This Morning’s Movers and Shakers

futures flat, oil  little higher, gold down, dollars up, europe mildly higher

Higher

YUM +1.8%;beakless chickens, YOKU +22.4%;Chinese govt told BABA to assimilate them, WYNN -9.2%;mad as hell at crazy Chinese,  MAT -2.4%, GE -1.5%, SLB -0.7%; oil sucks, AZN -1.9% FDA horseshit

TWTR popping because Steve Ballmer tweeted he bought some stock (this is some dumb shit)
Good earnings: HSC +2.1%;good guidance, WAL +1.3%, CMA +0.9%, STI +0.8%, HON +0.4% .

M&A news: SFXE +44.2% (CEO Robert F.X. Sillerman discloses a 39% active stake in 13D, suggests he’ll buy the whole damned thing for $3.25, thank you very much)

Revenge of the Oil Men: BP +0.6%, RDS.A +0.5%, TOT +0.5%, .

Random Shit: YGE +15.4% (mystery), PTCT +13.1% (psychotics trade biotech), DY +6.3% (mystery!), NBG +4.3% (another mystery!), ARQL +3.8% (clinical yadda yadda yadda), TTM +1.6% (momo), OXY +1.4% (Reuters spreading scandal about them getting out of N. Dakota, soap opera shit), AFMD +1.3% (momo), BABA +1.3% (Jack Ma is from the govt of China, NVO +1.3% (mystery), MBLY +1.3% (TSLA rumors), SHPG +0.9% (myserious mystery!), WBAI +0.7% (momo), VRX +0.7% (Ackman must be mad, tho), ESPR +0.5% (mom), GOLD +0.4% (Congo bullshit), BIIB +0.3% (CRAMER PUMP)

Analyst stuff: LULU +0.7% (upgraded to Cool Kids from Dorks at Credit Suisse), DECK +0.4% (initiated with Do it at Brean), FEYE +0.3% (initiated with a Now it’s a Buy at DA Davidson)

There were a bunch of other upgrades and downgrades, like BOX, but I didn’t feel like telling you today.

Lower
Shameful Earnings: WYNN -9.2%, EXAC -6.8%, MAT -2.4%, SYRG -1.9%, GE -1.5%, SLB -0.7%, AMD -0.5%
The WYNN Cancer Spreads: LVS -2.9%, MGM -2.9%, MPEL -2.5%.

Miners not so cool this morning: VALE -1.2% ,RIO -1%, ABX -1%, SLV -0.8%, GDX -0.7%, GLD -0.3%.

Random nonsense: ZFGN -28.6% (FDA put them on hold; asked them to stop murdering people), CRZO -5.4% (earnings;dilutive share offering), MYCC -4% (dilution), SAVE -3.8% (no one likes their earnings and all the analysts laughed at them), SLRC -3.7% (who cares, really?), RDUS -2.4% (pullback), AZN -1.9% (FDA stuff), JAH -0.7% (prices a juncket of shares at $49).

Analyst trash talk: NAV -4.2% (downgraded to HORSESHIT from Buy at Longbow)

Many years ago, I kept a small blue radio on my kitchen counter, so that I could listen to NY Met games. Why?

Because, I’m old school like video music box, classroom beatings, and dangerous Halloween nights.

I grew up immersed in baseball. I played it every day of my life, up until the day I quit varsity baseball–because I’d rather spend my time chasing girls than balls. I was always a Mets fan, because my grandfather had been a NY Giants/Brooklyn Dodgers fan, until “those fucking bastards” stabbed him in the heart, as he liked to say. It’s worth noting, Grandpa Fly would argue until he was blue in the face that he never cursed, while cursing during his heated defense.

“I don’t fucking curse; you god damned liar.”

At any rate, I was very content with the Mets of the 80’s, cocaine addicts playing ball hard, punching the opposing team in the face, just because they could.

Then 2007 happened, a collapse of biblical proportions. The NY Mets ceded a 7 game lead with just 17 games to go, to the bastard Phillies. I will never forget the anguish I felt when they were eliminated from contention. It was like a death in the family occurred and some Yankee traitor, Willie Randolph, was presiding over the funeral arrangements. It was a dark time for Le Fly and his blue radio.

The following year the Mets collapsed in almost the same end of year fashion. After that, I was no longer a baseball fan. I stopped listening to games and I haven’t visited the field since. As a matter of fact, I’ve never been to Citi-field. People have offered me free tickets, field level, and I told them to fuck off. You couldn’t pay me to go.

Now the Mets are trying to rope me back into their snare. They are playing an elimination NLDS game tonight, versus those ‘fucking bastard” Dodgers and I am secretly rooting for the Mets to succeed. I want to believe. Hell, it’s the Mets’ stupid slogan, aside from the juvenile “Let’s Go Mets” chant.

If the Mets win tonight, I will take out the blue radio, dust it off, and place it back onto my kitchen counter top. I will wear old jerseys and talk shit to my fellow Yankee fans, who, by the way, were unceremoniously escorted out from playoff contention without a fight.

Two thousand and fifteen has been a year of false starts, faded momentum, and trickery. Let’s see if the Mets can provide me with a much needed respite from the drudgery of this God forsaken stocked market.

I am guessing Moody’s hasn’t seen pictures of Putin riding atop black bears, or swimming with real sharks. Also, I am sure they haven’t seen Putin, bare chested, walking through fields of wheat in the Crimea.

