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Dr. Fly

18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.

Hedge or Die

Once again, the market proves it is being run by homos in florescent yellow jumpsuits, no offense to gay guys, of course.

At the moment, I am 65% long, 40% short and -5% cash. Much to my delight, my inverses are more than making up for my longs. I bought more [[FXP]] , [[DUG]] , [[EEV]] and a little [[REW]] . Also, to hedge against my National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] long, I sold short Transocean Inc. [[RIG]] .

The market cannot defeat me. “The Fly” is always two steps ahead of Mother Market (bitch), and one slice of pizza away from killing his trader/servant. Let me tell you, that fucker has been making trading error after trading error. It has gotten to a point where it is almost comical. If he was trading with monopoly or confederate money, I’d be balling on the floor, laughing out loud, as if the tickle monster had attacked me.

For all of you bull fuckers:

You will die soon. The market spits on your kind and will eventually thorw all of you into murder holes.

With my money, I’ll give the long side one more day. If the market dives lower on Monday, I will blow out of these fuckers and bet heavy on China shitting the shower.

Always a high percentage play.

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Tricked

I thought we’d have a follow through rally today. Silly me, I forgot that we were in a fucking black hole, which is sucking civilization and all of its furniture into it. Poof, gone!

I am flattening out my portfolio to put me on a hamster wheel to nowhere. Of course I am loading up on [[FXP]] . I told you last night that I would.

Look you, if you’ve been reading my blog for more than a year, you should know how I think by now. You don’t need me to tell you: “hey asshole, yesterday was a trick, get short.”

Yes it sucks being whipsawed; but it’s part of the game.

In short, I have not sold any longs. I took my 15% cash and just dumped it all into [[FXP]] . Fuck it. And, I will use a little leverage to buy more, if needed.

UPDATE: I sold short 3,000 Transocean Inc. [[RIG]] @ $72, to hedge my National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] position.

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Asia Yawns at Wall Streets Circle Jerk

If Asian markets do not rally by 5% or more tonight, I am loading up on [[FXP]] in the morning and taking profits on some of the longs I bought this afternoon.

Thus far, the reaction in Asia has been muted, up between 2-4%.

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Epic Reversal

It’s rather fitting, isn’t it? Immediately following my end of the world “C You Later” post, the market ripped higher.

Before I go over my day, understand, the trades that I made today are not representative of my macro feelings on the economy. Eventually, we’re screwed. However, it’s the fear of eating a 1,000 point rally that forces me to cover shorts and get long. Everything I bought today is a piece of shit. However, I must go long, in order to ride out this short squeeze. Being up 75% year to date is no accident.

“The Fly” is a stock market God.

Basically, I started selling my inverse etf’s during George Bush’s speech. I knew the market would not go lower, after recovering from a 300 point deficit. I also knew, people like to sell on Bush’s speeches. So, I used that weakness to sell [[REW]] , [[EEV]] , [[DUG]] and cover my Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] short.

Unfortunately, I kept my [[FXP]] position and was deballed for doing so. But, in order to take advantage of the squeeze, I hopped into my time machine and went long egregious amounts of [[UYM]] , [[ROM]] , National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] .

The one thing that hurt was covering that HK short, after adding to it intra-day. I ate an intra-day loss of 2 bucks, but made money from my initial cost basis.

Basically, the text book says we rally until Thanksgiving. However, do not expect another 600 point day. Milk the rally as best as you can; but turn on it when it looks best.

At the close, I still have very minor positions in [[DUG]] , [[EEV]] and [[SDS]] . And, I own a decent amount of [[FXP]] . Overall, I am 65% long, 15% short and 20% in cash.

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Fuck This

I had enough. I am booking profits on some inverses and upping some of my longs.

UPDATE: I cleaned out my [[EEV]] , [[REW]] and 2/3rds of my [[DUG]] positions. I kept [[FXP]] , [[SDS]] and my Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] shorts.

