iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,117 Blog Posts

Losing Simply Isn’t an Option For Me

While markets might look somber today, Le Fly continues to win. How, pray tell?

My Quant portfolio is higher by a whopping 64bps, 90bps better than the indices. I kick people in the heads for a living.

Anyone can partake. My strategies are open to the public and are updated once per month. If you have money in the market and retain the services of a “financial advisor” in 2018, you are a complete idiot. Do yourselves a favor and fire your broker and take control of your money. They suck.

In my trading account, I’m heavily long retail now: M, BOOT, SFIX, and DECK. Other positions that are notably strong today include APPF, SRAX, EVBG, and VNET.

Into the bell, I am 20% cash, 100% win.

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I’M KING RETAIL

Since my last post, my powers within the retail sector have increased. Thanks to my new status as boss of all shopping malls, some of my competitors are salty AF.

Nevertheless, I beat on — boats against the current.

To conclude my retail exposure, I stepped in and bought SFIX. This is the tech portion of the play, very nice and thin — believe me.

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Look at Me, I’m a Retail Expert Now

Feeling good and positive, in spite of the indices dour and somber look, I upped my retail exposure and bought some BOOT and DECK.

I’m an expert in retail now, an authority on all things to do with spending money inside shopping malls.

Mostly everything is dead, sans retail. It’s possible that I am top ticking here, which is part and parcel of trying to chase momentum. But given the apparent resurgence in the sector, I am willing to gamble there will be some follow thru on this leg higher.

If not, stops will be tight, roughly 5-10% below basis.

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We’re Going Shopping! Long $M

Death to Sears; Death to JC Penney — long live Macy’s.

Every Macy’s I’ve ever been to, with exception to the giant one in NYC, was a heaping pile of shit. I much prefer Nordstrom’s or Saks — but I digress. Normal people, especially the poor, love Macy’s. They bring their small children there, with their happy little lives, and buy garments with fanciful names on them — logos and socks. They always buy lots of “designer” socks.

All that being said, M is breaking out now, as markets Mcplunge lower. You’d be wise to take a good look at M — especially since the summer months are a good occasion to be long retail.

Fun fact: Macy’s has booked its first back to back YOY quarterly revenue growth numbers since 2013.

Retail is back, apparently.

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Good Morning; “The Fly” Wins Again

Any of you familiar with Buridian’s Ass paradox? It describes a donkey in between some food and water, unable to choose, dying due to thirst and famine. Many of you fribble away at the market in the same manner — making an ass out of oneself, unable to choose between right and wrong, between good and evil.

“The Fly” is the exact opposite, always and eternally filled with a cornucopia of ideas, based and steeped in the richest of morals — both hazardous and adventurous simultaneously. I readily slap people in the faces with the hottest slices of pizza, for betting against me and losing. While on many occasions, I flip coins at the homeless, because I am both generous and warm hearted — wholly interested in the betterment of mankind.

I come to you now with estimable honor to tell you that I won again. I know, this repetitiveness can get a bit boorish, and jealously gets us nowhere; but it’s true and I think it’s important that you know it — in order to pass these tales onto future generations — describing a man who once lived on the internets who always won, slayed markets at will, and he did it for the people.

After all, I am but a river to my people — a clean source of nourishment that quenches the thirst of millions of donkeys in need of sustenance. Without me, countless people, and families alike, would perish from indecision, abject poverty and a whirring and dizzying panorama of failure that would inflict trauma upon future generations. In a sense, “The Fly” is a financial super hero in great need of a cape — sashaying to and fro — saving those in need to financial guidance.

I am ~40% cash eager to buy dips. See you in Exodus.

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Trump is Good As Long As Markets Keep Going Higher

It must be incredibly frustrating for bears who are positioning for political uncertainty. Traditionally, the shit that’s taking place now, scandal after scandal and trade wars, would produce a toxic environment for stocks. You know it and I know it.

I used to say the Fed was keeping markets afloat with their tricky ways; but not anymore. They’re out of the way, even being dicks by jacking up interest rates whenever they get itchy.

So why are markets higher? What the fuck is going on?

Well, this recovery was planted in the ground before Trump got into office. The very evil Obama is the one who presided over the recovery and corporate profits were heading higher. When Trump got into office, he sort of stumbled upon a great happening and then super charged it with some regulation and tax cuts. The market isn’t being run by nice charts and technical breakouts, like some of your more inane market ‘experts’ might have you believe. It is being fueled by corporate profits — even in the retailers.

Because earnings and free cash flow are up, so are stocks. And because of that very fact, a certain Donald J. Trump is safe from the gallows and all of the people who want to see him there. If markets crash and become miserable for big business, he’s a goner.

Even more incredulous — if markets are up in 2020 and he runs again, in spite of the frenzy in the media and blue check marks on Twitter, he’ll get reelected and torment half the country for another 4 years of shit-posting.

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I Bought a New Stock and Nothing Can Stop It

Prove me wrong. Trades in Exodus are emailed and texted in real time. This is winship delivered to you daily, with the occasional XIV black swan event.

Introducing RP, my latest pick. Unstoppable.

Today’s purchases include VNET, FAS, and RP. Holding ~40% cash. I’ll chill for a few hours — maybe nibble on something before the bell.

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Market Wants MOAR: Bought $FAS

I gorilla glued a triple upside bankster ETF to my portfolio, looking for a breakout above $70 and open field running with no socks — clear to $80.

When it happens, you’ll be crying in your shower for missing out, believe me.

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I’M FUCKING HARVESTING MY CROPS

This is what we do in Exodus all day every day — non-stop winning with extreme perversion.

Booked 8 winning trades, including my infamous triple sized IQ position — which was a touch over 17% of assets. Mind you, it was a 14% victory. You tried to stop me — but you failed. Now die.

Now that I have a fuckload of cash, I’ll be taking my time to reenter the market — opting to take a fresh look at things, post crop harvest. I’m a rich man now and nothing you can say can derail me. My next slew of positions will only increase my power and strength. Why, you should fear what I’m going to do next.

Maybe stop reading this now, else you might soil yourself.

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Fly Buy: $VNET

Nasdaq is down — but I don’t give a fuck.

I’m buying piece of shit Chinese stocks — because nothing says “try to stop me” like doing that.

My stocks are mostly lower, sans SMAR and RNG — but I’m eagerly optimistic!

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