“Golder” Than You

News Alert: our resident gold-bug, “Senator Gint” has surrendered his Chairmanship of the Gold-Bug committee, due to exogenous events inside of his brain. Effective immediately, “Senor Tropicana” aka “The Fly” aka “Platinum Petey” is your new resident gold/silver bug, as evidenced by his splendid EXK position.

Let it be known and heard throughout these halls.

That is all.

Yields are fucking soaring in Bernanke’s face. Take a look at munis or treasuries: ouch. One might say “rates are normalizing” because the economy is roaring back. It’s not coming back, but ROARING. However, if that’s the case, then why do we have QE2? Conundrum.

With my money, I stepped up and added to my EXK position, when it was down 5%. On Jupiter’s Stone, that motherfucker responded to my emotions and ripped higher. Moreover, I added to my REXX position into bullshit weakness. That came back a little too. As of now, EXK and REXX represent #1 and #2 positions by size.

Two Chinese ipo’s worth noting: YOKU and DANG were stellar outperformers today. This bodes well for investment banks. Not only are they busy with mergers and acquisitions, but their ipo desks are humming. At some point, YOKU is a must own, for the long term.

All I have to say to you dirty bastards: indeud.

I bought 25,000 REXX, as idiots sell.

I added to my EXK position, making it my largest position by size. With today’s slide, I am down about 3% on it, so far. Additionally, I added to my REXX position and started a new one in AKS. Oddly enough, I sold out of my second largest position, CLF, in order to raise more cash, following this mornings give back. Essentially, I am conflicted between the Asshole Dip Buyer thesis and something that has much to do about black flags, smoke and bustling metal. Needless to say, because of my confusion, I have opted for my 40% cash position to remain intact, as well as my SCO hedge.

While tech, banks and select oil trades, like HERO, look good to go, other sectors are struggling. There are many people out there nervous about buying into this market. However, I implore you to understand something: there is a strong bid underneath this tape, thanks to end of year bullshit. This is not imaginary, but a fact.

Sometimes the quick money, through fast trading, spoils a person rotten. Next thing you know, you are unwilling to hold stocks that trade lower, for fear of giving back. Well, I am guilty of such crimes right now. However, I am not willing to sell everything, since I think we have upside left. Plus anyway, I have no issues, whatsoever, with giving back some gains, in order to stay the course. I am the George Bush of investing up in this bitch.

Basically, I am shutting the trading software down for the day. SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN! I will continue to blog, giving you ingrates updates. But as far as buying and selling is concerned, I have made my bed and it’s not a very bad bed at all. As a matter of fact, the mattress is quite nice, fitted with small sticks of dynamite and hot coals.

Buying the dips on EXK, long another 50,000. And, I nibbled on some AKS.

UPDATE: I added to REXX.

Disclaimer: Stocks are for asshats. Never forget that.

It appears the market may skip over the boring and cumbersome “consolidation” phase and go straight up again. If you go with the concept that “it’s all a conspiracy” and “mutual fund madness STARTS NOT,” it’s easy to understand why we are melting higher. Year to date, the dollar is up and our markets are outperforming. That’s right, the U.S. markets are doing better than most foreign markets and our dollar hasn’t cratered. Naturally, it’s only a matter of time before the dollar really nosedives. However, as of now, the dollar has been a non-event for 2010.

Having said that, from an investors stand-point, it makes little sense to hold a lot of cash here, ahead of “window dressing” season. Fund managers need to own stocks and they need to own them now. Hence, the race to position correctly should be your priority.

Bottom line: I will likely put a lot of cash back to work today. Ebb and flow with the emotions of the market: that’s what I do.

Aside from the iBankCoin team, my only real internet allies are the good folks over at Stocktwits.com. Howard Lindzon (“The Lindzon Lifestyle”) and Phil (Dr. Evil) Pearlman have always been honest and trustworthy with me, one more than the other (just a little). They are good peeps and deserve all of the money in the world (except my own), AND MORE. Although, I do take exception to Howard’s taste in fine fare, as he regularly frequents low end pizzerias for food and “grub.”  However, being the kind and understanding person that I am, I look past his grotesque habits and chalk it up to a “rough childhood.” At any rate, this post is not about my superior taste in food or shoes, but StockTwits’ monster win.

We all love to hate the Yhoo message boards; but it is the crown jewel of finance on the web. Let’s face it. STARTING NOW, fuckface, StockTwits stream will be featured on  Yhoo Finance stock pages, under “Market Pulse.” How sick is that?

First, let me start by saying, the Stocktwits iphone app is a must have,  just like the iBankCoin app. However, if you own a bullshit blog, this is a game changer for you. Because Yhoo is using StockTwits’ api, rendering Twitter retarded, as it no longer makes sense to post on Twitter, with a little “$” linking it to StockTwits.

Why? Stick around for exactly 3.5 more seconds and I will tell you.

Answer: Because it won’t show up in the Market Pulse stream, you imbecile.

In summary, StockTwits is on the verge of breaking out to the upside. If only I owned some stock. Oh shit, I fucking do (“The Fly” wins again) own stock!  Moreover, if you want to be heard by the growing StockTwits crowd and mammoth Yhoo Finance population, especially you third rate bloggers, you will need to start posting directly onto the StockTwits feed, STARTING NOW.

The Wikileaks guy is now in Wikigaol. The Federal Reserve is losing lots of coin, as rates spiral higher. At the same time, munis, specifically California, are getting smashed again. Inside of The PPT, I keep an index called Risk Appetite, which serves to gauge the appetite for risk, worldwide, via exchange traded ETF’s. Needless to say, the chart looks grim. The cost of borrowing is on the rise (see TLT) and The Bearded Clam needs to fix that shit, ASAP. As a tax paying American, I demand upward surges in my equities, at all times and forever.

You do not need to compare yourself to me. Hell, you do not need to read this fucking blog, yet you do. Do you know why? Because you are attracted to greatness, which is what “The Fly” represents here daily. I warned you to raise cash earlier today; but you chose to listen to some ham and egger on twitter instead. Look, the stock market is not done going higher. However, we are long overdue a correction to the tune of 5%. I predict oil will retrace to the low $80’s, before spring-boarding higher, effectively water-boarding shorts.

Into this misery, I bulked up on my SCO position.

UPDATE: I sold out of Q, raising cash position to 42%

If you are similar to me (none of you are like me), you have big dicked gains and have an IQ over 150. Such a person, like myself, would start to unwind some of his positions going into the second half of December. Granted, it’s just the beginning of December and I have a 35% cash position. But, there’s a method to my madness.

I endeavor to buy ALL DIPS. However, I cannot buy dips without cash. Do you see the rub? I demand answers and I repeat: Do you see the rub?

I like HERO and PWAV here, bur cannot buy any. I am bounded by my methods, for they keep me disciplined. Believe me, there is no greater feeling than participating in a rabid, foam-mouthed melt-up. Furthermore, there is no greater pain than missing out on such a run. However, there comes a time when you must scale back a bit, especially when you’re having too much fun. Judging by the 8 fold increase in my personal accounts, I’d say my fun is excessive and belligerent.

Go eat pretzels and kick old people in the chest. While you’re at it, be sure to raise a little cash, so that you can nibble on dips, like a large rat stuck in a sugar cone.

As for me, I hedged my personal with SCO and “cashed up” for clients. With 50% year to date gains and a time machine at my disposal, I am well positioned to outstrip you for the foreseeable future.

I bought 10,000 SCO @ $10.64.

Disclaimer: If you try to drive my space rocket, you will crash into the Sun. And, you may lose money.