iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
19,909 Blog Posts

The Shoe is on the Other Foot, For Now

For the first time in iBC history, I am requesting you give me a market update. Where I am, there is no such thing as iPhones and normal carriers, only roaming shit that makes the transfer of data cumbersome. My only outlet to information, or a phone, is via the apartment I am renting.

I request the following:

Full market update, not just the bearish stuff CRONKITE has been posting lately. And, I want to hear all of the lovely rumors being purported by the dicksuckers on Twitter.

As for me, I am getting my conch and George Hamilton on. By the time I leave here, people will think I am native. Shit is so expensive out here, you’d think it was exclusive for rich folk only. Oh, wait, it is reserved for rich folk only.

For the day, I shed 2.1%—mostly thanks to DECK and WNR.

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40 comments

  1. goose

    Shares of Dell were down nearly eight percent in after-hours trading after the Texas-based PC maker posted lower-than-expected second-quarter results. Still, the company’s revenue was up one percent over last year, totaling $15.66 billion, compared to $15.5 billion in Q2 2010. Net income jumped 63 percent, from $545 million to $890 million, over the year-ago quarter. Corporate and government orders were responsible for the jump in income, according to an AP report, but new sales predictions hint that orders may not be coming in as often as anticipated. Dell expects modest growth of one to five percent for the full year — citing “a more uncertain demand environment” — compared to previous estimates of five to nine percent growth.

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  2. go2mars

    The guy from family feud enthusiastically said “BAM!”.
    Then, more than a decade later…

    Dow closed down 77. Gold 1786. Silver 39.95.

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  3. GYSC

    Everything was fine until the twin terrors Merkel/Sarkozy failed to deliver a 3 trillion euro ESF and had the gall to propose a trading tax!

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  4. The Hippy Dippy Dip Buyer
    The Hippy Dippy Dip Buyer

    Oil at 0. Oh wait. $87ish. Nat Gas 3.90. S&P 1193.95.

    -Hippy

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  5. go2mars

    MOO (mooncor) up 9%,
    HAT down 1.7%
    Millrock up 7%
    Crew down 2%
    ROK down 2.6%
    DEI down 3.8%
    Soltoro up 2.5%

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  6. go2mars

    Germany and France planning to do that “4th Reich thing”. They want the unelected President of the EU to destroy the notion national sovereignty. In the ass.

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    • razorsedge

      the new leader is an 18 yr old punk named zitler

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    • go2mars

      Headline: “Germany, France propose collective ‘government’ for the eurozone led by EU president.”
      In conjunction with noise about the Swiss Franc getting pegged to the Euro;
      The implications = years more bought time before the system collapse.

      The frogs won’t even notice the water heating up. Eh comrade?

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  7. The Fly

    Just heard Chess’s summary. Perfect.

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  8. La Fayette

    rich folk staying where there isn’t wifi? does not compute

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    • The Fly

      How the fuck do you think I am writing this, dipshit?

      Go get another beginners course in reading 101.

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    • GYSC

      Fly writes down his words and a local runs 3 miles to the internet cafe at the local army base and sends it in. Simple.

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      • dishobgyn

        no disrespect but it does not make sense. you can post on the blog. even ban people but you can not get the business reports and news. hmmmmmm. is this a test?

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  9. DENIS

    NO CLUE WHY JUST TOOK A LOOK AT AFTER MARKET SPY WAS -.90 AT CLOSE NOW -1.16. SO SHIT MUST BE GOING DOWN BUT I SEE NO MAJOR NEWS ON WEB, COURSE FEW SHARES CAN MOVE IT IN PRE OR POST BUT STILL LOOKS LIKE DOWN TOMORROW AT LEAST AT OPEN

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    • DRAXWIN

      come on now, indices could swing around 200 points before the open tomorrow. flip a coin. i think we rally tomorrow, I am big holder WNR, that’s how I came across this site. well I day trade the shit out of it ,but am holding lol. sold the whole boat @ 17.7 today and bot alll the way down to 16.85.

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  10. razorsedge

    do u think that maybe we could alelviate, some of this with an energy plan? say NAT GAS?

