NOTHING CAN STOP ME; BOUGHT $ZS

I was in cash for a few hours, and then the market rallied, so I bought ZS. My thought process is simple, a mockery of the thinking man. I wanted out, so now I’m back in. In my head, I’ve already gone to cash, so by buying after doing so, I am conducting a Costanza trade — doing the exact opposite. Ergo, I cannot lose — since my losing streak was at 3 and all of the haters are back and strong in the comments and on Twitter.

This singular stock will serve as a missile, aiming directly for their giant faggot faces — blowing them out of the water.

You will see. Markets want higher. President Trump won the trade wars again. I cannot lose.

Long ZS.

Developing…

Oh, BTW, get yourselves some HUBS while you’re at it.

Today’s opening tick pushed several of my stocks below the threshold from which I can no longer bear witness and do nothing. I sold AERI, UXIN, and DOCU — all for losses. In the case of UXIN, a horrendous loss of 15% — stacking up my recent trading prowess to nothing short of garbage can tier.

Additionally, I made a slew of changes to the Quant fund, but more or less, many of the constituents remains the same. I’m not done buying, and will complete the fund by the end of day.

Back to the subject of my horrible positions: they’re mostly higher today, after I sold the losers. It’s always nice seeing that, like a fake diamond ring set in a lovely platinum ring. The only other stock in my ownership sharply lower today is DOMO — but I’m holding it because it’s back to where I bought it. I merely squandered that trade, not something to lament until I sell it at a loss.

Markets don’t look half bad; but don’t take my word for it — have a look at the internals.

Well, I ought to be going now. I’m working on a new streak, one filled exclusively with losses. My cash position is healthy, but my brain isn’t cock-strong yet, so I’ll probably parlay until I get my mojo back. This is standard operating procedure for me, having gone from the hottest trader in the history of the world, to one unable to trade PG and HSY right. ‘Tis is my curse, the fate of an extreme artist who moves with passion and inspiration — checked only by his own hubris and bouts of stupidity diving headlong into giant pools filled with nothing other than cement blocks.

I woke up to the coyote snapping her teeth in my face and then futures down 150. When I was a young boy growing up in the sewers of Brooklyn, I always dreamed of an adult life exactly like this — picking up steaming piles of shit whilst futures for my stock holdings tanked. I remember vividly a time when I felt dogs were a scourge on the planet, now I own two.

I also remember a time when stocks were good. Heck, when I traded 34 for 35 stocks in a row successfully in June, I felt rather invincible — strong and ram-headed — living life like a fucking lamb with its head out of the window — zero fucks or cares — shitting on your front lawn. All of that hubris has changed, and I can’t say that I am surprised by this morning’s headlines — for we all knew Trump was going to ‘rattle some cages’ and fuck with everyone.

This morning’s headlines:

Worldwide retaliation for US tariffs kicked in on Sunday, putting a ‘bull’s-eye’ on wide range of goods
The Trump administration reportedly drafted a bill that abandons WTO rulebook
EU reportedly warns of new tariffs worth $300 billion if Trump targets automakers

It’s time to stop out of stocks and head to the fucking beach, before things get really ugly and you’re a loser again with an account balance at zero.

On the quant side, I’ll abide by the rules and invest the money regardless of my feelings. It’s a long term oriented account, not beholden to weak and fat feelings driven by hunches.

European markets are off by 0.8% and our glorious Nasdaq is heading down 45 at the open.

Oh, and TSLA is busting loose by 6% on better than expected production numbers. It’s so funny to watch Musk bowl on you ass-clowns attempting to doubt his Einstein. He’s smarter than you — you cannot win. Same rules apply to me — smarter — you can never win.

Anyone making a livable wage on Wall Street is en route towards vacation right now. They’re hopping on planes towards Europe, helicopters towards the Hamptons, or in a car with a pocket square and gold buttons trailblazing towards Nantucket. What’s left are loserFAGS, pikers, retail, and you — the unwashed trade pleb — trying extra hard to make it big and make a fortune.

I’ll be here too, shit posting and trying to recapture the glory I enjoyed in early June — yelling and cursing the whole way when things start to go sideways on me.

For the month of June, the Exodus Quant shed 0.41%, in line with the SPY. I will be investing in the small caps again, as it was the only quintile up for the month. Everything else was down and down stupidly. There’s no point trying to fight against the degeneracy, so I’ll join it.

My gold position will be culled, replaced by bonds.

Futures are higher and I am seriously sleep deprived. I endued a weekend of road trips, cheap food, and stale cigars. Last night I nearly drank myself retarded on spritzers, the very thing I hate.

Life is a journey. Somedays I feel like a warrior champion, the next a muppet inside of a fucking ‘fagbox.’

Ciao.

I have several things to do throughout the balance of today. In the meantime, chew on this — our top rated big capped stocks. The ranking system is very sensitive to technicals and change in a blink of an eye. Oil opens down on Monday, next thing you know these fucking scores go sideways, tanking their ranking to the bottom of the heap.

I’ll have you know, utilizing our suite of Sharpe ratio tools is an effective way of gauging the technicals of a stocks on a longer term basis — so use that shit when you’re cobbling together your idiotic investment plans. For the life of me, I haven’t the slightest idea how people send you money. If they only knew what I knew — you’re a complete slack-jawed idiot.

