18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
17,101 Blog Posts

Stars Wars The Last Jedi Review: A Ridiculous Exercise in Absurdity

I had the fine opportunity to see the latest Star Wars this evening. We had a nice dinner before the show and made it to the theatre a solid 30 minutes before showing. After loading up on a healthy amount of popped corn and bottled waters, we entered an already packed theatre filled with fan boys/girls adorned in Star Wars pajamas and Jedi costumes.

Before the movie started, our AMC theatre aired the most absurd and poorly made movie trailers in the history of cinema. It was one eye roller after the next; and that feeling spilled into the featured presentation, which began, cornily, and continued to spew out one canned cliche after the next until the movie’s uninteresting climax.

I don’t want to give away spoilers here, but I can comfortably say this is the very worst Stars Wars movie of all time. The acting performed by Luke Skywalker, him and his broken man role, was both lazy and asinine.

Kylo Ren and Rey are both talented actors, but their roles and scripts left much to be desired.

God damn it, the entire plot was festooned with flaws and preposterous plot twists that I’d expect to see in a Disney made for teevee movie, not a blockbuster film with an unlimited budget. Even the CGI was weak and flimsy, creating an atmosphere of subhuman qualities in a franchise that is supposed to be the gold standard in America cinema.

By the way, having Kylo Ren not wear his mask the entire movie was a mistake of epic proportions. Then again, whoever made this movie are complete imbeciles, unable to determine the difference between interesting and lame.

Don’t even get me started on the ending scene with the boy and his stupid broom, gazing out into the sky with his idiotic crackerjack ring glowing for reasons unbeknownst to anyone.

One thing is certainly clear: whoever wrote this movie was on drugs, or is simply an untalented wench who should be fired from modern cinema and perhaps take up occupation in a traveling carnivale to spend the rest of his days juggling cans of flammable jugs that might oneway detonate and incinerate him into dust from which he came.

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Slowly Moving to Cash, Very Quietly

A little FYI for you ball handlers out there, I’m doing the very last of free trials this week for Exodus and might never give you folks a free trial again, for as long as I live. Point in fact, once my advisory firm is up and running, I might just take Exodus under and private — casting all of you out into the cold dirt to lament and wonder about the future.

I sold out of GROW today for a 3 day 23% gain. Also, I sold WLK for the hundy roll that I promised.

Over the next two weeks, volume will crawl to a standstill and people will begin getting drunk — in earnest — instead busy with shopping for presents and end of year festivities. I expect markets to CRASH through the floorboards starting January, as a penance of sort of a certain D.J. Trump for bragging about its never-ending gains, in light of his ruinous first year in office. I intend to keep blogging like the wind; but I have to go now because I am going to see an early showing of Star Wars this evening.

UPDATE: I sold XNET for +20%.

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The FCC Will Repeal Net Neutrality Today

I’m mixed on this topic. On one hand, whenever I see absolute scum in the streets protesting something, my spidey senses kick in and force me to take the opposite position. Also, my kids came home yesterday and starting spewing a bunch of talking points they read on their Instagram feeds, which was without a doubt pushed by propagandists.

As far as I can tell, this takes the power away from the dictators at Facebook, Google, and Netflix and hands said power to the corporate giants at Verizon, Comcast, and other service providers. From my vantage point, I do not view the current hegemony as pro free speech. In fact, I believe FB, GOOG, and TWTR to be very authoritarian in the manner they censor speech. Ergo, I have zero empathy for anything that hurts them.

The FCC is going to repeal net neutrality rules today and there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s their pipes and infrastructure. They should have more control, not the gargoyles at Google.

Pai’s proposal marks a victory for big internet service providers such as AT&T Inc, Comcast Corp and Verizon Communications Inc that opposed the rules and gives them sweeping powers to decide what web content consumers can get. It is a setback for Google parent Alphabet Inc and Facebook Inc, which had urged Pai not to rescind the rules.

Michael Powell, a former FCC chairman who heads a trade group representing major cable companies and broadcasters, told reporters that internet providers would not block content because it would not make economic sense and consumers would not stand for it.

“They make a lot of money on an open internet,” Powell said, adding it is “much more profitable” than a closed system. “This is not a pledge of good-heartedness, it’s a pledge in the shareholders’ interest.”

