iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,439 Blog Posts

Are You Hungary For Risk?

Hungarian CDS and sovereign bond yields are maniacal to the upside. No one trusts the shit coming out of Italy and Spain, do you really think they will trust those filthy bastards from the East? All of the Balkans are in danger of getting flushed. If that happens, European banks will take another hit, especially Swedish banks, who have especially high exposure to the animals from that part of the world.

If you think about it, this is a desirable outcome. After all, Darwinism is the best form of filter for mankind. Let the weak and the impaired suffer and die. It is the will of the Gods, it shall be done.

Moving on, they are remaking the 80’s hit movie Red Dawn. Do you remember that shit? This time, instead of bastards from Nicaragua and Russia invading Kansas, it will be the Chinese. Actually, it was supposed to be the Chinese invading the US–but they digitally changed it to North Koreans because Chinese money is flooding into the pockets of degenerates in Hollywood. Can you believe that? We can no longer make movies that insult the feelings of the gayish Chinese because they are financing everything. Fuck a giraffe running sideways inside of an ice cream truck.

Finally, unemployment numbers are getting better. It’s an election year, so expect a full court press by the red Obama party to give the illusion of prosperity. They will take pictures of people driving wooden Rolls Royce prop cars, then say “see, everyone is rich as fuck again. Vote O.”

In summary, Hungary is in need of emergency IMF funding and Italy has a mammoth bond auction at the end of the month. Trade accordingly.

[YOUTUBE:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2LG-ASco6o 603 500]

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CES and Iran Are Worthless and Stupid

The CES trade show is coming soon, something I used to get all giddy about when I was playing MVIS for some “Joozy news.” The truth is, Intel is the only company there worth listening to because all of the products “revealed” are huckster-horseshit.

Sure, you will see stuff from SIGM, NVDA, ROVI and others, but who cares? It’s just an excuse for third rate salesmen to get drunk, pass out, and piss all over themselves, following the “grand presentation.”

For the love of a gorilla god, the fucking show is in Vegas. Some of you like Vegas. I think it’s the ashtray of America, where hookers and alcoholics pair up to spread venereal diseases to the rest of America. Going to Vegas to “get rich” is like moving to Tehran for religious freedom.

Speaking of Iran, I just love the way those stupid camel molesters think they can get away with bossing us around. We will shoot their navy out of the water from outerspace! We will send loser farmers from 0hio, who are most accustomed to beating cows and chickens to death with their bare fists for sport, to guard POW camps filled with these Iranian navy fuckers. The boys from 0hio will make them donkey punch each other, whilst documenting the whole thing on their stupid iPhones–because they are jackasses.

America is a fucked up place, loaded with people suffering from acute dementia. You do not want to fuck with our oil supplies, else we will find ample reasons to “disarm” your stupid country, killing scores of “rebels”,”terrorists” and “insurgents”, razing hospitals and cemeteries along the way, until we run out of fucking money.

Keep in mind, Ben Bernanke has an endless supply of that shit.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYFGRD1T9wQ 603 500]

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Forgiveness Shall Be Granted

As you know, I’ve declared that 2012 would be the year of charity by yours truly. Both monetarily and mood, I shall bestow gifts upon the people around me. Come March, during the annual iBC March Madness contest, I will be giving away $1,000 to the winner. As we speak or rather read this, I am having my staff think of two more contests, just to give me an excuse to donate money to those of you accessing the internet from one of the many housing tenements in America. And right now, I am accepting apologies from the great many of you who besmirched me for owning both LULU and DECK.

I wish to engage the nabobs on this site who call my honor and know how into question. Step forth young man and have your say!

NFLX sprinted higher. I should have bought it this morning when Ragin’ mentioned it inside of 12631. Nevertheless, there are other stocks worth a look here. I will give you two, as an example of my charity: FOSL, WLT or maybe even WHR.

The month of January is all about psychological warfare. Everyone is trying to outmaneuver one another to get an edge, a jumpstart if you will, to start the new year well. Typically, the sloth gets in late and ends up getting decapitated in February, traditionally a very hard month.

In summary, apologies and being accepted and I am on the verge of making two surgical moves. They are chess moves–not the sort of thing you are used to watching on Twitter–you small, dirty, disgusting dog pleb of a man.

