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18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
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Trump to Ban Mercedes Benzes From Driving Down 5th Avenue; Trump Slaps Mexico, Canada With Steel Tariffs — The Fun Continues

In today’s edition of fake news, Trump apparently told France’s Macron that he was going to stop those pesky Mercedes Benzes from driving down 5th avenue, implying he’d slap the shit out of Germany with tariffs.

The catamites at CNBC are quick to disseminate.

President Donald Trump is preparing to block German luxury carmakers from the U.S. market, according to an exclusive report by German magazine WirtschaftsWoche.

Citing several unnamed U.S. and European diplomats, the weekly business magazine reported that Trump told French President Emmanuel Macron last month he would maintain his trade policy with the aim of stopping Mercedes-Benz models from driving down Fifth Avenue in New York. The report didn’t give any further details on what polices would be used to effectively ban the premium carmakers.

The report comes less than two weeks after the U.S. Department of Commerce launched an investigation into automobile imports to determine whether they “threaten to impair the national security” of the U.S. That could lead to tariffs of up to 25 percent on the same “national security” grounds used to impose metal imports charges in March.

Europe’s autos sector was trading lower shortly after the report was published Thursday, with German automakers leading the losses during mid-morning deals. Shares of Daimler, Porsche and Volkswagen were all trading off around 1 percent on the news.

Volkswagen was not immediately available for comment when contacted by CNBC Thursday, while Daimler refused to issue a statement.

The White House did not immediately respond to CNBC’s request for comment.

In other news, Trump is also crushing the people of Mexico and Canada, by imposing evil taxes on steel and aluminum. It is widely rumored that both nations will need to find other things to do with their time now, such as farm for maple syrup or make pinatas in the shape of donkeys, in order to make ends meet.

The United States is likely to impose steel and aluminum tariffs on Canada, Mexico and the EU Thursday, according to a source familiar with the decision.

The source, who preferred to remain anonymous due to the sensitivity of the situation, said the tariff decision is coming this morning and is “99.9” percent done. The U.S. expects the EU will retaliate in due course.

Metal producers in the countries affected had been granted a temporary exemption from the tariffs earlier this year, but they are due to expire Friday.

The tariffs were originally announced on March 1 when President Donald Trump said that the United States was being treated unfairly.

“People have no idea how badly our country has been treated by other countries. By people representing us who didn’t have a clue,” Trump said, arguing that trade trends “destroyed” American steel and aluminum industries.

On Wednesday, a trade delegation led by U.S. Commerce Secretary, Wilbur Ross, met with European Union counterparts in Paris but those talks appear to have failed.

Prior to the expected announcement, the French Finance Minister, Bruno Le Maire, said Thursday that Europe would take “all necessary measures” to respond. The EU has previously said it will impose its own tariffs on U.S. products such as motorcycles and jeans.

Also, Morgan Stanley downgraded MU this morning — because they have no idea what they’re doing and wanted some press.

Nasdaq futs are +10, WTI -1%, Eurostoxx 50 +0.4% and the Euro is +0.3% — because the Italians have been put in their fucking place — back in the kitchen and the garden, where they belong.

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2 comments

  1. mad marsupial

    I had to look up “catamites”. Too funny.

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  2. soupbone

    Saucy ain’t he. Aluminum is a stretch too far. The bauxite from Jamaica requires massive amounts of electricity to reduce to Al plus deep water ports hence the industry is parked beside hydroelectric dams.

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