iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,465 Blog Posts

Take it Like a Man

Fuck running away from losses. Stand there, like a fucking man (even if you are a woman), and take the hits. It’s one fucking day, you ADD addled, ritalin taking homo—no offense to gay guys of course. Look for GDP estimates to come tumbling down, due to obvious signs of hitting a wall. Because of this factoid, the markets will get raped in September. However, that does not mean we cannot “feed the troll” before Wall Street’s veterans get back from their summer vacations. Take advantage of the stupid junior trading robots at Goldman, while you can. Those junior robots are stupid and have 1/5th of the microprocessors of their superior senior robot overlords.

Having said that, like my personal idol, George Bush, I am “going it alone,” long biased into a fucking weekend. ROFL. Ask me if I am scared; I fucking dare you.

As the clowns on CNBC monger around, like little peasants in Thai rice fields, “The Fly” is poolside, sipping on a cold glass of gasoline. Look, I got money to burn, motherfucker. Let rates collapse and foreclosures spike; I will only get richer.

As for this tape: it is bounded by the laws of mathematics to trade higher, before trading lower. Losses are expected and acceptable. Set backs are part and parcel of being an investor/trader. Do not fear the loss, embrace it. Hug it like it was your favorite stuffed animal, strapped with lit dynamite sticks. If you are scared, hedge your portfolios. I’ve been telling you to do that for months, ever since we entered the meat grinder. The fact that the markets are still above 10,000 is a fucking blessing, considering how low yields are. The upside, the silver lining if you will of rates being so low, is room for upside. Should bonds get hit, money will come flooding into equities, like a fucking Tsunami high on twenty eight balls of cocaine. If that shit doesn’t happen, well then, we’re fucked.

Happy trading.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vN7HQrgakZU 616 500]

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Ironically, Caught in the Vortex

All of my warnings about “doing the Hugh Hendry” and “getting caught in the deflationary vortex” has come to fruition, only this time with me in it. Granted, my losses could be greater, if I was “all in” long. But, they are enough to make me want to throw pickles at my screen. On a personal note, I am “all in” long, with exception to cash, which makes today’s “dip” so much more “eventful” and comedic. While it’s true, I can afford to lose a little, since I’ve made so much. I DON’T LIKE FUCKING LOSSES.

I offer no change to my strategy, only to suggest something is “fishy as fuck,” with TLT crossing over the rubicon line of sanity. Rates are going to zero and I want my 30 year mortgage at 1%.

Off to go for a walk.

NOTE
: Rub some VXX on your chest, if you are feeling under the weather—asshole.

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Merger Thursday?

What the fuck is wrong with INTC management, buying MFE at such a lofty premium? They’ve raped their own shareholders, while gifting the founder/head gambler of MFE with an absurd payday. Then again, WTF do I know?

I am just days away from heading to the west coast, where I will terrorize iBC partner/blogger Spydercrusher aka Danny and throw molotov cocktails into the decadent offices of Howard Lindzon aka a man interested in “hedging” his own health. Asshat! Basically, I’ve been working too hard and find myself somewhat tired of the daily grind. As you well know, “The Fly” is the hardest working man on the planet, even more so than illegal Mexicans and entry level applicants at FOXCONN.

DO NOT FEAR, for I will blog while on vacation.

As for this tape:

It doesn’t feel right. I get the sense we are due for a little drop here. However, that’s okay, if your timeframe is longer than 6 hours. Relax and chill the fuck out. Your account balance is supposed to fluctuate. You will drive yourself crazy if you watch the valuations on an hour by hour basis. Where do you want to see your account by 10/1? Set your goal and work towards that goal, as if you were a distinguished gentleman, something we both know you certainly are not.

As for me, I remain, stubbornly, hedged—with a long bias. I expect to make less and lose less.

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I.Don’t.Care.

This market can plummet 2,000 points tomorrow, sending my TNA and all of my other longs down 50% and I wouldn’t give a shit. I’d probably throw a few pickles at my screen; but that’s the game, fuckface. Win some, lose some. At the end of the day, I make my bed and I lay in it. I am long biased until this cycle peaks. When it does, I will try to make some coin on the downside. If I don’t, I will die trying.

Seeing late day weakness, ahead of tomorrow’s economic data, makes me want to sell some stocks. But then I realize how small minded I am being, by making a fucking mountain out of a small mole hill. It’s hard to remember to think BIG, while talking to a bunch of fucking smurfs. If that’s the case, call me “Papa Smurf” and fetch me my slippers.