Off to drink some Earl Grey.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU_QR_FTt3E 603 500]

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Steaming Forward

While most of you wallow in substandard positions, “The Fly” is ripping higher today, buoyed by LULU, DECK, DVR and WNR. The very stocks that served as an albatross to me are propelling me now to greater heights. You called DECK a loser because it traded lower from my original basis. But what you fail to acknowledge is the patience and deepness of my commitment to seeing it profitable. I do not care if the stock trades lower, on no news, over a two week time span. Before I am done here on iBankCoin, I hope you learn the ancient art of patience, often exhibited here by Plutonium Petey aka “The Fly.”

For the day, I am up more than 2%, putting year to date gains at 3.5%. All of the money I make here will be used to finance my Orbital Space Cannon project, for the explicit purposes of offensive measures. Remember, I have a great many enemies, most of whom lurk in the darkest shadows of America, vagrants, miscreants of the first order.

Enough about me and my little problems. How are you doing? Are you buckled into the FAZmobile, awaiting something grande? Are you planning a trip to some place exotic?

There are so many stocks that tempt me here, even NFLX. However, I am purposely distracting myself to avoid adding more money to this tape. In my estimation, the correct trade is to raise cash or hedge. I have no urge to liquidate my positions today because they are behaving like top hatted gentlemen. But I am watching them, ever so closely–and at the first sign of weakness, I will sell them and replace them with marble statues or $5,000 bottles of vintage Bordeaux.

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Time to Dilute

The big, bad Italian bank, Unicredit, is going to market–raising 7.5 billion euros. I anticipate this to be the first of many capital raises, onerous in nature–greatly dilutive to current shareholders. Keep in mind, Unicredit is raising capital at a 69% discount to current share price. You need to be careful when navigating the financial landscape.

My largest position, LULU, is sprinting higher today. I anticipate my enemies in LULU, those who oppose all that is good and just in this world, to be skinned alive today. Should you stare into the abyss that is unlimited in nature, which is the potential downside of short sellers of LULU and decide to short DECK, based upon specious rumors of warm weather (it’s cold as fuck today), you may indeud share a similar fate.

Let it be known and have it spread like the plague, 2012 will be the year of “The Fly”.

After yesterday’s purchase of TZA, my cost basis is now $26.40, or down 2.3% from current prices.

Do you need to worry today?

Well, European yields and CDS spreads are hardly moving. People are only concerned about the dilutive effects of egregious share offerings. Nevertheless, I do not sense imminent danger here. As a matter of fact, I would be surprised if the bulls laid down and let the disgusting clowns– who live on Twitter– dictate the tone, so early in the new year.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4G0bYIaJuHg&feature=youtu.be 603 500]

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Mathematical Precision Yet Again

Pardon my imprudence for interrupting your evening with yet another blog. However, I thought it was a good time to update you all on my Silvery Reversal post from last week. Happily for my good friend, Senator Gint, both gold and silver have saved him from a rude opening to 2012. Out of nowhere, inflation seems to be the trade. However, I warn you now, be careful about acting in haste and do not forget the insolvent realties in Europe.

Here are the results from The PPT proposed ZSL short.

Naturally, one would assume that this is mere coincidence, an aberration of sorts. The truth is, this is the 15th of 16 previous occasions that The PPT has nailed ZSL, almost to the day.

What next?

Well, I added one last round of TZA today, completing the third tranche of my buying program. Should this trade end up a loser, I am willing to accept that. The whole idea is adhering to certain disciplines and believing in them, especially when your faith in them are tested.

Having said all of that, I enjoyed a 1.65% rally in my holdings today. I will be selling into strength, but not all. My target cash percentage goal is anywhere from 40-60%. As you could understand, I was in no way largely exposed to the market elements today, as most of you vagrant gamblers made north of 5%.

At any rate, it’s gonna be a long, long year and the majority of you, on your own, will be insolvent before 2013 is ushered in. Everything you saw today was a lie. Enjoy it while you can because it will be short lived and Italy is gonna fuck the planet soon enough.

UPDATE: This is hilarious, especially if you’re in the business.

H/t Backnfill

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Belligerently Soaring Higher

The eastern lunatics in Iran have helped my small cap oil stocks charge higher, thanks to their high tech weaponry and cavalier attitude towards the United Steaks. As they fire patriotic missiles into the sky, shares of GMXR, DVR and WNR spring higher. Naturally, our aircraft carriers cower in some remote corner of the Persian Gulf, afraid of the horrors that await them at the hands of Gods navy.

