The Party is Over

Some fleeting thoughts on the Las Vegas event:

I’d like to thank Victoria for doing an outstanding job organizing this event. Without her, we probably would’ve been throwing mashed potatoes at one another. As a leader, it’s important to know when to delegate a task and when to do it yourself. When it comes to dealing with 10,000 moving parts and negotiating with gorillas, my temperament is ill suited for such an affair. Speaking of which, if and when we do it in NYC, it will be a much bigger event. Most of our readership resides in the Northeast corridors of the United States, denizens of intelligent life forms and men of distinguished means. Las Vegas is a reprehensible city, a curse fixed upon the heads of mankind which shall be smited by the Gods before the millennium is up. When done in NYC, all of the rubes will immediately and thoroughly be dispatched from the iBC parlours by men with white gloves.

I promise you that.

Back to the markets.

It appears my largest position, GPRO, announced a secondary today, which cock-blocked the shares. This is normal and to be expected. Don’t panic, jackasses, for GPRO is destined to melt the faces of every single short seller in the world, before the year is over.

Here are my other top positions and a few thoughts.

TRN: prepare for beast mode. Needs higher oil.

ANET: I have no idea why it’s tanking. Puzzled I am.

MU: Hedge fund hotel. Will trace NASDAQ.

BALT: I expected it to drop, but not this far. I will be averaging down soon.

AAPL: Whatever.

SLCA: From diamond to dogshit. At this point, I just want it to turn into a fucking piece of coal.

GILD: Ho-hum

BID: I own this for my kids. This is a 50 year hold. Never sell it.

BX: The modern day Goldman.

LITB: Sucking off BABA’s tit.

YELP: I will never sell it.

I am a bit shot right now, having just got back from Vegas. I will have a lot more to say tomorrow. Feel free to talk shit amongst yourselves and make believe that I give a shit about your poor taste in cars, food and women.

Back to work.

It was amusing to hear some of you complain to me about not seeing The Fly, and how you wondered who he might be, to me. I ate breakfast, lunch and sat with you for the entire show. I came out to the VIP party and talked shop with everyone and heard your war stories. Some of you had nothing but kind words for Señor Tropicana and I appreciate that.

Everyone from the site, Jeremy, Jeff, Raul and Ragin Cajun kept my secret and were almost scared to talk to me, for fear they might reveal who I was. Even Howard Lindzon was able to contain himself from spilling the beans, which I thought might pose as a problem.

All in all, and I am surprised to have formed this opinion, I truly enjoyed your company. I’m a finance guy, after all, and enjoy speaking with others about finance. Mostly everyone I spoke with were interesting, intelligent, and polite.

The Zombie was the best dressed there, fully clad in a tux. He was on the prowl from the very beginning, trying to find out who I was. However, I was hidden in plain site, cloaked under a spell of dark magic, invisible to the untrained eye.

I did, however, reveal myself to just one of you. He was cherry picked out from the crowd, a long term reader and member of our services, who would hold my secret with him until his last dying days.

All in all, it was a great show and a charming evening. I am not sure if we will host another one of these events, since it was a pain in the ass to plan. However, if we do, I look forward to tricking all of you again.

Ciao from Las’d Vegas.

You fancy me to be a liar, don’t you? I told you I’d blend into the crowd, mere peasant amongst plebs. It was a fine showing, starting off with Asshat in Chief, Howard Lindzon. He rambled on about the future and how he bankrupted himself amidst tumult, back in the early days of the new millennium. He continued to fire buckshot towards my direction, then abruptly left for parts unknown.

The Option Addict put his heart and soul into his presentation and it showed. He was a great showman and almost motivational in the manner by which he delivered his missives.

Ragin Cajun was also very upbeat and on point.

And, of course, Jeff Mack, as usual, was funny as shit, informative and gave us a stock pick to boot.

As for me, I ate amongst you and heard you complain about “The Fly” being a no-show. I witnessed The Zombie and talked shop with some of you. Pardon my demand for secrecy and anonymity, for it is in the best interest of the country to keep my identity unknown, a national security threat of sorts.

Very shortly, I will head on over to the VIP After Hours Party.

See you soon and thank you for attending.

This is the sort of title I wanted to write before heading out into the fucking sunset.

My GPRO edged higher, as well as TRN, LITB, AAPL, SLCA, BID, WFM and others. However, on the other side of there ledger, there is LPNT, HCA, ICPT, ANET: CATASTROPHE.

Even BALT is starting to lose its luster.

Luckily, I am long more than three dozen names and have heavily weighted towards just three: GPRO, TRN and ANET. The latter caused me fits today, sending me to the saloon early, down 1.1%. I suppose it could’ve been worse, ahead of our Las Vegas event. Nonetheless, I exit the week feeling a sense of doom, just ’round the corner. Then again, I am always sensing doom and sometimes I invite it.

I’d wish you all a good weekend; but I really don’t care about you enough to do it. Please continue to live and visit iBankCoin and feel free to click on the ads, for it helps finance my fight against humanity, vis a vis the ORBITAL SPACE CANNON (OSC).

I own a small position in ICPT. But it’s down so god damned much, it is having a material effect on my day. Biotech stocks are the playground of devils, both long and short. You shouldn’t ever go long any in size, unless of course you’re interested in having a triple bypass surgery at some point in your life.

Everything looks weak, aside from oil. There is something to be said about diversification, mind you. The very shares that once served as an albatross for me are now helping to stem my losses. DVN, SLCA and TRN are all higher. I own some WFM too and that’s higher. But, all in all, GPRO, ANET and MU have shaped my day, etched in the granite of vampires, and I am bleeding red today–off by 1.1%.