Democrats have said the absence of rules would be unacceptable and that they would work to overturn the proposal if it is approved. Advocates of the net neutrality rules also plan a legal challenge.

Pai’s proposal is “like letting the bullies develop their own playground rules,” said Senator Ed Markey, a Massachusetts Democrat.

Many Republicans back Pai’s proposal but want Congress to write net neutrality rules. Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said the FCC would “return the internet to a consumer-driven marketplace free of innovation-stifling regulations.”

A group of nearly 20 state attorneys general asked the FCC to delay the vote until the issue of fake comments is addressed.

I’m open minded. Tell me why I should side with the scum in the streets and fight for Google?

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Jim Chanos Reminds People Why He Hates Tesla

Chanos has been so wrong on Tesla and for so long, I think he’s starting to lose his mind. After all, what’s not to like about Tesla?

Look at those revenues. Beautiful yes?

Now here’s the losses.


At the heart of his short selling thesis is the fact that Tesla cannot book a profit and also, and perhaps most importantly, there is significant competition coming for Tesla in 2019, in the form of a Porsche electric sports car. Makes sense, right?

Valuation wise, the stock hasn’t been this cheap, on a price to sales basis, in years. The stock is up 58% in 2017.

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Morning Poppers (The Ride Continues Edition)

Crypto market cap is $511 billion this morning and people long Bitcoin cash and Bitcoin gold are 20% better than they were yesterday. You just know the valuation is going to $1 trillion. Believe me, I know a thing or two about euphoria and this time isn’t different; but it sure is fun watching this unfold.

At the present, futures are sharply higher and we’re heading towards another leg up in a sea of endless legs up. Sharpe ratios are comfortably above 3 and your advisors are all geniuses, in spite of the fact that they haven’t the slightest idea what they’re doing. Alas, the market is doing it for them and they were patient enough to see it through, so you might as well send them another referral or two.

Meanwhile, here’s some other headlines for this morning’s perusal.

Summary of current Conference Committee tax reform bill Part 1 (based on news reports) — Final bill due out Friday — Votes set for next week

Wynn Resorts target raised to $180 from $155 at Barclays

Verizon downgraded to Hold from Buy at HSBC Securities

Micron target raised to $54 from $52 at MKM Partners

Under Armour target raised to $12 from $11 at Deutsche Bank; Sell

Foot Locker target raised to $49 from $45 at Deutsche Bank

First Solar resumed with a Neutral at BofA/Merrill; tgt $70

BioMarin Pharm upgraded to Outperform from Neutral at Wedbush

Spark Therapeutics downgraded to Neutral from Buy at Goldman; tgt lowered to $58 from $106

GW Pharma upgraded to Buy from Neutral at Goldman

Valeant Pharma downgraded to Underweight from Neutral at JP Morgan

lululemon athletica upgraded to Buy from Hold at Deutsche Bank

ConocoPhillips upgraded to Buy from Neutral at Goldman

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A Christmas Miracle: Exodus Flash Trials

Feeling in the festive mood, I thought now would be a fine time to give some of you wall-sitters a peak inside the hallowed halls of Exodus. In case you’ve never seen them, they are gilded and grand and everything you’ve ever wanted in a market intelligence platform, befitted with the very best mean reversion algorithms and community who steadfastly pursues profitable trades on a daily basis.

Trials will end Friday. For access, all you have to do is email me at [email protected] dot com.

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The Fed Raises Rates Again and Have Done a Masterful Job in 2017

I must admit, I did not think the Fed would be able to get away with hiking rates without there being adverse consequences. Let’s all acknowledge some plain facts. The Fed did in 2017 what many believed to be impossible. They got rates off the ground of zero to 1.25-1.5% without a ripple in stocks. In the past, the idea of even thinking about hiking rates would cause a market hysteria. Do you remember those days?

Now the Fed is in a position to both unwind their balance sheet and hike rates, all the while the economy is chugging along at a 3% rate.

Dare I say, best case scenario is at hand?

From their statement today.

“This change highlights that the committee expects the labor market to remain strong, with sustained job creation, ample opportunities for workers and rising wages,” Chair Janet Yellen told reporters Wednesday in Washington following the decision. In her final scheduled press conference before before stepping down on Feb. 3, Yellen also said she would do her utmost to ensure a smooth transition to her nominated successor, Jerome Powell.

