iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,387 Blog Posts

Fly Sell: PACW

I sold short 10,000 [[PACW]] @ $14.80.

Disclaimer: If you sell short PACW because of this post, Iran will bomb your house, with their new missiles. And, you may lose money.

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Fly Buy: RIG, FXP

I bought 5,000 [[RIG]] @ $144.75. And, I bought 1,000 [[FXP]] @ $82.37

Disclaimer: If you buy RIG or FXP because of this post, the SEC will investigate you for bad mouthing Lehman.

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ROFL @ Internet Leeches

You people need to stop offering investment advice. Quit posting monkey’s and shit, claiming we are on our way up. Fuck you, you’re dead: we’re going lower.

Look at [[LEH]] fuckface. Are you one of those manchilds who keep their eyes covered, scared to see the horror?

Not me.

“The Fly,” like Jefferson Krull, embraces the horror and banks egregious coin from it. I’m like the Freddy Krueger of this business. I’ll get you when you are sleeping.

Oil is going up, as evidenced by the idiots invested in [[DOY]]. On this spike, I want to buy more [[RIG]], [[PCZ]], [[FTK]] and [[ARD]].

In addition, I want to buy [[FXP]], [[REW]] and [[TWM]].

I would like to sell short hotel stocks, like [[WYNN]], [[LVS]] and [[MGM]]. However, they are down too far. I do not want to be on the receiving end of some sort of homo short squeeze.

Instead, I will add to my [[JEC]], [[MXB]] and [[CAT]] shorts. Also, I may start shorting [[VMC]] and [[TEX]].

As for the banks, [[CATY]], [[EWBC]], [[CSE]] and [[TCB]] look good to short here.

More on this later.

NOTE: Calvino “The Strip Killa” nailed the Vegas shorts.

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I Dare You To Bet Against Me

I just got back from some stupid fucking meeting. Upon doing so, I see the market is fucking blasting off, with cock in hand. This is a welcomed event for someone, such as myself.

Currently, I am in possession of large quantities of cash. It’s just sitting there, bored as hell, waiting for me to pimp it out. As you know, I have small bets against [[JEC]], [[MXB]] and [[CAT]]—but nothing major.

Also, it’s worth noting, I shorted a little [[HRB]] today. Don’t ask me why.

Long story short:

The market has been weak on rumors and shit. Who knows what will happen to [[FNM]] and [[LEH]]. Maybe, just maybe, they are extraordinary buys down here.

Nonetheless, with my money, I choose not to get involved with speculation and asshattery. I’d rather wait for a bounce, then shoot some fish in a barrel—such as [[FED]], [[FHN]], [[DSL]], [[CORS]] and [[PACW]].

For now, my focus is to debank some of you assholes betting against my [[RIG]].

I’ll have you know, it is my largest position.

NOTE: Hotel stocks are absurd.

UPDATED NOTE: Hotel stocks are the gayest things, since the piano was invented.

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Keep An Eye on LEH

That piss o’ shit is getting flushed and the market is ignoring it. Actually, the market is acting like a scared kid, putting his hands over his eyes, in order to avoid seeing the horror.

I have no position in [[LEH]]. However, if I had to bet, I’d say that fucker is going out of business.

[[PZN]] is almost single digits. Frankly, I do not think that firm deserves to stay in business. They lost 28% of their assets under management last quarter!

And, many of the other brokers are “doing the Lehman,’ via diving daily. From [[SUSQ]] to [[MER]], they all blow.

I see some of you think your bullshit Honda Accord is in fact a time machine, via selling short my [[RIG]]. Go ahead, have a ball. Just know, betting against “The Fly” is illegal in 32 states and punishable by lethal injection or electric chair.

Gold looks sweet here. [[DGP]] gets it done.

And, Finally, [[JEC]] is rallying today off of SGR‘s numbers. To hell with both of them. I want to sell JEC right here, right now.

