EMERGENCY ASSHAT OF THE QUARTER AWARD: $GOOG

I’ve had it with these cute technology companies. The energy conservers over at GOOG just shit the shower, with an impromptu earnings catastrophe, which inadvertently was released without top hat. For the love of bankrupt social media venture capitalists, these companies need to be reigned the fuck in. All of these internet companies are run by children. They’re small fools who play with billions of dollars, generally fucking up their investors along the way.

Granted, GOOG has been a long term winner, despite missing EPS by $1.62 with a “Pearl Harbor” style mid-day attack. But how many other asshat corporations have ruined people? Let’s run down the list: ZNGA, GRPN, FB, LOCK, JIVE, OPEN, BCOV, P, NFLX, AWAY, SFLY, ANGI. I could go on.

The new wave of technology is UN-INVESTABLE. Wait until the companies fire their founders and allow adults to manage them.

In case you were wondering, yes, GOOG is receiving an emergency Asshat of the Quarter award. Congrats.

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2 comments

41 Responses to EMERGENCY ASSHAT OF THE QUARTER AWARD: $GOOG

lol says:

Just saw that, glad I wasn’t long, that is absolutely terrible. Traders waiting until end of day to close out trade before earnings got crushed.

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ruggyup says:

“But how many other asshat corporations have ruined people. Let’s run down the list: ZNGA, GRPN, FB, LOCK, JIVE, OPEN, BCOV, P, NFLX, AWAY, SFLY, ANGI. I could go on.” Unless I am sadly mistaken the Supreme Fly made several profitable trades in some of the aforementioned asshats, qualifying him for the legendary ‘chefs’ golden toque’ award.

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en1gma says:

EPIC buying opportunity. I am in with more shares of GOOG as soon trading resumes.

They also released a $249 Chromebook today. Google fucking owns.

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joe says:

theres absolutely no fear in this market whatsoever

we are so overdue for a 10% flash crash, its not even fuckin funny anymore

and i never want to hear a bull cry ever again..ever

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just kidding says:

Fat fingers galore… Google fat fingered the earnings released, the market gets fat fingered, the budget will get fat fingered…
In fact, the only B not getting fat fingered is that B Candy Crowley

There was an “itch” after the B but Candy ate it along with the whole candy factory.

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lol says:

Does trading based on leaked earnings information everyone has access to publicly before official earnings constitute insider trading? Doubt it, but just saying.

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TMoe says:

” everyone has access to publicly ”

means it is not insider info – dumbass

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lol says:

obviously, but there were several who got that information before everyone else because it wasn’t given by official usual channels at the same time.

Otherwise what’s to prevent the guy making a “mistake” and selling it the very second after that information is released?

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lol says:

Just prior to the moment the purchase or sale is made, leak information when it’s not supposed to be leaked. “plausible deniability”. “oops, I shouldn’t have done that, but information is released now, so I might as well act on it”
Or
“Oops, I (the CEO) intentionally/accidentally bankrupted my company and just happened to leak that information early and subsequently buy as many puts as I could get my hands on while the news was available but before the news was widely distributed. Technically the information wasn’t “inside” information as others had access to it, but I was still able to take advantage of the temporary inefficiency and make a boatload before the market reacted”

Reply
TraderCaddy says:

Uh Oh.
The major financials which were holding this tap up with tape and glue have now gone negative and the dollar is up v euro.
Hang on folks.
The tradebots are warming up.

Reply
xxxHuggieBearxxx says:

They got me. The finally got me to go all in after 6 weeks and here comes the drama. Fuck 2012.

Reply
wilmer says:

You were so close man. I cringed a bit the other day when you said you were close to break even for the year. Jinxed yourself. Sorry bud.

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TraderCaddy says:

I would hang tough for awhile.
Piper Jaffray and Citi are keeping their buy and outperform.
As usually happens there will be a quick plunge (may have already happened) with late comers panicking and then a sharp turn up.
That may be the time to get out.

Reply
xxxHuggieBearxxx says:

caddy i’m goign to hang tough through next week…a source i trust says we are going to challenge the highs next week.

Reply
DaveyNC says:

Fucking Googlers. Can somebody explain to me how GOOG shitting the shower can crash a f’n coal company? Stopped me out of ANR today, about an hour after I bought it.

Reply

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