And their dot plot.

Forget about Obama and Trump. Global markets have been guided by the steady hand of Fed Chairs Bernanke and Yellen since 2008 and I think it’s only fair and right that someone gave them their due.

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Ken Fisher Warns: Bitcoin Has Surpassed All Previous Bubbles in Terms of Price Movement

“It is Netscape” during the dot com bliss, says increasingly nervous man with a hand gesture disorder.

Meanwhile, Monaco is higher by another 9%, up $4 from where I discussed it earlier this week. I think we can all agree, there needs to be some level of clarity into what in the hell is going on here. Even Ken ‘Hands’ Fisher is completely ignorant to “the bitcoin” and merely scoffs at it as the bubble to end all bubbles.

Here’s how Bitcoin stacks up against previous bubbles.

Should you be afraid? Yes and no. On one hand, you should be cognizant to the notion that prices will pull back. In order to have a good market, the plebs need to be removed from their coin. Sorry, that’s just the way speculation works, cryptos are no different. On the other, the ICO market is providing vigor into a funding market that might produce some really good companies, assets that would’ve normally sought out funding from VCs and then IPO very late stage and burn investors to death. In the ICO world, there’s a good chance you might be able to snag something really good; but you have to understand the relationship between owning their coins or tokens is totally different from shares, which is where the confusion arises.

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$HMNY Shareholders Pornographically Violated After Company Massively Dilutes Base

Well I said this was a zero or 10x. Right now it’s looking like the former.

This is a kitchen sink financing, a solid 40% below yesterday’s closing price and well below the 20 day average price. They’re raising $60m to stem the burn and they simply do not care about the stock price right now.

Shares are off by 35%.

Helios & Matheson prices 8,261,539 units (w/ each unit consisting of one common stock, one Series A warrant, and series B warrants) at $6.50/unit

Co announced the pricing of a best efforts underwritten public offering of an aggregate of 8,261,539 Series A units, with each Series A Unit consisting of (i) one share of the Company’s common stock, par value $0.01 per share, and (ii) one Series A Warrant to purchase one share of Common Stock; and (B) 969,230 Series B units , with each Series B Unit consisting of (i) one pre-funded Series B Warrant to purchase one share of Common Stock and (ii) one Series A Warrant, with anticipated gross proceeds of ~$60 mln, before deducting underwriting discounts and commissions and estimated offering expenses payable by HMNY

I’m HODLing this one.

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Apple Provides Welfare for Finisar, Invests $390 into Company to Ramp Up Production of Chips

Money can do wonders for people, in this case Apple. They could easily buy FNSR and keep operations humming along; but they’d rather just throw some cash at them in order to keep manufacturing going at a steady pace instead of having to deal with managing a poorly run company.

Apple this morning announced the second investment from its $1 billion Advanced Manufacturing Fund, committing $390 million to Finisar.

As a result, Finisar will transform a shuttered, 700,000-square-foot manufacturing plant in Sherman, Texas, into a high-tech facility developing VCSEL (vertical-cavity surface-emitting laser) chips. These chips enable depth and proximity sensing, helping to power some of Apple’s new features including Face ID, Animoji, and ARKit, which is the set of tools that allow developers to create augmented reality apps.

There are three VCSELs in every iPhone X. VCSEL chips also are used in Apple’s AirPods.

The new facility is expected to open in the second half of next year.

“VCSELs power some of the most sophisticated technology we’ve ever developed and we’re thrilled to partner with Finisar over the next several years to push the boundaries of VCSEL technology and the applications they enable,” Jeff Williams, Apple’s Chief Operating Officer, said in a statement.

Jerry Rawls, Finisar’s CEO, added, “When you combine our proven ability to consistently manufacture exceptional products with our new state-of-the-art Sherman facility, we’re confident we can achieve our shared goal of providing consumers with incredibility exciting features.”

Apple’s investment will also create more than 500 jobs at the new Sherman facility including engineers, technicians and maintenance teams.

Literally welfare.

Shares of FNSR are higher by 27% in the pre-market and we down 36% for the year before this news hit.

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