“What once has been the country’s strongest asset, which was the government’s very strong financial position, is now under significant pressure,” Kristin Lindow, senior vice president at the credit-ratings company, said Wednesday in an interview in Moscow. “It doesn’t have a lot of debt, but it also is actively depleting its saving buffers, with very littleprospect in the medium term of rebuilding them.”

It’s worth noting, Russia can run dry of their reserves within two years.

To make up the bulk of next year’s shortfall, the Finance Ministry plans to use 2.1 trillion rubles from one of Russia’s two sovereign wealth funds, and may tap an additional 500 billion rubles from it if needed. Russia may exhaust both of its funds in 16 months to two years if it continues to rely on the $144.2 billion reserves without scaling back budget spending, Finance Minister Anton Siluanov has warned.

Either oil has to skyrocket over the next two years, or Russia really needs a big war. Which do you think is most likely to occur?

Stocks reasserted themselves today, soaring more than 200. This, of course, was predicted by the Exodus algos, which all of you have the priviledge to try now. Email [email protected] for a trial.

In a little more than 1 week, iBankCoin will be hosting a conference, in NYC. We will have guests, people of interest, food, booze, and lots of hot hot coffee.

I’ve also taken liberties to hire live music for the cocktail party, along with Yale Club’s best, highest shelf spirits.

Reserve your place amongst greatness now.

For the day, I made close to 2%, led by the liars at BIDU. My only purchase today was NK.

I added to my NK position.

I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid, there wasn’t any trick of treating taking place in my neighborhood. We’d put on Jason masks and fill book bags with dozens of eggs and then attack other blocks with a maelstrom of poultry embryos that were so plentiful: they’d blot out the sun.

We’d also take shaving cream bottles and attach RAID bug spray caps to them, or aerosol caps, to make the shaving cream spray far and wide, so that we could destroy people with it. Back in my days (extra 80s), eggs were cheap. We didn’t give a shit about them. We’d hit people in the heads with them, and then laugh.

Nowadays, eggs are like caviar, expensive and rare. Thanks to exotic animal diseases, effectively wiping out 50 fucking million chickens this year, egg prices are through the roof– up 52% from the lows of 2015.

Get this, egg prices rose 32% in June alone, and now stand at the absurd price of $2.97 a dozen.

Fuck.

If I was a kid preparing for halloween now, my mother would smack me in the mouth if I asked for 3 bucks so that I could crack some eggs over Joey’s face.

The best way to play this is via CALM. Look at the profit ramp.

Stay $CALM and eat eggs. Sorry I had to say it.

It’ s the country we love to hate. We teach our children to want to fight wars with them, to conquer their ancient cities. Now we are going to buy their stocks.

According to the Gods of Seasonality, there is no better month than October to be long Chinese stocks. Have a look.

See, only eccentrics like me have this data, because I cordoned off ALL chinese stocks and created my own basket: the Chinese Burritos. I did this years ago…before it was popular. Inside Exodus, all members are entreated to view, and to trade at their leisure, the burritos. I usually conjoin my trading of the burritos with a few wanton lies, just to set the mood, to be more authentic with the host country.

Here are most of the stocks, sorted by market cap.

Naturally, my top pick, as well as largest holding, is BIDU– “the Chinese Google”. (lolz)

The EIA just came out with a report that said wee enjoyed a build of 7.56 million barrels of oil, FOR THE WEEK. Consensus was for 2.2 mill.

We all accept this news as par for the course. Which fucking course are you living on? In my world, I can’t fathom who is collecting all of this oil, and why?

Clearly demand isn’t this erratic, so it means the oil was over-supplied. Well…why?

I’ll sit here and wait for answers.

In the meantime, stocks are up. My BIDU is looking good.

iBankCoin has dedicated itself towards the dissemination of news and opinion since 2007. Over the years, I’ve permitted my caprices with the written word to take me off track from time to time, in order to indulge myself and vent and laugh and cry. With the new redesign of the site, I’ve decided to redouble my efforts in provided news and opinion that I would want, providing I wasn’t so damned jaded.

I am sure you’ve noticed a great change in the amount of content coming out of iBC. The bloggers are working tirelessly, toiling away in dark dungeons, to provide you, the reader class, with information that you can use to eventually bankrupt yourselves. On the front page, you will notice a “Breaking News” box filled with headline news. That station is manned by myself and two others, pretty much 20 hours per day. You can follow it on Twitter @iBC_FN, or keep refreshing the screen here at iBC. It’s free and does just as good a job as many paid services.

Markets are higher, early going. But I don’t trust it. The dollar is strong. Crude is weak. And the Yen is tricky.

Nevertheless, Exodus flagged oversold yesterday, so I’m inclined to bet we bounce hard soon.

Get your Exodus free trials now. Email [email protected] for an unfettered look under the hood of the single best market intelligence platform on the market today.

This is unbelievably ridiculous. The GOP are 100% hell bent on destroying the country…in order to “save it.”

“The trend in our projected net resources has continued to be negative,” Lew said. “I respectfully urge Congress to take action as soon as possible, raise the debt limit without delay, and remove an unnecessary threat to our economy.”

According to Lew, the government is pulling in far less money than previously expected (extra recession), which is why the deadline has moved up. After the deadline is reached, the government will have about $30bill left in the bank, far less than what is needed to run the government on a day to day basis.

Daily governmental expenditures often reach $60bill per day.

Great, mark that date on your calender boys and girls. Fucked.