I have a model that quantitatively allocates money amongst certain stocks, based on a given criteria, using the Exodus engines. My criteria seeks alpha and doesn’t permit underperformance. Moreover, it demands risk hedges, via GLD and TLT, if they’re outperforming the quintiles of equities I have pre-selected.
Because of this, I allocated 10% of my assets in GLD and TLT, equal weighting, and will reassess the market next Friday for reentry back into stocks.
I want nothing more than to be long, running in the long, green fields, naked — eating apples and hammed burgers. But it wasn’t meant to be, sadly. Until that day beckons, I’ll be here, in the darkest corner of the ark, floating the seven seas in search of bounty.
Markets look weak, but not weak enough to warrant a mean reversion trade. Because of this limbo, I recommend to do nothing, or get defensive.
I want all of you political faggots to lighten up. It’s Friday, markets are at record highs, and entertainment is in abundance, is it not? The drama is thickening (if that’s even possible) this morning after FBI reports countermanding Trump’s claims that Comey requested to dine with him, while also telling him on three separate occasions that he was NOT under investigation. The FBI assets that such information would never have been relayed to the President by Comey, obviously because Trump is a Russian agent and it’s important to investigate any and all non-leftists as soon as they enter office.
Before I get to the opus magnus tweet by Trump, let’s review some of this earlier shit-posts from this morning.
The Russians are laughing up their sleeves. Cut it out.
Russia must be laughing up their sleeves watching as the U.S. tears itself apart over a Democrat EXCUSE for losing the election.
Yesterday, on the same day- I had meetings with Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov and the FM of Ukraine, Pavlo Klimkin.#LetsMakePeace! pic.twitter.com/SPiIrJqI6G
And here it is. Trump threatening Comey over apparent leaks suggesting the President was never told he was NOT under investigation, while also invoking Nixon — AGAIN.
James Comey better hope that there are no "tapes" of our conversations before he starts leaking to the press!
Truth is, it will never end. The ride continues and will always continue, as long as he’s in office. His only recourse is to become a swamp drainer of epic proportions, inflict damage upon his enemies and lay traps for all sorts of people — later them exposing them to execution via steam catapult.
For those of you still insisting Trump has Russian ties, need I remind you that he has, in his possession, a ‘certified letter’ stating otherwise?
Bloomberg is reporting on a curious real estate transaction in Chicago and an antenna in an open field, that was erected in order to permit a small group of traders gain a marked advantage over everyone else.
Let’s have a look, shall we?
Tremendous, beautiful antenna, believe me
So you’re wondering, ‘what the fuck is that?’
That nondescript pole on a flat 31 acre plot of undeveloped land is in close proximity to the CME Group. It is owned by a Jump Trading affiliate called ‘World Class Wireless’, who purchased the lot for twice the going rate, or $14m.
The high tech microwave antenna is able to intercept data coming out of the CME before it makes its way to the east coast — creating an arb situation that last microseconds. It is the definition of cheating, rich, powerful people using their position to jimmy rig trades in their favor, all but guaranteed. It’s like having a time machine that can go a microsecond into the future and see prices and then trade off of the knowledge using very sophisticated high speed quants.
Nothing at all wrong with that, right? This reminds of the movie Office Space, where the main actor tried to explain his criminal plan to his girlfriend and merely taking a few pennies out of the penny tray — who couldn’t quite grasp his innocence.
Another virtuous firm, McKay Brothers LLC just won approval to build a microwave tower diagonal to the CME data center — under the name Pierce Broadband LLC — a harmless little telecom company. The approval gives them the right to build a 350ft antenna 600ft closer than their existing one — which could mean all the difference in the world, when attempting to remove pennies from the penny tray.
Webline Holdings is another penny tray grabber — with a ‘license’ to operate a microwave network stretching from the data center all the way to Carteret, NJ, where the Nasdaq data center is located. The trick here is to intercept the signal in Chicago before it gets to New Jersey.
