I’m Old School

I started finance blogging back in 2006, at FlyonWallStreet, where I earned the name “The Fly.” Back then, I had a lot of shit to say, particularly with four letter words. There weren’t any finance bloggers who talked like me back then because bloggers were pussies. In the real world, people who manage money have disgusting, filthy, mouths, cussing at old ladies in wheeled chairs and spitting at the homeless. But somehow, someway, when these charlatans made it online, their salesmen hats went on and they became very prim and proper, coming across as bland, rigid, checkered pants republicans (no Savage).

I revolutionized this blog game, spawning off dozens of copy cats and countless others who mimic me on Twitter.

The reason for the redesign.

The previous web design was beautiful. I loved the black, glassy, look, with background images to match. I liked the format, but quickly despised it for a specific reason. My crew, the elite tabbed blogger apparatus, the all-star squad of staff writers, drowned under the volume of the purblind. Since it was sorted by chronological order, more than ninety percent of the content published under the old design was indeud penned by gorillas with half eaten bananas on their desks, and NOT my staff writers.

At the annual iBC dinner, their discontent was aired and I have responded in kind.

Effective immediately, we are now in the year 2006 and you are enjoying the new design, whether you like it or not. Although you never imagined that orange was for you, it is now your favorite color–next to white and wheat. I am sensitive to no one and will not bend, with regards to living in the past. Back then, things were simpler. Twitter wasn’t even around and Facebook was having its dick cut off by Myspace.

However, if the white is too harsh on your old man eyes, I can have VINCENZO ILLUMINATI (world famous IT specialist) tone it down a little.

As an aside, I am up more than 2% this morning, led by fantastic gains in CTRP, DMND and EXK.

Old school.

NOTE: If you were too lazy to click on the link above, this is what the old site looked like. Odd, no? VIZ.

Will the silver stocks, led by the good Senator from Kentucky–JAKEGINT–shoot for the stars or fall under the weight of their own hubris, yet again? How many times do I have to witness these faux breakouts in the silver sector before vomiting up my shares of EXK for good (lots of loaded shit in this paragraph)?

As some of you fine cardigan clothed gentlemen know, The PPT nailed the oversold on EXK 5 times in as many months! Right now the stock is on a run from $7.69, where it was flagged by our godly algos last. My cost basis is in the low $8’s and I’m inclined to sell into strength, only because the silver miners have proven over and over again that they are to be traded, not invested in.

Based upon the unbreakable laws of mathematics, here is the silver sector, ranked by technical strength.

At the present, EXK represents a staggering 18% of my assets. I’m heavily long based upon two things.

1. Central bank money printing caused by bailouts.
2. Repetition in oversold readings by my algorithms.

I respect things that have made me money in the past. Without a solid foundation to fall back on, you are nothing. My past defines my future– and by extension– my past will define yours.

You know I wasn’t even interested in DMND until some weird anti-semetic guy– with jewish sounding names– started to pump “DMND short to zero” posts on iBC? His posts were so stupid, so inane, totally devoid of any semblance of reason, I knew the stock was going higher, much higher.

People who know do not waste time leaving desperate comments on websites. Understand something, iBankCoin is the cooperstown of this blogging game; but the people that come to visit are often miscreants, dirty, stupid people, only interested in self-promotion. I built this site with my own hands, painfully gripping hammers and driving nails into the coffins of short sellers, since 2007. I have a gift for reading people, feeling the waves before they are visible to the masses.

There is a wave coming in the shares of DMND, much to the chagrin of Mr. Weinstein. I am here to collect his money and transfer it into Mrs. Fly home decor slush fund, so that she may purchase Persian rugs and ancient Roman vases, all for the explicit purposes of insanity.

Do not bet against the man in the time machine, small plebs, for he has already seen the future and knows what it brings.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nruro2d4YCo

ATPG had an enormous short position for years and now finds themselves drinking bourbon out of used oak barrels– bankrupt. GMCR was heavily shorted, well before the likes of Einhorn came along and pronounced the company to be a sham. DMND was shorted before news broke of accounting irregularities.

For you new-jack suckers out there: beware of stocks that are heavily shorted. More often than not, stocks that are targeted by shorts (think SHLD) are targeted for a reason. I love to play off the weaknesses of follow-on short sellers, squeezing them for short term gains. But I rarely hold heavily shorted stocks for long term.

When markets are in explode to the upside mode, stocks with bountiful short positions are the best stocks to own, due to the inevitability of less than committed, opportunistic, shorts sellers being forced to buy back shares to protect dwindling capital bases. But am I interested in holding DMND into earnings?

Fuck that shit.

Over the next several days, I intend to inflict massive damage to shorts sellers, trapped in DMND. They will cry and scream for help; but there are no near term catalysts to derail the stock from going “African Mask” on you bastards.

We’re going African Mask on DMND, throwing spears and shit into your faces, and then I am out.

DMND embodies this market. The company has not performed admirably and as a result is saddled with an enormous short position, constituting almost half of the shares outstanding. Do you know what is about to happen to said shorts?

Good Sir, I implore you to step out of the FAZmobile and smell the roses. The air is filled with aromas of sweet ambrosia. The sky is made from cotton and the ground you walk on is candy (specifically jolly ranchers).

As you dick around, embedded in shorts to nowhere, I am banking coin.

