Going Higher Because it’s Fun

So you know, I locked HORATIO CLAWHAMMER in a closet lined with lead, in order to have a little fun, playing the long side for a trade. As you know, I only bought two positions, PCR and NSM, mainly because I find it difficult to get knee deep here, AFTER missing out on the most awesomeness run in the history of equity markets.

And, also, I think stocks are for dipshits and shall/will trade lower, eventually.

However, providing the trannies keep going higher, I am comfortable with a few longs.

For the love of global warming a dead polar bears, I am about to get heavy into this market and need to feel out what might work or fuck me. So, in the meantime, you can just sit there, like the sad sack of shit that you are, and simply wait, mind you, for “The Fly” to offer cogent guidance.

I bought 2,000 NSM @ $10.75.

I bought 2,000 PCR @ $13.56.

I’d like to buy some FAZ or SRS down here, but the wretched transports are up too much. I have assets available to trade, namely my own personal accounts and intend on expressing myself, via a buy or sell, later on today.

On one hand, commercial Re names, my favorite to hate, are sucking the tits of Mars, if there is such a thing. Some of my least beloved names, ACC, HME, WRI and MAC look like shit. However, simultaneously, stocks like FDX, HPQ and BNI give you -6%+ gdp lovers hope.

On the long side, stocks like MU, WNR, SUN or PCR look advantageous, for a trade.

In short, if you are thinking about shorting this market, hold your horses. In the meantime, behold the greatness of a -6%+ GDP revival!

While some take exception to the United States leveraging its GDP by 25% on asshole bailouts, most of you are gleefully skiing up slope to stock market utopia.

Remember back in the old days of three weeks ago, when the world was about to bust open and all banks were considered “retard boxes”? Those were the days; and how do I miss them.

Good Scott, in a matter of three weeks, everything has changed. Majestically, the economy has healed, led by robust phantom earnings at the banks and the prospects of hyper inflation. Indeed, we are building ourselves a fine foundation for sustainable growth. All praise and respect goes out to President Obama for constructing such a divine plan.

Now, we’ve been at this point, amidst the numerous bear market rallies of 2008, and you know what to do: take profits.

Listen to me now, thank me later: take profits.

I am not saying to load up on FAZ to SRS or one of my special “fuck you, you’re dead” REIT short ideas of decadence and debauchery.The prudent investor will size this rally up, give it a quick glance over, and sell it 10 ways till Sunday.

The time for rainbow colored hair and shrimp cocktail fights are over. You need to plan for the end of the world. As sure as I am sitting here, it is going to explode into small pieces and crash into the sun.

Trade accordingly.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DphkDgAMKqY&feature=related 450 300]

I am glad to not be invested right now. Somehow, someway, the stocks Gods protect Senor Tropicana from certain death, on a regular basis. I am man enough to say, had I been invested today, I would have lost money. But I didn’t!

That must vex many or most of you.

I know, there are lots of opportunities abound and folks here are banking coin, at a criminal rate, crucifying the shorts.

Consider this run a head start, for you retard pig masters. While SKF depreciates at an absurd rate, my vantage point gets masterful.

I appreciate the work Ragin’ has put into iBC, as of late. When it comes to playing bull runs, no one is better than good ol’ RC. You should be reading him, especially when I am on ice.

Anyway, it’s good to see the majority of you making some coin here— long. It will even better to see most of you surrender such said gains to HORATIO CLAWHAMMER, within the next week.

I could not have worded it better myself.

Also, check out the “Tampa agent” at 2:03. That is a man with class.

I know you are PERMABULLISH, based upon ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, other than sentiment. However, keep an open mind to the fact that you are an imbecilic idiot, preordained to live the life of a simple man.

Short sales in ACC, HME, WRI, MAC, RIG and PACW are looking mighty agreeable right now. Why don’t you lick the BBQ sauce off your southern fingers and come on over to the dark side?

Motherfuckers, there is no reason to be nice to any of you, since you question my every move. For the love of guns and drugs, you ingrates even critique my cash position with idiotic quotes of UUP, as if that means anything.

Then, in your warped minds, somehow, you believe I am here to serve you with stock picks. You further the argument by suggesting “the site will die, w/o Godly stock picks daily.” Listen up here, asshole, I could blog about evening dinner wear or the magical innovation of automobile mufflers and still get more hits than 99% of you clown fuckers.

THE FLY IS MORE THAN STOCKS. HE IS BIGGER.

With that in mind, I have no advice for you, nor would I consider giving you any. You are, without a doubt, undeserving of an afternoon cup of tea.

No point of me keeping the charade up any longer. People, I am besides myself, missing out on the God of all rallies, Sultan of all squeezes, King of all boomshackalackas. Saying “I don’t care about the market going up 5% per day, because I’m a dick and that’s life,” is a minor embellishment, if I might be so truthful as to say so.

While it’s true, I have no lost one wooden nickle, after locking in 25% (ytd) gains; it vexes me to no end to see pricks like you make coin, trading the easiest tape known to the Universe, while I sit here chomping on sandwiches.

So you know, literally, I cannot trade, since my accounts are in transit. I will leave it at that, regarding my career move.

On top of that, I am dealing with insane people, who are more apt to dealing with moonshine distillers, than men of industry, such as myself.

Anyway, despite the market spiking, Commercial Re is still weak. Had any of you listened to what I was saying, short ACC, HME and RIG, during yesterday’s fuckfest, you’d be up today. So, quit spreading urban legends that “The Fly” has been wrong.

“The Fly” is NEVER wrong, even when he is wrong, if you know what I mean. I said we’d hold this rally until May. Thus far, that looks like a promising scenario.

Also, by the way, Senor Tropicana is about to advance to the next round in iBankcoin’s Final Four contest.

Don’t fuck with me.