Into the bell, Le Fly will be zipping through the NYC streets, not really giving a fuck about life, stocks or anything else for that matter.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRhI92kWDKo 616 500]

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Fully Invested

My cash position is down to a measly 10%, with today’s foray into BAC. I believe this is a good bounce to trade, which is why I am balls deep long. However, I still hold my VXX position, which will erode some of my gains. On a personal level, as discussed last week, I am all in long, via fucktarded 3x ETF funds and CRS/FTK/AXL positions.

My near term target for the S&P 500 is higher than where it is trading now. I will release some of my longs, as we get into OVERBOUGHT territory. For now, I will kick-back and enjoy the ride.

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Buy the Dip

Attention Asshole Dip Buyers of America,

It makes no sense to buy stocks now, which is why you must. Under the O’bama administration, all males between the ages of 11-99 must participate in the experiment called “fucked up capitalism,” through purchases of shares via a government sponsored agent, most preferably at JPM or GS. As you know, our operators are scheduled to bring GM public again, in order to further enrich the already deep pockets of our institutional client base. You, as an honest tax paying American, must tell friends and family to buy GM cars, so that our institutional client base may sell their newly minted IPO certs at a handsome profit, as dictated by none other than Emperor O’Bama, Lord of the Saviors of America, Chief Indian of the Welltodo Tribes.

Precipitously,

Anonymous

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhafyxV1Res 616 500]

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Simply Too Dramatic

The Drama Queens are out and about this morning, worrying about everything. TLT is simply through the roof, defying all of your silly notions of inflation. And, the currency situation is a small mess again, with yen and dollar strength/euro weakness. With oil down and TGT sucking dick, it is possible to see some weakness permeate today’s tape; but is it probable. What’s important for you to consider, at this very moment in time: is someone trying to steal from you?

Why, I think if you’d investigate, you might conclude: indeed they are!

We are sort of programmed to ignore anything that happens in the summer and discard it as “typical August bullshit”; are we not? But the things that are transpiring are very real, which leads me to my next point. What the fuck is gold doing at these lofty levels? And, secondly, why is the market pricing in both inflation and deflation? Talk about basket case.

Taking all of this into account, I’ve concluded one thing: the market is simply too dramatic. It’s plain ol’ vanilla gay and you really should not think about it too much, else you might die from an aneurysm rupture on your aorta. For now, put the macro stuff on the back burner and focus on price action. That’s the only thing that is real: the price something is selling for right now.

With my money, I will hold onto recent longs, as my belief system values the notion of a trade-able bounce, despite this mornings weakness—precipitated by a TLT spike. Nonetheless, I still have my insurance policy, via VXX, out there, in the event this market starts to get gay again.

In short, watch out for an upside reversal.

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Late Night Knowledge

“I am the punishment of God…If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you.”

-BEAS, 1310

“The greatest happiness is to vanquish your enemies, to chase them before you, to rob them of their wealth, to see those dear to them bathed in tears, to clasp to your bosom their wives and daughters.”

-BEAS, 1311

“It is not sufficient that I suceed – all others must fail.”

-BEAS, 1312

Goodnight.

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Gasoline on Your Face

You motherfuckers got “zero-hedged” because you’re in this game for politics. I am in this to kill you, via large directional bets provided by your bullshit margin liquidations. For the record, I sold out of EDC, for a quick profit. I sold it because it isn’t priority. I am holding onto all longs, until the shadows near my favorite urinal start smoking menthol cigarettes again. Last I checked, those bastards were smoking Pall Malls sans filter.

I will push the envelope on my longs, just like I press my bets against your career as a professional money manager. While it’s true, I am not a big game hunter. I still kill a lot.

Into the bell, for novelty, I added to my FTK position.

Top picks: CBL, AXL, CRS, BUCY

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwLolBSqKC0 616 500]

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Too Late, Dipshit

If you missed this run, due to it “not feeling right,” it is too late to chase the market here. Although we could run another 1-2% higher from current levels, the risk-reward is no longer one sided. “The Fly” is only interested in high probability trades.

Having said that, I am interested in booking profits on recent longs, but not today. I endeavor to do so sometime tomorrow, or when The PPT flags OVERBOUGHT.

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