Ok, got to run now.

Ciao.

I’ll do the numbers tomorrow, but it looks like the Exodus Quant fell in line with the SPY last month, long small cap stocks between the market caps $1-5b. It has been long small caps for 3 months and this strategy has proved to be a profitable one, higher by 9% for the year.

Over the past week, however, mega cap stocks have shredded small caps and the margin of outperformance is very small now, between small and large. There is a chance Exodus will reposition out of small and into large.

If you’re just reading me for the first time today, I have a quantitative method by which I invest the majority of my money — using fundamental analysis, using my investment software. I position in the very best companies, graded by my algorithms, 2 stocks per sector, and I do it with a smile and a listless care in the world.

During the week, in order to satiate my desire for craven madness, I trade with fellow lunatics inside The Pelican Room. There, my winship is performed unbridled, and unmatched. But there are times when I do not do well, such as the week that just passed. My methods are momentum based, so when markets are reverting to the mean, I sometimes get fucked. The key, of course, is to cut out the losses quickly, something that I’ve been dreadful at, historically, but have been getting better at.

I have a thing to go to this morning, lasting thru the afternoon. This being the weekend before July 4th, I gather many of you flagFAGS will pretend to be patriotic and use that excuse to get drunk, or stoned, or utilize whatever vice you deem appropriate. I, on the other hand, will be working hard, like Clubber Lang in the gym when Rocky was rolling in the grass with his wife and flowers, figuring out methods and ways to up my performance — preparing for the week ahead.

How else do you expect me to get ahead in this fucking rat race of a life, an existence marked by the things gathered and collected over a lifetime, experiences enjoyed, positions of power wielded? It’s not all shit, believe me. There is beauty in all things, or at least most, you only have to look at and examine the smallest of details to appreciate how fortunate we are to be here, running in the race, trying like mad fools to attain a semblance of calm and happiness.

Have a great Saturday.

What a fucking fagroll into the bell. All of the momo stocks were eviscerated into the bell. My ZUO and PVTL got fucking poleaxed. All in all, this was a reversion to the mean week for me. All of my recent success has been checked this week, as I took one tumble down the stairs after the next.

It’s hard to describe how these streaks come and go; but when they go — they really do go.

The only silver lining for the day was CBLK and DOMO.

Markets barely traded up and if there was another 10 minutes of trade, we’d be down.

My quant finished up 20bps for the day and to be honest, I don’t even want to think about stocks anymore. I’ll regroup and come back on Monday with a sharp mind and cock made of steel. Enjoy the weekend and be sure to drink recklessly and also smoke a lot.

You are men, after all — act like one.

I really don’t learn my lesson. I bought this UXIN Chinese shit yesterday and have been getting my balls boxed in ever since. I am up on another one of my IPO purchases, IIIV — but give it some time; perhaps it too can box me in.

So now I stepped in and bought DOMO. Reason being: I’m retarded. I like SAAS companies that grow fast and are trading mid 20s. They always seem to go to $30, at least that’s the prevailing trend for the moment.

I stepped in and bought it, even though it’s way up, and I don’t give a shit what you think.

I sold my hedges for breakeven — both LABD and SRTY served their purpose in assuaging my fears. I also bought a new IPO, IIIV. It’s a very thinly traded stocks, so be careful about placing large market orders for the shares.

The way I see this market is very clear and beautiful: nothing can stop it.

Sure, the recent losses will serve as a dampener for some shares and things will take time to get back to crazy — but we’ll get there.

For now, I remain, inexorably, bullish.

Take a look at my runners screen in Exodus — stocks within 1% of their intra-day high, up 2% or more for the session.

Top picks: CBLK, ZUO, MDB

What a lovely morning. I woke up to my coyote snapping her teeth in my face again. I ventured off outside half awake and she nearly tore my arm from my socket after seeing a family of nice deer on my lawn. The Mother deer, seemingly frightened half to death at the specter of seeing a fucking coyote steam out of a human house, stepped forward to face her in final combat, before my coyote got to eat her and all of her children.

Lucky for the nice family of deer, who were all very thin and perfect, I directed my coyote towards the trees and the bushes, to chase after the fox and the squirrels instead.

Nasdaq futures are +37 and that’s incredible because Trump, reportedly, want to remove the US from the WTO.

Axios is reporting that Trump has told several top White House officials he wants to withdraw the United States from the WTO.

“He’s [threatened to withdraw] 100 times. It would totally [screw] us as a country,” one source told the media outlet. The same source said Trump has told his advisors, “We always get f—ed by them [the WTO]. I don’t know why we’re in it. The WTO is designed by the rest of the world to screw the United States.”

This is like a finance version of Bush’s ‘you’re either with us or against us’ approach to diplomacy. Unfortunately, Twitter wasn’t around back in those early days and none of us were able to properly mock Bush. But now with Trump, we are very much afforded that luxury.

Banks are super strong this morning following the Fed permitting banks to return capital to shareholders. We’re finally getting back to normal, a period in time when the banksters will be able to wantonly approve of loans to homeless people in exchange for big fat bonuses and fees for doing God’s work.

Off to run an errand. Here are this morning’s movers.