Believe you me, there is nothing more coveted by me than to see the faces of my enemies liquidated by the violent cults of bull market followers. But today is not the day to celebrate, but to mourn.

Last night, I’ll have you know, I won several hundred dollars, maybe about $400, playing roulette. The funny thing about gambling is I walked away feeling victorious. Had I lost $400, I would have felt the pangs of death scratching at my temple. But here I am now, in the real world, down hundreds of thousands of dollars, tens of thousands of personal money, and I don’t even break a sweat. We, as speculators, are desensitised to the fluctuations of the market and our subsequent losses and/or gains.

Why is that?

I’ve gambled before–but always have done so sparingly. I’ve never lost any money at it–because I’ve always played the odds correctly at the roulette table. At the end of the day, Las Vegas is a place built upon the bones of the mentally addled, persons spanning the continent in search for riches and sport. I, on the other hand, speculate in the stock market on a daily basis.

I create my own odds and have made a fine living doing it.

While some of you waste away at the poker tables, losing sums of money that force your wives into divorce, and yourselves into a disheveled life of wanton alcoholism and/or male prostitution, “The Fly” plots his next move in the stocked market.

After the bell, ANET reported blow out, and I mean blow out, numbers. However, Morgan Stanley permitted an early release from the lock-up period for non-executive employees. This, of course, is an absurd reason to sell stock and I need to address this now.

I see the lot of you on the internet, always citing lock up periods as a legitimate reason to sell stock. Did you know when the lock up period for YELP ended, the stock soared 30% that day? It was a short squeeze, a trap of sorts, and it laid waste to anyone who played the event. When a company comes public, employees get to cash in on their stock options. This has happened since the beginning of the stock market and is an asinine reason to sell shares in a company that is performing.

A pox on the lot of you, the ones at the pokered tables and the ones selling ANET in the after hours. “The Fly” seeks revenge of the sordid varietal and he shall have it before the month is through.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPN7J369RNI

I am Santa Claus.

I added to my GPRO position out of pure, unadulterated, greed and avarice for materialistic items.

Upon landing in Las Vegas, I was greeted to a man spitting on the ground. He had a hat turned on backwards, unshaved face, and generally looked like a bedraggled microbe. I rented a car, in order to avoid having to enter the cars of strangers. I then drove to my destination and was once again greeted by unshaved men, who angrily smoked upon cigarettes while aggressively losing money in the slotted machines.

As you can tell, “The Fly” has never been to this place called Las Vegas and he finds it to be contemptible, a safe harbor for neanderthals clad in black silk button down dress shirts. Any proper man would immediately leave this place, for something more along the lines of a real city, with people who have clean faces and reserve spitting for their bathroom sinks.

After all, if you are interested in gambling, why come here to lose? You have a far greater chance at scoring huge buckets of cash with The Options Addicts weekly YOLO plays, if you ask me.

Throughout yesterday’s trading session, Le Fly was greeted to severe battle axes about the cheeks and gums, with GPRO, BALT, TRIP and ANET cratering hard–as the market ripped higher. Do not be fooled by the general indices; there was significant distribution in a number of high beta names.

Truth be told, I expected drops in both TRIP and BALT, which is why I started small positions in them. I will add to them into weakness.

My cash levels are around 10%. I intend to use it all in GPRO and BALT, if the Gods grace me with further weakness.

I know GPRO is off $10 over the past two days and it would have been ‘cool’ to have sold then bought it back cheaper. But hindsight is 20/20 and I am long this stock for the holidays, win, lose or draw.

I will be departing soon for Vegas, in order to properly lurk–anonymously–amidst the scads in attendance. In the meantime, I will assign a caretaker to iBankCoin (extra Shining), to look over things while I am away. I am sure I will bang out a blog or two, but in a supporting role no doubt.

In case you’ve been hiding under a rock, iBankCoin is hosting its first ever investors conference, MC’d by our very own Ragin Cajun. Guest speakers include founder and chairman of StockTwits, Howard Lindzon and Yahoo Finance anchor Jeff Macke, formerly from CNBC’s Fast Money. If you are unfamiliar with Jeff, do a youtube search. He’s great.

The keynote speaker will be The Option Addict aka The Man speaks to the dead for mind-blowing stock tips. For an additional fee, we are also hosting a special VIP cocktail party, after hours (pun intended). There are a few seats left, so feel free to hop on a plane and bathe in the glory that is iBankCoin.

After the close, GPRO appointed Zander Laurie to head up their burgeoning media division, the very same division that Citron built their bear thesis around. On a stack of burning bibles and holy korans, one could only hope for a pullback in the shares–heading into the X-mas season.

In summary, Le Fly is up, up and away, oil is dead, and GPRO bears are plain ole vanilla gay.

The catamites over at Citron ‘Research’ published a hit piece on GPRO today, which is particularly amusing since they haven’t the slightest edge on something as mainstream as this. My recommendation for them is to stick to their Chinese accounting plays and leave the real market, filled with real companies, to men who are interested in the upward trajectory of mankind.

Now before their report, GPRO was soaring high, up more than $2.50. Post report, it now wallows down by just 60 cents, up from down $3.

YOU CANNOT STOP THE HONEY BADGER aka GPRO. It is coming to eat your liver whole and there is nothing that you or your stupid fruity friends can do about it.

I view today’s sell off as constructive and absolute for the oil and gas space. My SLCA position is receiving multiple lumps to the skull. There are some stocks, like FMSA, doing decidedly worse.

According to Dennis Gartman, we are now entering a new era of energy renaissance, led by cold fusion. Albeit, it may take 200 years for us to convert to such a standard; the point remains: oil is old hat.

Top picks: TRN, GPRO, ANET, MU and BALT.