This could all be negated if the CME simply placed a microwave antenna on their roof — all but rendering nearby antennas meaningless. But for some odd reason, they continue to relay data to nearby microwave antennas outside of the data center, which is then stolen by the aforementioned companies above, all for the purposes of rigging markets.
Good evening gentlemen. Over the past few month’s, the left part of the country has been going insane over Russian ties. They believe the only reasonable explanation for Trump’s win over Hillary is because the rotten Russians ‘intervened’ and played king-maker for Vladimir Putin.
Up until now, no one really knew if this was true, definitively. I never thought that the Russians hacked anything, because I viewed it as sour grapes, plus I have ZERO confidence in our ‘intelligence agencies.’ But I didn’t have proof, until now.
President Trump did an interview with LESTER “the molester” HOLT this evening and had this to say.
“I actually asked him” if I were under investigation, Trump said, noting that he spoke with Comey once over dinner and twice by phone.
“I said, if it’s possible would you let me know, am I under investigation? He said, ‘You are not under investigation.'”
“I know I’m not under investigation,” Trump told Holt during the 31-minute White House interview.
“I just want somebody that’s competent,” Trump responded. “I am a big fan of the FBI, I love the FBI.”
But Trump also insisted there was no “collusion between me and my campaign and the Russians.”
“Also, the Russians did not affect the vote.”
“I have no investments in Russia, none whatsoever,” Trump told NBC News. “I don’t have property in Russia. A lot of people thought I owned office buildings in Moscow. I don’t have property in Russia, and I am…in total compliance in every way.”
There it is folks. Serious question for Trump haters out there: how can you recover from this and what charges will you make next? Perhaps pivot back to Russian hookers urinating on his face, or how about him raping a bunch of people — based off his ‘locker room’ talk?
With regard to Comey: there isn’t any room in the Whited House for ‘showboats’ and ‘grandstanders.’ The fuck out of here with that attitude.
“He’s a showboat, he’s grandstander, the FBI has been in turmoil,” Trump said of Comey in his wide-ranging interview with Holt. “You know that, I know that. Everybody knows that. You take a look at the FBI a year ago, it was in virtual turmoil, less than a year ago. It hasn’t recovered from that.”
We’re so lucky to have two Presidents, one in Donald John Trump, the other in Yoel Chaim aka “Jared Kushner”.
Thanks to his astute diplomacy, the House of Saud has agreed to build our bridges and tunnels, allocating $40 billion towards American infrastructure projects — because they love us.
By 2020, Saudi Arabia will have a sovereign wealth fund worth upwards of $2 trillion, taking into consideration the share sale of Saudi Aramco. They intend to invest as much as 50% of the money overseas, compared to just 5% now.
The Kingdom recently inked a deal to invest $45b, as part of a $100 billion venture with Japan’s Softbank. They also dropped $3.5 in Uber last year.
No word on how they intend on ‘cashing in’ on building American highways for us. Perhaps they can set up Islamic tolls across the country — fining women for driving without their veil.
Yesterday I was discussing financial modeling with you rank amateurs. Today I’ll simply point out that if you inserted basic fundamental analysis into your process, you could’ve avoided this from happening to your portfolio.
Plain and simple, retail is in a depression. If you’re gonna add that sector into your quintile of stocks to choose from, be ready for trips into the depths of hell to be beaten senseless by centaurs and well endowed dragons.
Separately, stocks staged a nice comeback, mainly led by tech. Gold was the big standout today. More than 65% of stocks were lower, so it was mainly a money losing session for most.
Markets have risen from session lows after President Trump revealed his balls to the American people, via an interview with NBC where he stated Comey was a goner one way or another. Trump called him a ‘showboat’ a ‘grandstander’ and was going to shit can him regardless of what Rosenstein said.