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    • DRAXWIN

      YES NATTY! NEED TO BURN MORE NATTY!!!! SICK OF THIS “SHALE BITCH” IN MY FACE ALL DAY

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  11. razorsedge

    alleviate, i know

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  12. logicalthought

    >>Shit is so expensive out here, you’d think it was exclusive for rich folk only. Oh, wait, it is reserved for rich folk only.<<

    REALLY "rich folk" have satellite Internet & phone connections… Lol, sounds to me as if you might be vacationing out of your league!

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  13. silentmax

    shit are you in china? behind the gfw? why no twitter there?

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  14. 4fl3x

    OpEx this week, so I’m assuming there won’t be any low volume melt ups.

    Stay long if we gap over /ES 1202 in the morning. Cancel your plane ticket home if the /NQ gaps below 2175.

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  15. JakeGint

    This reminds me of that part of the Livermore biography when he cancels his fishing vacation off the (then very primitive) Florida coast so he can hop a train back to a ticker.

    And you think YOU have information technology problems?

    ________

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  16. lil homie

    Fly I am not trying to talk shit but that’s the way it suppose to be when your out there chilling on an island. Fuck the market for now. Just relax and get you some drinks and kick it with your lovely lady. The dam market will be there when you get back just let the good times roll.

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    • JakeGint

      That’s nice of you, but…

      Are you kidding me??

      __________

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      • DRAXWIN

        YEA just relax man, have another drink while you blow up.sitting at the bar with a bunch of losers, I used to be a trader,it’s a tough racket…..
        (opening scene glengary glenross)

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  17. Bernard Madoff

    As requested by Mr. Fly, a stock market update: WebVan and Pets.com announced a merger after hours and both rose about 48%. Mr. Fly. If you are interested I can get you the before merger price as it comes from my inventory.
    WNR announced a 50-1 reverse split after the news hit the wires about “soft” steel being discovered in their normally erect hardened pipeline. Oil is leaking from the pipeline and threatens to destroy the Sky City Indian Casino as well as the International UFO Museum and Research Center in Roswell. WNR plunged after the news.
    DECK also dived in the after hours when it was disclosed that all of their shoes are made by children in sweatshops in Guangdong and Hainan China. DECK denied the charges and said that they were adult Taiwanese midgets.
    If interested in the WebVan and Pets.com purchase please send the money to me at: Bernard Madoff, Chief Legal Counsel, No: 65425, Butner, NC.

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  18. thewife

    I have done so much traveling in places just like where you are now. I know EXACTLY how it goes. …So common in so many of those places. That is part of the whole scheme…they want you to get into island time..relax bradah….which may not be a bad idea. Some islands are better than others for reception but the more exclusive ones seem to have the worst phone service for data. You are out to dinner in some fabulous restaurant such that you have to wear long pants and closed toed shoes…on and ISLAND for goodness sakes and yet they have lousy smart phone roaming services. It’s much easier to refresh one site and get everything you need than it is to surf the net.

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  19. robert

    Ha! You must be staying at the sister property of my feb canadian vacation.

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  20. SUBCOMANDANTE CHINCHINILLA!!!!!
    SUBCOMANDANTE CHINCHINILLA!!!!!

    Get the Professor to whip you up some coconut wireless, and make sure you tell Gilligan to steer clear of Ginger cuz that ho has a nasty infection.

    Don’t ask me how I know, but I do, and the little buddy’s been warned.

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  21. GonzoT

    Are you at Juggalu island?

    Market is tryin,,,,typical oversold bounce.. no new high today in the spy… but printed a lower low and a fucked up looking doji cross… shit that cant be good.

    A bounce to 1260 SPX. wold not be out of the question here.

    EUR gonna suck large amounts of cock if they put though QE or debasing scheme that Sir Fly will be the true start of currency world war 1,, we are fucked no matter what..

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  22. GravestoneDoji

    Europe is going to cold cock these markets once and for all at some point. ESFS isn’t going to be enough, Germans and French bailing while their own boats sinking? LOL. Germany almost zero growth, France at zero, Cramer sputtering about SocGen (we don’t know what we don’t know…), and the rest of the Eurozone a disaster movie waiting for a script.

    Signed,

    Waiting for Deus Ex Machina

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  23. Jules Steinhardt
    Jules Steinhardt

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  24. GravestoneDoji

    OT but funny…Ron Paul…the 13th floor of the GOP…

    http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-august-15-2011/indecision-2012—corn-polled-edition—ron-paul—the-top-tier

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