Top pick: short [[CAT]], short JEC

NOTE: Aside from LEH, keep an eye on [[FNM]], [[FRE]], [[FCSX]], [[NLY]], [[CMO]], [[MFA]] and [[MTG]] too. No way the market can hold up with all this shit floating around.

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Another Ax to ‘Global Growth’ Head

Jim “Asshole with a Bow Tie” Rogers’ new home country, Singapore, just caught a fastball to the mustache.

So much for the ‘global growth story’

Singapore’s real gross domestic product rose by an estimated 1.9 percent on year in the second quarter of 2008, the Ministry of Trade and Industry said on Thursday.

That was well below analyst expectations of a 5.1 percent annual increase, and it was also down from the 6.9 percent annual expansion in the previous quarter.

On a quarterly and seasonally adjusted basis, real GDP was down 6.6 percent after an increase of 15.6 percent in the previous quarter.

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UPDATED: Rally Time Over, Bitches

Put your fucking monkey’s away and sell something short.

The banks are being killed, again.

I like:

short [[EWBC]], short [[CSE]], short [[PACW]], short [[VLY]], short [[ONB]], short [[CAT]], short [[JEC]], short [[TEX]], short [[WFSL]], short [[LFC]], short [[CHL]] and short [[VMC]].

Long [[RIG]], long [[REW]], long [[TWM]], long [[FXP]], long [[SMN]], long [[PCZ]] and long [[FTK]].

However, it’s worth noting, I am very busy at the moment and will not have the time, nor the fervor, to execute any trades. Plus, I don’t need to.

Closing Comments:

I can’t believe that I missed out on the epic collapses of hotel/casino stocks. Names like [[WYNN]], [[OEH]], [[MGM]], [[MPEL]], [[BYD]] and even [[TRMP]] have been bastions of joy and solace for the bears.

I mean, not shorting TRMP is the pinnacle of having ones head in the sand.

Sometimes I just block shit out. I don’t even pay attention to some sectors, because I’m too focused on another. I never look at airlines and rarely punch up auto stocks. For the most part, I move from one project to the next. For months, I have been killing it on the banks. Now, I am geared towards betting against ‘global growth.’

In all honesty, as opposed to outright fibbing, the hotel stocks still blow. I bet they get castrated, again.

If you’re long this market, the life just got sucked out from your skull—with the markets down more than 200. You were over there thinking: “hey man, these wicked banks look totally gnarly”; until some asshole knocked down your door and broke your nose with a frozen can of Monster Energy Soda.

Speaking of which, [[HANS]] is dead. I am floored by the gay trading habits of that name. Luckily for me, I don’t like equities and have no position.

On the day, “The Fly” aka Senor Tropicana aka Plutonium Petey was up 1.9%, pushing his year to date gains to nearly 60%.

Off to eat a few rib eyes.

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Donny is a Freakin’ Retard

Hey kid, you made it big. From this day on, you can tell your kids: “one day I was the headline story for Fly’s website.”

Go ahead people, bet against oil, see where it gets you. As a matter of fact, go buy some “oil down” bullshit, via [[DOY]]. I guess the assholes who created DCR were so pleased with it “zeroing out,” they decided to build another one. Genius!

What the fuck is wrong with those assholes, making ETF’s that go to zero?

Look, I threw out my economics 101 book a long time ago. If you are going to live a life of luxury, off of egregious stock market gains, you cannot think rationally. Shit is backwards, turned inside out. By the time you figure it out, it self destructs—blowing your arms, legs and balls off.

At this juncture, only assholes bet against crude. They are the same people who are buying bank stocks on the dip and are avid CNBC fans. Some of them even have posters of Bob Pisani, walking the NYSE, on their bedroom walls.

If you insist on betting against oil, do it with style. Go with the ETF (DOY) that can send your bullshit account to zero, effectively leaving you broke, penniless and plain ol’ vanilla gay.

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