bee.” The object of the game is to watch the street hustler shuffle three cards, right in front of you— on a milk crate, and identify the card with the bee on it—whenever he decides to stop “street shuffling.”

Ten out of ten times, you will not find the bee. However, if you are just playing for fun, with no money, often times the “kind street hustler” will let you find the bee, in order to lure you into a money game of course. The moment you put down 20 bucks, no bee.

Well, not only does this market remind me of that egregious game, it is making me want to play without money.

Seriously, over the last 4 months, I’ve made more than enough to take it easy and work on other things. There really is no point in pressing my bets, since the markets intent is to try to take my money, via shifty street hustlers.

More on this later.

Anyway, with a decent Philly Fed number, the market is, once again, melting up. As you know, this is the last trading day of the week and we are one week away from the end of q1. Basically, anticipate a lot of window dressing and foolishness.

Take some profits and walk away from the milk carton.

Ever so quietly, the Chinese stock market has crashed!

UPDATE: For those of you who like March Madness bullshit, go join Dpeezy’s (King of the PG) iBC tourney.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcHbUp1Nq6U 450 300]

Long live DMX.

The silence from the CNBC hatfuckers is deafening. No more Charlie rumors or Cramer bottom calls, just plain ol’ vanilla murder.

As you know, “The Fly” was early to short the “ag plays.” Quite frankly, I spit on “global growth” and demand from China and India. Anyway, as a result of my time machine investing style, I was up 8.1% today.

That’s right. In one day, I just murdered your entire YTD returns. With today’s gain, I’m pushing on 40%. Keep in mind, we are talking a lot of money here, not your bullshit 5 figure e-trade account.

All day, rumors were rampant, regarding [[MER]] fuckery. There is massive put buying taking place and the stock is out of control down.

With my money, I want to lean on weak banks/asset managers here. My short list includes: [[FED]], [[DSL]], [[CLMS]], [[MER]], [[WM]] and [[LEH]].

I’ll have you know, LEH trades to the 20’s, short term.

Finally, with clearing firms demanding less leverage at hedge funds, get short the ag and oil sector. All of those hedge fund idiots have been long [[POT]], [[MOS]], [[CF]], [[MON]], [[DE]], [[AG]], [[BG]], [[XOM]], [[SLB]], [[COP]], just to name a few. They have “ag plays” coming out of their ears.

The sell off in commodity related stocks has just begun. To hedge my short bets, I’m long [[DGP]].

It appears the “clams” from Calamos are in deep shit, via auction rate securities.

In other auction news:

via Briefing.com 

Odd, no?