“Looks he’s a a showboat, he’s a grand-stander, the FBI has been in turmoil. You know that, I know that. Everybody knows that. You take a look at the FBI a year ago, it was in virtual turmoil. Less than a year ago, it hasn’t recovered from that,” exclaims President Trump about Comey during an interview with NBC News’ Lester Holt.
This is clearly bullshit, since the White House all but blamed the whole thing on ROSENSTEIN yesterday, suggesting that the new deputy AG hated Comey so much he wanted his kids to starve out with Dad on the unemployment line.
Early this morning, fake news outlet, Washington Post, reported that Rosenstein was so pissed off for being tossed into the streets for the Comey shit canning, he threatened to resigned.
Trump revealed that his eminence isn’t to be trifled with. He can fire who he wants, at the time of his choosing.
Additionally, he also revealed that he asked Comey if he was under investigation for being a Russian mole.
“We had a very nice dinner and at that time he told me you’re not under investigation,” Trump said. In a subsequent phone call, Trump said, “I actually asked him. He said, ‘you are not under investigation.”’
This is a brilliant tactical move, very 4d chess like. By painting himself as lord commander, employer in chief of all, democrats now have to stop looking for smoke and start trying to question the authority of the President.
The White House Press Secretary filling in for Spicer, who by the way is terrific, said the President can fire whoever the fuck he wants, when he wants.
***UPDATE: The DOJ is denying Rosenstein threatened to quit. This might be a case of fake news by Washpo.
Pardon the lack of interactive content in today’s blogs. I’m working from a hotel lobby on my dated iPhone.
Some of today’s important developments include a Washpo report suggesting the Deputy AG Rod Rosenstein threatens to quit over the Comey firing. Apparently, he took exception to the fact that he was being painted as the villain in all this. Truth be told, the White House should’ve just said we fired Comey for a fuuckload of reason, one of which was Rosenstein’s hatred and acrimonious seething anger towards Comey.
What the fuck did Jim ever do to Rod?
I believe this uncertainty is causing markets to sell off. This is a distraction that could derail some of Trump’s economic reforms.
The Nasdaq is feeling it most, off by 50+.
I think sentiment is getting hammered due to the collapse in SNAP too, this year’s tech darling. Amusingly, the lead underwriter of the deal, Goldman Ballsachs, is out defending them.
“While SNAP remains a near venture stage investment with all of the risks that implies, we continue to believe its audience and engagement represent a unique asset that will benefit from growth and diversification of internet usage and advertiser adoption as both mature,” Goldman analyst Heath Terry wrote in a note to clients Thursday.
Terry reiterated his $27 price target for Snap, representing 45 percent upside from Thursday’s price.
Stocks are heading into a meat grinder, at least in the early going. I’m sure we can concoct some sort of narrative for you to blame it on — but is it necessary? For the love of god, the VIX hit single digits. We are long overdue an absolute catastrophe; I’m talking about a six-sigma event — fire, brimstone. Mr. Devil Dog at your service.
Frankly, it couldn’t happen at a better time, as I am 100% cash — waiting to reallocate funds this Friday.
On the other hand, commodities are super-strong — with oil, copper and silver all higher by 1%.
But the degeneracy is all in the bitcoins this morning, once again. All of the venture capital shills are heavily long and will force this fucking thing down your scrawny throats, if it’s the last thing they do.
It is higher by 4.6% to $1,866.
Conversely, the pound is lower by 0.66%. I suppose fuckers just learned of BREXIT.
We’ll try to limit the amount of political posts today to less than 50% the normal rate. But before you little trollops sashay into work, GET IN HERE and explain this shit.
The President is very upset with you ball-handlers. Apparently, and this is him speaking not me, you’re all a bunch of rotten hypocrites. Proving it, our President provided the world with video evidence, proving how drunken stupid the democrats are, in regards to the James Comey situation.
Dems have been complaining for months & months about Dir. Comey. Now that he has been fired they PRETEND to be aggrieved. Phony hypocrites!