In addition, I loaded up on [[ROM]] and [[UYM]] . There is a good chance this rally may stick.

UPDATE II: I am not net long. I sold enough of my inverses and bought some 200% upsides to get me flat. However, my largest position, by far, is cash. I haven’t calculated yet, but I’m sure it’s more than 30%.

UPDATE III: I’m throwing dice down, getting net long, buying National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and covering some of my [[HK]] short.

UPDATE IV: I covered my entire [[HK]] short. And, I loaded up on The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] .

Currently, I am 60% long, 20% short and 20% cash.

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C You Later

Get ready for a Citigroup Inc. [[C]] crisis. With the stock knifing lower, sub $10, and credit default swaps through the roof, prepare for talks of a Citibank bankruptcy.

Fuck, right away, I will wire my money out of that shitbox, back into my JPMorgan Chase & Co. [[JPM]] account.

The rally, which was made from marshmallows and goose down feathers, has failed. Now, we’re coming for that transvestites (Art Hogan) bottom call, around 7,800.

Here we come you cockless bastard!

As an aside, I am thinking about covering some of my shorts tomorrow. I can see the market crashing here and knifing lower tomorrow morning, then bounce. Boing!

Until then, I will enjoy the bloodshed, from the luxury of my short positions, much to Tim Knight’s chagrin.

UPDATE: I sold short 5,000 Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] @ $14.50

UPDATE:
I bought 10,000 [[UYM]] @ $14.89. And, I am selling my [[REW]] position, north of $133.

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I Have Many Enemies

Most of these men have deformed faces and reside from the darkest, sewage infested, corners of the Earth. They wear shirts made from burlap and pants made from velcro. They drink tea, made from wild gypson plants and eat the flesh of domesticated hamsters.

I fight these people every day. “The Fly” is a beacon of truth in a world filled with unsavory liars, who would slit the throats of elderly people in wheeled chairs, in order to take their food stamps or take the rubber off of their wheeled chairs.

I have fought many battles and seen many things; but none as hideous and monstrous as the cretins who circle the wagons of truth on the internet.

These men are heathens of the lowest order, unable to discern a bar of soap from a bowl of strawberry jelly.

So, when you are over there, in the discomfort of your bullshit pleather chair from Staples, just know, “The Fly” is in the trenches, having a good ol’ time tossing nuclear bomb grenades back and forth with gargoyles.

Top Pick: short Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]]

UPDATE:

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QszCXHDsZNM 450 300]

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Trust Nothing

Sometime soon, we will get a nice rally in the market. However, I will not bet big on it. If anything, I’ll trade small and try to scalp a little. Basically, oil is leading the market by the nose. I do not trust oil. I think it’s in freefall mode and whoever is trying to bottom fish will get his/her respective faces ripped off.

Right out the gates, I see Chinese stocks are up, which is punishing my [[FXP]] . Normally, I’d buy the dip right away. But, being 80% short, my position is to cover my shorts on dips, not add to them on spikes. With the 10% cash I have left, I will use it for an emergency situation, such as: “OMG, FXP is down $20, what will I do”?

The market is made from marshmallows and goose down feathers. The bulls are weak bitches, hung over from doing diluted lines of blow the night before.

As you know, “The Fly” has some pretty sizable positions in [[REW]] , [[EEV]] , [[FXP]] , [[SDS]] and short Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] . I’ll have you know, in addition to you already knowing, I intend to sell my inverses and cover my HK short at more advantageous prices that what my screen is registering now—as a point in fact, unbeknownst to many of you.

So, with that in mind, I will have a looksy over the market, and get a buy list ready, for when the market is ready to bounce. Just know, we are not bouncing today.

No Sir. We shall first taste the infamous “Art Hogan” bottom, prior to any sustainable uptick.

ROFL UPDATE: “Our children will remember Hank Paulson.”

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRdZghb0Y8o 450 300]

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