I made back all of Friday’s losses, AND MORE, thanks to VHC, DMND, EXK and others. I do not pretend to know everything: I know everything.

This is, mind you, a long only market.

NOTE: the final iteration of the iBankCoin redesign is almost completed. Like I said, I am taking the site back to an old school era, Geocities 1996 and shit. I am entirely fixed on presenting financial information and commentary that is unmatched in the western hemisphere and have made it my stated goal to accomplish this task before the prophecies of the Mayans comes to fruition.

Top picks: stocks mentioned in this post.

I’m not really bored; I just don’t care. Everyone is filled with useless opinions. “Where’s the market going? Oh, you were wrong on your last pick, therefore you suck.” This whole circus act gets monotonous– you know.

For example: the Blogger Network.

Long term frenemy and nuisance, V.King, is advertising his iBC blog that is filled with horseshit, regularly in these hallowed halls. As head gentleman of the lead parlour, am I supposed to just sit here and let that happen? Of course not. Executions will be liberally administrated, in accordance with iBC law. The sooner you come to grips with the fact that I am a superior being, the sooner you will be at peace with yourself. Don’t mimic me or try to curry my favour by doing outlandish things. I am a man of extreme purpose and taking time out of my day to polish this house weazens me.

Futures are flat and I am flush with cash, after selling out of my DECK position on Friday. It was a 12% gain and the Sterne analyst (the only one who nailed DECK) is still cautious on the name. I was thinking about reallocating that cash into some wacko investment, MRVL like. But then I thought about all of the times I was raped and humiliated in September and opted to do nothing instead. Even though I inverse nailed the MRVL trade, I am 1% off my annual highs. I am due (trust me) for a severe draw-down. It has happened to be about 50 times over the past two years: I am my worst enemy.

Heading into the second half of August, I am a net seller, but will remain opportunistic, as always.

Prepare yourselves.

I want nothing more than to inflict irreversible damage to those who are short TEA, DECK, CTRP, EXK and DMND. I want the VHC shorts to suffer too; but it’s not time for that show to being just yet. Mind you, the above stocks are big positions of mine, constituting the majority of my trading assets under management. However, I can’t even get excited about their progress thanks to the rakish effects that MRVL is having on my psyche.

I need my balls to swing low and my website to stick spears in the eyes of her enemies. Why, we’re on the verge of revolutionizing iBankCoin to an old school setting and I can’t even get excited about that. The studios at iBC have produced a horror film, for your eyes to behold, and still, I feel nothing but apathy–all thanks and praise to the dickless bastards who are running MRVL into the dirt.

May the Gods of Bones crush their skulls and grind them into dust.

Into the latter hours of the day, my losses are being offset, now down just 1.8%. I have several stocks on my radar worth purchase; but I have no desire to do anything but grow my beard and do push-ups until my arms fall off.

When MRVL was down 50 cents, I laughed at it. When it went down 1 dollar, I got mad, but felt the loss was small. When it went down $1.25, I got annoyed. When it went down $1.50, I was like “what the fuck is going on here?” With it down nearly $2, I want to skin the person who gave this to me alive and eat his liver. I don’t blame anyone for being pissed at MRVL. This is an unmitigated catastrophe. With $5 in net cash, it looks like the market is going to put that cash to the test.

In a market that is going higher, on a perpetual basis, there is nothing dumber than gambling on an earnings play, without an edge. The problem here, folks, I thought I had an edge, when in fact is was a ticking time bomb about to blow up in my face.

My options are simple: sell and move on or buy more.

Here’s the thing, I don’t want to buy more of this cocksucker. The idea of averaging down in this albatross is making me physically sick. On top of that, this fucking VHC is fucking itself and EXK is on siesta. The net result: I am down about 2.25% for the day. It may not sound like much, but on a day when I should be +0.5%, being down is fucking hateful to me.

I’ve been fuckfaced. However, don’t think for a second you can come here, with your stupid ties and ugly shoes, and pile on–as if I was some sort of garden clown in a box filled with water. I will murder you today, virtually and also in real life.

PREPARE FOR MY NEXT “BIG BET” (fucking asshole I am).

I wanted to hit the ground running and dunk shot with MRVL. Before earnings disappointed this evening, I was sitting at my annual highs. Just last week I was contemplating making MRVL a 20% position, until I got cold feet.

Where did the unmarvelous idea of MRVL come from?

It came from a source of mine, who has been useful and resourceful to me in the past. I didn’t do the research, but trusted he did. Apparently, he was wrong, and by extension, so was I.

In hindsight, what was I to do? Should I have ignored his advice, even thought he’s never let me down in the past? He’s served me well in the past, but will now become excommunicated from the House of Fly. I will move on from MRVL and do well. At 12% of my holdings, I am looking at a 1% draw down from my assets in the AM. Given the current state of the market, I might make a good deal of that back in my other positions. Either way, my confidence is not shaken, not in the least.

My EL position was 10% of assets and it ran +6 on an earnings beat earlier this week. Net, net, I am fantastically up for the year (no homo).

Where will I make up the staggering 1% loss from my assets tomorrow?

Well, I have 10% positions in the following:

DECK, EXK, VHC, CTRP and my little TEA is nearing that level soon. Pick one; they’re all going higher.

This is what we do. The business of speculation is never seamless and “sure things” often turn into marvelous jokes.

We move on.