iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
16,537 Blog Posts

The Stock Gods Giveth Back Half of Yesterday’s NASDAQIRI Gains

It’s unfortunate, but half of yesterday’s grandiose gains have been depleted from the matrix of the market. Goldman Sachs has taken them, along with your money, and deposited them into their vaults.

Good news, however, 33 banks ‘aced’ the Fed’s stress test — providing buoyancy to certain bank shares.

Here are today’s winners in the banking sector.

I wouldn’t worry all that much about this market. It’s merely shitposting, wasting time, like the President of the United States. Summer is here, expect nothing spectacular.

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Trump Unloads on ‘Low IQ Mika’ and ‘Psycho Joe’ TMZ Style

Ladies and gentlemen, you get the President you deserve. America has earned the right to have Trump in office, launching petty, personal, attacks on low rated talk show hosts — because that’s what we’ve become: gossip mongering bitches who enjoy drama.

The President of the United States just tweeted this.

In response, Mika tweeted this.

Happy Thursday.

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CNN Melts Down Over Trump Complimenting Female Reporter’s Smile

Controversial and regular guest on CNN, Symone Sanders, melted down on a panel of guests today, who converged to discuss today’s impeachable offense. During a call with the PM or Ireland, the vaginal grabbing President had the audacity, as well as the gall, to compliment one of the Irish reporters, telling her that she had a nice smile.

Sanders exploded: “Let me tell you something. I would describe this as how Donald Trump always acts when there are women in the room. It was condescending. It was just creepy. Why is the President of the United States picking out reporters, who just happen to be aesthetically pleasing, calling them over and telling them they have a nice smile. It’s just absolutely disgusting.”

Here is Trump telling a member of the opposite sex that she had a nice smile — and CNN’s reaction.

Let’s recap Trump’s crimes again, especially for new readers.

He worked with Russian hackers to access John Podesta’s email box, revealing the DNC to be the corrupt organization we’ve all grown to adore.
After becoming President, he took two scoops of iced cream, while everyone else took only one.
He fired Comey and called Flynn ‘a good guy.’ Clearly, collusion — execute all involved.
He obstructed justice by claiming to have tapes. He had zero tapes. Impeach now.
He didn’t enjoy a Ramadan dinner — something of a tradition in the White House.
He might get a chance to nominate a second supreme court justice.
He has yet to release his taxes.

And now, he complimented an ‘aesthetically pleasing’ female about her smile.

We cannot allow this chicanery to continue. When is the earliest Trump can sign the impeachment papers and get done with it?

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A Sober Look at the Current Commodity Rally

Commodity stocks bounced off their tombstones over the past few days and everyone is now declaring the Trump rally is back. I am here to give you some hot hot black coffee, showing you the reality of the commodity sector.

Inside Exodus, I have a commodity index up that I track. Here were today’s best performers. Note the YTD returns on the far right? Yeah, the sector is still off by 5% for the year, on a median basis.

Here is a chart of the index, which topped out in 2014 and again in February of 2017.

And here is a 1 yr view of commodity stock action. Notice the fierce rally post election, subsequent February top, and flaccid price action since March. This is a sector that has been dead money since February. If you’re buying in now, you better hope the stock action is followed up by substantive news, otherwise this rally will be revoked.

Good news for Option Addict fans. We will be launching an iBC Financial Video Library soon, featuring all of Jeff’s Bootcamp videos, which are timeless. They will be available for purchase by the end of this week, early next week at the latest. For anyone who had missed on Jeff’s classic educational boot camps, this is a great way to catch up and purchase the lessons a la carte.

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Dennis Gartman Says Lift in Crude a ‘Dead Cat Bounce’; Oil Will Eventually Be ‘Worthless’

The Commodity King, Dennis Gartman, is doubling down on his anti-oil rhetoric, repeating the fairy tale that oil is heading to zero. I don’t know why the CNBC let’s him get away with it.

How does it feel to know that all of your oil stocks will eventually be worth $00.00?

Both crude and drillers moved higher by 1% today, obviously a dead cat bounce.

Sell now while you still have the chance, lads.

NOTE: What the fuck is up with Gartman’s hands in that triangle formation?

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What They’re Not Telling You About Trump’s Fake Time Magazine Cover

The media is having a field day today, bemused by the revelation that Trump has a fake Time Magazine cover of himself in 5 of his clubs. Mika, from The Morning Joe, had a grande time this morning, mocking and ridiculing the ‘needy’ President for this shocking revelation, saying ‘this is your boss.’

She prefaced his diatribe by saying ‘Trump was so needy that he had not been on Time yet that he made is own’, calling the Time cover ‘phony’, ‘fake’ and ‘pathetic.’


Fake Time Magazine cover of Trump

Watch.

The only problem with Mika’s reporting is that it’s false. Shocker, eh?

Here’s Trump on Time Magazine, 1989.

Why does Trump have a fake Time Cover in his clubs, when in fact there was a real one in existence? God only knows. It was probably done in jest, garnered a few laughs, and tossed up on his club walls to keep the meme going. The fact that this is news today, just after CNN got busted for admitting to publishing fake news, is probably not a coincidence.

