iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
20,619 Blog Posts

BLM BAILS OUT LE FLY — TRADING LIKE A TRUE MASTER IS NOT ONLY A RIGHT, BUT A PASTIME

I was having a decent day in the markets. Recall, I have 50% of my money in the Exodus QUANT, which RAMPAGED THE FUCK HIGHER today for a substantial +4.2%. That pretty much negated yesterday’s losses — so fuck yourself.

Then late in the day, NEWS HIT THE TAPE, that Trump wanted to buy off Black Americans to the tune of $500b, in what he calls an investment in Black America. It is The Godfather of all gibs and that shit, mind you, made black owned businesses that publicly trade — RAMPAGE THE FUCK HIGHER.

Lucky for me, as you can see above, I have a BLM index in Stocklabs and 1,000 traders in the Pelican Room, an army if you will, at my disposal. We got in heavily into those fucking bastards and I fleeced the market for +16% in BYFC and +20% in UONEK and hold CARV into Monday’s jubilee.

In all, I finished the day +2.4% in my trading, +4.2% in my Quant. In other words, Le Fly is entirely back and yesterday’s foray into misery, which with the benefit of hindsight, was nothing more than a way station to greater and much greener pastures.

Have yourselves a fruitful weekend, you fucking faggots. Off to drink some champagne.

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11 comments

  1. maxx2000

    Ah.. well done sir, on cannot keep a good man down. Best of weekends to one and all.

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  2. rigged game

    The smart guys on CNBC are looking for a FAST 20% DOWN for
    the market. You should quit fuckin’ around with the nickle-dime
    day trades and put half your QUANT into SQQQ and SDOW.

    In 3 months, you can stop worrying about $250 to fix the Benz.

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  3. mad marsupial

    This whole thing is going to get so ugly.

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  4. zusch

    does champagne count as booze?

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  5. roguewave

    I just got off the phone with Fritz at the Hofbrau House. He’s Fly’s German IT guy, who filled me in on the events that transpired this morning.

    At approximately 4:03 UTC this morning the StockLabs algorithms became self aware and locked Fritz in the Control Room. His air supply was cut.

    Simultaneously, Hal (StockLabs insists on being called Hal.) Hal dispatched
    Ed209 ver 2.0 via hoverdrone to seek out and kill the Creator – Le Fly.

    See Ed ver 1.0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFvqDaFpXeM

    Fortunately Fritz was able to break out of the Control Room, power off Hal StockLabs, regain control of the OSC (Orbital Space Cannon) and obliterate Ed209’s hoverdrone before it could complete it’s deadly mission.

    Fritz will take some well-deserved time off next week to celebrate Oktoberfest!

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  6. ericbakerbruce

    Good day iBankCoin shills
    42
    I just named
    The number of times
    I farted in bed last night
    It smelled of
    Avocados and fish heads

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