18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,541 Blog Posts

Inverted the Market and Divided My Portfolio Two Times by Light

Listen to me. Today I peered into the abyss and saw a reflection of my own visage and it frightened me to get the fuck out of there, and so I did. Whilst the lot of you were subjugated by this tape and that continues in the after hours, I deployed the cracked codes of the matrix to my trading account, divided two times by light in order to find the right frequency, and closed out the trading day +11bps, at session highs.

While this doesn’t absolve my behavior for the month of May, a reprehensible month blackened by inferior market calls and sloppy trading, I executed my trades with extreme precision today in a manner and mode befitting of a man in my station.

I’d like you to also know that I am feeling very fine now and my head is clear and my health very excellent.

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