Here are some other Time Trump covers.

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SHORT SQUEEZES ARE BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH: HERE ARE SOME WORTH REVIEWING

The market is ripping off tits to the upside. Back in the old days, when I was a younger lad, I’d circumvent my way into stocks that were heavily shorted — using my buying power and the money of friends to spark a short squeeze. In upward surging markets, stocks that are heavily shorted enjoy a two fold boon: natural buyers and those scrambling to cover their shorts. Hence, the net result often leads to stocks screaming higher — inflicting pain and misery to those stuck short.

According to Exodus, the following stocks are heavily shorted and are ranked amongst the highest in the market now — technically speaking.

RH
WTW
ESPR
VSH
WAB
PRLB
PII
WAC
CENX
JUNO
ONCE
EXAS

It looks like biotech stocks are setting up for a big run. We’ve been seeing all sorts of drug stocks break out, like VRX, in spite of ‘healthcare reform.’ The markets knows.

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JOY EXPLODES ALL OVER WALL STREET; STOCKS BATHE IN IT

God forbid the NASDAQ should climb another 40 points, I’m destined to face plant into a vat of ketchup, according to promises made in my previous post.

A Large Marge rally is underway on Wall Street today, airlifted by Trump stocks. We are seeing a continuation of the post election rally — tech stocks staggering while steel, copper, banks, construction and oil stocks surge.

Look no further than CLF to get a feel how the Trump trade is doing. Coking coal for steel is in the good grace of the Lord today — a Trumpion play on making America great again.

Tech darling NVDA is bouncing by 2% too, so everyone is happy, generally speaking.

Ethereum fags are having the time of their lives, as the faux store of value presses its gains, now up 30% for the day.

Dollar weakness, bond yields slightly lower and 80% of stocks are up — everyone is happy.

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Ethereum Explodes Higher; Stocks Set to Steady the Ship

I’ve been wrong about cryptocurrencies since the day I found out about them. As long as they survive , I will continue to be wrong about them. I don’t get it and will never invest in them. Having said that, a totally normal bounce of +26% has occurred in Ethereum today — the world’s second largest cryptocurrency. Look at all these totally normal moves.

Markets are set to rebound today, getting back some of yesterday’s lost sauce. Since we lost 100 NASDAQS yesterday, I think it’s fair to say it’d take one heck of a rally today to get it all back. As a matter of fact, if we rallied 100 NASDAQS today, I’d face plant myself into a vat of ketchup — just for the hell of it.

Goldman upgraded their forecast for the SPY this year to 2,400 from 2,300.

Interesting side note, the President is shitposting about AMZN this morning — thanks to Jeff Bezos’ relationship (owner) with the fake newspaper, Washington Post.

In the world of politics, this is all you need to know for this morning.

Following yesterday’s drubbing, you’d like to see the market lift by 30-40 NASDAQS. Worst case scenario, NASDAQ lifts by 15, fades away and then turns red. That would lead to a rout of monumental proportions. Remember, because the market has been so easy to buy and hold, there are a lot of rank amateurs embedded at these levels. Those people would take flight at the first sign of weakness. They are the proverbial ‘weak hands.’ They exacerbate sell offs — because they’re indecorous, disgusting, vile creature — and lack gumption.

I’d be encouraged if tech led the way today and Macy’s face planted into a vat of ketchup.

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New Polls Suggest the People of the World Hate Trump — IMPEACH THE ORANGE ORB NOW!!!

Enough of this charade. The people of the world have spoken, and just 22% of asked by Pew Research have confidence in President Trump — down from Obama’s stellar 64%. More than that, the only two nations in the world where Trump was more popular than Obama was Russia (shocker!) and Israel.

Why doesn’t Trump move to Jerusalem and become President there? He seems to love that wall so much — plus he’d be closer to his friends in Russia.

He loves walls.

Our dear friend from MSNBC, the impartial Chris Mathews, weighs in on this new impeachable offense.

Let’s recap Trump’s crimes.

He worked with Russian hackers to access John Podesta’s email box, revealing the DNC to be the corrupt organization we’ve all grown to adore.
After becoming President, he took two scoops of iced cream, while everyone else took only one.
He fired Comey and called Flynn ‘a good guy.’ Clearly, collusion — execute all involved.
He obstructed justice by claiming to have tapes. He had zero tapes. Impeach now.
He didn’t enjoy a Ramadan dinner — something of a tradition in the White House.
He might get a chance to nominate a second supreme court justice.
He has yet to release his taxes.

This orange orangutan must leave the White House to make way for the whitest man to ever live — Mike Pence. He’s so white, his hair is white. His stance of electrocuting gays until they turn back to normal is somewhat alarming — but I feel we can work with him in making America somewhat good again.

This greatness business is arduous, hard work, and environmentally unfriendly.

For the sake of the people of the world, in spite of Russia and Israel, we must impeach Trump now.

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