iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,002 Blog Posts

Asshat of the Year Award: Angelo Mozilo

“How ’bout a year end Asshat of the Year Award?”

Angelo Mozilo, CEO, Countrywide Financial 

Oh, there were so many candidates, for “Asshat of the Year Award” in 2007, since there were so many asshats. However, I think it’s fair to say, Angelo “stole the cake,” ate it, then baked a new one.

Mozilo, not to be confused with Firefox’s “mozilla,” or former Met “Lee Mazzilli, is an asshat.

I refuse to explain the reasons as to why Angelo is an asshat. Just look at his stock, [[CFC]].

In short, men like Angelo fucked up the world, with their weak lending standards. Many people will lose their jobs and have their lives flipped upside down, thanks to the retard-in-charge at CFC.

Congrats to Angelo.

A true master in the arts of Asshattery.

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Ridiculous Success Awaits You…

… in 2008.

If you had setbacks in 2007, put them to the back of your mind.

Psychologically, those who use the new year as a “clean slate” or “fresh start” are mentally ill, since our calendar is nothing more than fodder—prior to death. Nonetheless, it works for me.

Mostly everyone I know uses the new year as an opportunity to repair or improve their lives.

From dieting to work ethic, the new year is the proverbial line in the sand, which enables you to change your life for the better. While it’s true, Godly folks, like “The Fly,” leave little room for improvement; there is always something that could be done with greater efficiency.

During 2008, I intend to exert more patience with people and actually listen to grievances, as opposed to “chucking them,” out of my fucking office.

Also, I will make more money.

Finally, don’t feel bad that you’re a pathetic fat fucker. There is plenty of time to correct your “gay ways” and start living a more “Fly life.”

Over the past year, I’ve enjoyed the dialog with many of you, while blogging like a fool— on FlyonWallstreet.blogspot.com and here. I’ve made some decent “internet friends,” and amassed many enemies, who will be attacked with “internet artillery” in 2008.

Heck, I’ve even sold “VIZ.” t-shirts to total strangers.

In closing, be sure to enjoy today’s festivities. But, DO NOT put your family or others at risk by drinking and driving. “The Fly,” as you already know, will celebrate tonight, like a King. The champagne will flow, while colossal shrimp get tossed around like gold coins (gold coins are readily tossed around at “The Fly’s” house).

Enjoy & Cheers.

Fly, 2007

UPDATE: ASSHAT OF THE YEAR AWARD, 2007.

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Predictions for 2008

The elections will be gay.

Taxes will go up.

Emerging markets will get their teeth kicked in, especially “BRIC.”

Commodity prices will remain robust, as food supplies dwindle.

Oil will keep a tight range of $75-90.

Natural gas will break $10.

Gold will break $1,000.

Two major financial institutions will fail.

There will be mergers in the brokerage sector.

Agriculture stocks will outperform in the first half, then dive in the 2nd.

Semiconductor stocks will bore investors to death.

[[CC]] will file for bankruptcy protection.

[[HOV]] will file for bankruptcy protection.

Stem cell stocks will gain momentum, with strong Democratic poll showings.

Utilities will continue to outperform, as old people look for yield.

[[PFE]] will make a big acquisition.

Many solar burrito stocks will drop by 50%, before recovering.

[[RIMM]] will get hit hard, in the second half of 2008.

[[AAPL]] will do well.

[[GOOG]] will lose mojo.

The Dow Jones will fall by 15%.

The Nasdaq will fall by 15-20%.

“The Fly” will still bank coin, despite spending too much time talking to retards on the internets.

Finally, iBankCoin.com will be worth millions.

Viz.

UPDATE: The Earth will explode, much to your chagrin.

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Your Feedback is Not Needed

The Godly folks at iBankCoin.com are on the verge of selecting its first Peanut Gallery blogger, to be awarded his own IBC blog— with revenue sharing/tab and all.

However, for those of you who are not picked, do not lose hope. “The Fly” has a vision of carrying 1,000 bloggers under his gold plated umbrella, in due time.

With those 1,000 bloggers, “The Fly” will seize the financial part of the internet and hand out so many Asshat of the Week awards; it will become a household conversation topic.

For example: At a future dinner table, I envision Dad asking Mom: “Hun, did you see who got the Asshat of the Week award today?” Mom replies: “No Dear, who was it?” Dad concludes: “It was that fucktard Herb the Bearshitter, again (both laughing profusely over a plate of oatmeal).”

A wonderful twisted world, indeed.

Also, we have added many new features to the quote system. Check it out.

Upon doing so, feel free to write your suggestions down on a piece of paper, then give it to some random homeless guy in the subway.

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Get Ready to Die

The bullshit paint taping session closed, with stocks mainly unchanged.

There isn’t much to say, other than get ready for the “hammer of certain death” to reign down with great fury on your bullshit brokerage accounts, soon.

“The Fly” is a big ol’ crazy bear now, ripping the lungs out of innocent pedestrians, who happen to be long stocks.

Also, aside from that, I have every intention to single handedly derail the Gov’t sponsored rally in China. To me, they’re all “n00bs.”

In closing, don’t expect the winners of 2007 to repeat. You will get bitch slapped, over weighting [[AAPL]] up here. With my money, I will add to [[SKF]] and [[FXP]], while fiercely throwing darts at the face of the one called “Tokman.”

That is all.

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Book the Loss

If you are still holding onto losing positions, dump them already.

For me, the new year is a refresher. It’s a clean slate for everyone. The great equalizer.

I can go on.

If you wouldn’t buy certain stocks in your portfolio, with new money, then it’s time for you to bite the bullet and sell them, right now.

Think about it this way: if I gave you 100k to invest today, what stocks would you pick?

That’s what your portfolio should look like, not yesterday’s hot stocks.

Anyway, I’m heeding my own advice and selling many losers. For now, I will leave the proceeds in cash, while planning my next attack.

As for today’s trading:

[[ABK]] is receiving the “knife of certain death.” Eggs are on fire, via [[CALM]]. And, dry shit is melting up, via [[DRYS]]. That’s really all you need to know about today’s trading session.

Enjoy.

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