GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK

On the anniversary of the 1987 crash, the market crashes? Come on with this fucking horseshit. When was the last time the market fell by more than 200? It just had to drop today, out of all days, as a way to fuck with people.

I’m getting lit up, seven figure losses, down more than 3% for the day, led by everything. Miraculously, coal and the homies are holding their ground– but it doesn’t matter.

The sick, perverted, stock Gods have decided to play a prank on us by pulling the strings out from the marionette, leaving us without a captain to direct the ship. Consequently, it’s down, down, down for the market and the fucktards, such as myself, who are long.

Gone are the days of yesterday when mocking the bears for being “stupid fucking retards” was fashionable. Today the bears are celebrating, decked out in their finest burlap’d costumes, dining on the livers of overzealous longs.

VIX is spiking and so is TLT. It’s a classic “risk off” day, which if history is of any use will be short lived.

Fuck the crash of 1987. I remember that day as if it was yesterday, running around my stupid apartment, dodging cockroaches. I was 11 years old in 1987, an avid investor in all things to do with baseball cards and the occasional football variety.

Some of you are well aware of the caution flags exhibited inside of The PPT yesterday and the day prior. I take get pride when saying “I am in possession of a time machine, gentlemen. Would you like to go for a ride?”

We’re coming off an OVERBOUGHT condition, flagged two days. My position is one of supreme elegance, spitting in the faces of those who are short VHC. My FFIV position is higher too; but everything else in my chambers is lower, decidedly so. Current cash position, following yesterday’s sales, stands at 15%. My best guess, based upon the non-negotiable laws of mathematics of the sublime nature, is for the market to head lower over the next 5-7 days, as prophesied inside of the halls of The PPT.

10/17/12

10/18/12

As of now, I have zero exposure to the other black gold, aka coal. It’s not that I don’t love coal or possess amorous thoughts regarding the wonderful state of West Virginia. It’s just that, frankly, mining for money in coal is tiresome. I need me a break, unwind a bit, enjoy the scenery.

Don’t worry, should coal drop a bit, I’ll be right back in the mine with the rest of you.

Futures are lower; but I stand to make some of my fucking money back in FFIV today, off the RVBD numbers.

My top picks are MCP, VHC, FFIV and APKT.

As you were.

The market is fixed on the idiocy that is GOOG. However, “The Fly” and his cohorts have been quietly buying very large blocks of stock in VHC, MCP and TC. There’s no need to beat around the bushes and tell you half truths. The simple fact here is I stand to make a great deal of money in VHC. My edge is much sharper than yours.

All of you fucktards are selling short VHC based upon a hope and prayer. You have no idea how their lawsuit is going to be viewed. I bet you haven’t peered into the brief cases of the plaintiff–like The Devil. Similar to the countless graves that were filled with the bodies of wrong-headed biotech shorts into FDA decapitation, you too will find yourselves to be in dire straights on the opposing end of VHC.

Moving on, I’m hearing supply constraints, due to legal matters, will continue to limit the supply of rare earths. Also, whispers of Chinese hoarding and/or re-accleration of growth, most readily measured by the increase in met coal plays, might help the shares of MCP and TC in the short term.

I cleaned house today, selling DDD, JIVE and CLF. With the proceeds, I bought in large into MCP, TC and VHC. Don’t forget, I have a rather dramatic sized position in DECK, FFIV and APKT too.

“The Fly” is a simple man, only interested in receiving the very minimum treasure to live out his life in modest luxury and sterling volubility.

I’ve had it with these cute technology companies. The energy conservers over at GOOG just shit the shower, with an impromptu earnings catastrophe, which inadvertently was released without top hat. For the love of bankrupt social media venture capitalists, these companies need to be reigned the fuck in. All of these internet companies are run by children. They’re small fools who play with billions of dollars, generally fucking up their investors along the way.

Granted, GOOG has been a long term winner, despite missing EPS by $1.62 with a “Pearl Harbor” style mid-day attack. But how many other asshat corporations have ruined people? Let’s run down the list: ZNGA, GRPN, FB, LOCK, JIVE, OPEN, BCOV, P, NFLX, AWAY, SFLY, ANGI. I could go on.

The new wave of technology is UN-INVESTABLE. Wait until the companies fire their founders and allow adults to manage them.

In case you were wondering, yes, GOOG is receiving an emergency Asshat of the Quarter award. Congrats.

I bought size in both MCP and VHC, courtesy of The Devil.

UPDATE: I bought TC

I sold out of CLF, JIVE and DDD, winning in CLF, losing in JIVE and breaking even in DDD. With those sales, I am now 50% cash, looking to redeploy assets specific to my bias.

Who benefits from a ‘non-global warming’ type of winter? Say for example it was actually cold this coming winter, with snow and all, what stocks stand to benefit?

The obvious is retail. From boots to heavy cable knit sweaters, people will flock to M, JCP, KSS, PLCE, TJX to buy shit from DECK, COLM and RL.

Also, let’s not forget what the cold does to automobiles. Maintenance is expensive. A cold winter benefits AZO, PBY, ORLY and AAP.

Energy is the obvious winner, from XOM to WNR. But there are some under the radar stocks who have benefitted from colder climes, such as MIND. But the obvious beneficiaries are companies that produce electricity and companies who deliver coal to said utilities. Companies like CLF, ACI, ANR, JRCC, WLT, OXF, CLD and BTU will win, alongside FE, CNP, ED, PPL and AEE. Ancillary winners of a coal rush will be JOY and CAT.

Natural gas plays include UPL, ECA and RRC.

NKE, CROX, UA and CF will no longer get to enjoy “extended seasonality” for their warmer weather products, as the winter winds shut them the fuck down. Homebuilders lose too, as people shut themselves in, frightened of the cold, shunning the specter of buying new homes.

Rails win, through the delivery of coal. Stocks like CSX, UNP, GBX, RAIL and NSC will–once again–enjoy doing business during the colder months of the year–providing citizens of America with the fuel needed to keep them alive. Providing they stay in business, OSG benefits too.

Lastly, we need to acknowledge the existence of snow in this country, traditionally in abundance from November through February. For snow, I offer you two plays: CMP to eliminate it and PII to ride on top of it at your favorite MTN resort.

Three items of business.

1. Sneak peek into Le Fly’s new house.

2. Check out this new/awesome energy drink

3. Aside from the obvious coal plays (BTU, JRCC, ACI, ANR, WLT, CNX, JOY), the following coal/coal related stocks are worth your perusal.
YZC, OXF, GBX, LLEN, RAIL, CLD, CSX.

And this research note from Sterne Agee.

There’s pressure to buy, pressure to chase performance. Less than 10% of hedge funds are beating the indexes. Believe you me, there will be a race to get into “cheap names”, especially those with big short positions, into the holiday season.

After all, if you’re not going to buy stocks going into Thanksgiving, in a year when the market is +15%, what the fuck are you in the market for?

We’re cutting off dicks for the remainder of the year, gentlemen. The guillotines are now stationed inside of the city square, chopping off anatomy at a furious rate. Sack up and get in, else find yourself on the receiving end of a “dick blade.”