If Iran accomplishes the unthinkable by closing the Straights of Hormuz, I shall send their leader a box of chocolates, as a gift, to congratulate them on such an act of heroism. Then I shall hedge myself via buying LMT, NOC and ATK, just in case we accidentally drop 10,000 tonnes of explosives on Tehran.

Aside from the alarming sell-offs in both LULU and DECK, I am having a good day. It is not a 1st tier day, where my largest holdings explode, without fences, to the upside. I consider today a moderate move higher, perhaps a 3rd of 4th tier day. Many of you are having the time of you lives, locked and loaded all of the trash that was discarded towards the end of the New Year. Boastfully, you took said trash and polished it off and proudly put it on your mantle for the world to see. Just one week ago, the world would have laughed at you, calling you all sorts of derogatory names for proudly displaying such offal. But today you are an economist, a man able to see far into the future. A man of substance.

As for me, I have several more conference calls to partake in today, all to do with first class money management. Without remorse, I have disclosed on numerous occasions my desire to outstrip all of you. By design, I will accomplish this task, yet again, on the eyes of Jupiter, in grotesque fashion this year. My winship will be delivered continuously and belligerently, regardless of etiquette. After enduring the pangs of hell in 2011, “The Fly” (aka “The Fry” in China) will majestically rise to the sky, like a gallant Iranian missile in the Persian Gulf, to crush his many enemies in 2012. My only hope is that you do not get in my way, dear friends.

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OFF TO THE RACES

If only for a day, today we will carelessly ballroom dance on the faces of bears. Today is just a day and means nothing as it pertains to the grand scheme of things. However, it’s always nice to see the speculators out and running, even if it equals penalty to my TZA position.

Some of you are upset over my 2012 predictions, which are decidedly dire. But who takes that sort of thing seriously? It’s a wonderful thing to sip from a mug of decadence, filled with black tea infused with bergamot oils, watching the news change the course of history. I am objectively honest enough with myself to know my limitations in making forecasts. It would be folly for me to trade off such predictions and would most likely yield woe, instead of dough, to my portfolios.

Remember that to build wealth one much keep up a fierce balance sheet, fueled by high income. Investment income is certainly one branch of the money tree and must remain profitable at all times. If you have $500,000 invested in stocks, at the very minimum, you should make 10% per annum, translating into a $50,000 income. I had a lengthly discussion on Twitter last night on this very topic. At the very heart of my question was “how much income do you consider plentiful”?

In my opinion, one needs to clear $70,000 per month in order to be in a position to build real wealth. Some of you are laughing at this idea, since $70,000 per month is either far too little or too much. But it’s a starting point and will allow you to purchase most things in life, sans high luxury islands in the middle east. One thing has become abundantly clear to me, having experienced being with and without money: the more money you make, the higher your expenses go.

At any rate, I have numerous conference calls this morning and feel antsy about getting off to a quick start this year. With 75% long and TZA only in my personal account, I stand to hit the ground running today. Good luck.

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Will You Partake in Discount Buying?

In past years, one of my favorite contrarian strategies was to buy up beaten down large caps, in anticipation the new year would bring forth better fortunes. Last year was the exception to the rule. However, taking a look over the level of carnage imposed onto large caps this year, barring a full collapse, there are some bargains to be had.

Let’s have a look, shall we (WE SHALL!)?

Here are some names that stand out to me, with 2011 percentage loss statistics.

RIMM -75%
AEM -52%
MT -51%
BTU -48%
RCL -47%
GM -45%
JNPR -45%
TCK -42%
UPL -38%
FCX -37%
AVP -37%
SPLS -37%
NTAP -34%
BRCM -31%
GLW -31%
AGU -26%
SU -24%
BHP -22%

If you noticed, I excluded financials. The industry is too opaque and toxic to mention. For the most part, all of the above companies are financially sound, blessed with good balance sheets. Hard times befell the shareholders of those names in 2011 only because they went up so much during 2009 and 2010. If 2011 was a “consolidation” or reversion to the mean year, perhaps 2012 will represent a revival to the animal spirits that made them such good stocks in previous years.

The story of 2012 will be deflation versus inflation. Should the Fed act alongside the ECB to reflate, the above names will soar. However, if my dire predictions of famine and European collapse materializes, deflation will bury the above names, allowing TLT to go up as if it was a dot com circa 1999.

Although it is hard to get the timing of this delicate trade right, as we ebb and flow between these two realities. One thing is certain: there will be no middle ground and someone is going to make a killing by making the right bet.

Flip a coin.

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