iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,441 Blog Posts

It’s a Good Day to Be a Banker

If you are baffled by this rally it is because you do not own any bank stocks. If you do not own any bank stocks, you are a normal person. Mr. Dimon, from JPM, won again, completely fucking any and all shorts who bet against him into earnings. Do not lament over your positions lagging behind, for the market itself is in great health and condition. It will only be a matter of time before your stupid stocks increase in value.

I am up today; but my gains are measured. It doesn’t really matter, frankly. Either way, I expected my holdings to be little changed whether the market was +180 or -180. What’s important to note and remember is the overall trend.

Good Sir, we are decidedly higher and have melted the faces off of our enemies and now design to use them as wax for our banquet room candles.

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24 comments

  1. Mike

    EXK giving back yesterdays gains….wtf?

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    • The Fly

      In elementary school they must’ve taught you basic arithmetic.

      Let’s review.

      EXK’s gain from yesterday +0.27
      EXK’s loss from today -0.08

      Net gain stands at +0.19

      Any questions?

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  2. Steve Johnson

    Mr. Fly, you are very witty. Unfortunately my portfolio is crushing you today. I learned to bet with Dimon and not against him, something you obviously a day you missed in elementary school. +2.06 today thanks to plays in financials, RUSL and XIV.

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  3. The Equalizer

    Damn it feels good to be a banksta!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROlDmux7Tk4

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    • Dirk Diggler

      Did you just hear the real song on Pandora too?

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      • The Equalizer

        LOL. No, but I did queue it up locally.

        I’m having fun watching $VHC today. I love the sound of guillotines in the morning. Sounds like – ka-chunk – victory.

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        • Dirk Diggler

          VHC’s style is impetuous. It’s defense is impregnable, and it’s just ferocious.

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          • Caffeinated

            I’d love to Digg this, but nobody does that anymore.

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  4. Montrose

    “Good Sir, we are decidedly higher and have melted the faces off of our enemies and now design to use them as wax for our banquet room candles.”

    You sure can turn a nice phrase.

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  5. Mr. President

    TITN

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  6. xxxHuggieBearxxx
    xxxHuggieBearxxx

    I shudda been a banker.

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    • Caffeinated

      Yes, it would be amusing to see a banker usually riding in the FAZmobile

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  7. flyaway18

    I’d love to buy some F5 on this drop because of analyst revision estimate. I just don’t know if it’s worth a stab at starting a position so close to earnings.

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  8. Mr. President

    For the record, Mr. Chainz would like me to tell Mr. Le Fly:

    “I wuhk in ani turnup. Pockets fulla hunnuhs.”

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  9. TMoe

    Nice look today Mandy on cnbc

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    • alvari40

      Iunno – she is getting that Karen Carpenter look to her on certain angles.

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  10. republikat

    There is a Fly screen in PPT from July 11th titled “Strong Banks”:

    These stocks are climbing like a chimp on meth -> they also have bad ass charts

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  11. luke

    Everyone on here and on twitter is getting all giddy after today. Next week will definitely be a time to get bearish.

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  12. Trading_Nymph

    I am baffled over this rally today. All I saw was a major buyer of eur/usd to 1.2250 early in the day, Market spiked, Oil Spiked…but why wasn’t it dumped into the close??? Eur/USD closed below 1.2250, yet we didn’t pull back…all sort of silly.

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