Here Are 2016’s Top Performing IPOs

Earlier this year the IPO market was inexorably shut down. Investment bankers went home depressed, drinking from the bottle, sleeping in the woodshed because their wives put them there. Now with markets lifting again, the pipeline of shit has been lodged from inside the investment banks, spewing a fresh batch of IPOs onto an illiterate public.

Here are some of 2016’s standouts.

China Customer Relations (CCRC), +129%- outsourcing call centers in China. Trump will shut this shit down.
Editas Medicine Inc (EDIT), +120%- a genone editing company. New World order shit right here.
AveXis Inc (AVXS), +114%- gene therapy nonsense.
Proteostasis Therapeutics Inc (PTI), +99%- treatment for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.
Acacia Communications Inc (ACIA), +65%- high speed network equipment.
Intellia Therapeutics Inc (NTLA), +63%- gene editing.
BATS Global Markets Inc (BATS), +46%- electronic stock trading services.

I won’t bother delving into the negative performers. I am trying to filter out all of the negative stuff in my life now and will only report good, happy news (extra namaste). Moreover, whenever the markets trade lower, I will simply turn off the computer, which is the same as the market never declining in the first place.