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Five Fast Food Items You Won’t Find in the U.S.

HU SHENG/EPA/CORBIS
Kids dressed as Colonel Sanders in Shanghai, China

It’d be nice to think you’d never settle for fast food when traveling abroad, but anyone who has logged significant mileage outside the U.S. knows that flight delays, language barriers, a sudden lack of funds, and other hiccups have a way of sabotaging even the greatest dietary intentions.

In other words: Sometimes you gotta eat McDonald’s.

One way to allay the guilt is by ordering an item specific to the country you’re visiting, rather than one of the many homogenized foods you can buy back home. It’s still fast food, of course, but at least it’s culturally relevant fast food.

To whet your appetite, here’s a sampling of five U.S. chains’ most unique overseas offerings.

Foie Gras Rossini Burger: Wendy’s in Japan
This wallet-shocking $16 sandwich is the highlight of the recently unveiled premium menu at Wendy’s restaurants in Japan. It’s pretty much what it sounds like: a square hunk of beef piled high with all the usual fixings (lettuce, tomato, red onion), plus a slab of buttery-rich foie gras. Anti-foie crusaders can try the Truffle and Porcini Grilled Chicken Sandwich instead—priced to move at just $12.50 a pop.

Patbingsoo: Burger King in South Korea
The chain’s spin on this popular shaved-ice dessert comprises sweet azuki beans, heavy cream, soft-serve ice cream, fruit cocktail, sliced strawberries, and sugary condensed milk. It’s the perfect chaser for BK’s Bulgogi Burger, a flame-broiled beef patty smothered in garlicky Korean barbecue sauce, padded with raw onions, and served on a sesame seed bun.

Der Nürnburger: McDonald’s in Germany
Three fat bratwursts snuggled up with bacon underneath a blanket of gooey orange cheese. Mmmm… mmmm… heart attack?

Golden Fortune: Pizza Hut in Malaysia
Commercials for this loaded Malay pie show it uniting estranged family members and giving lonely widows a reason to live. And why not? It’s piled fist-thick with crispy tempura king prawns, slivers of crab meat, some kind of unidentified “fish,” juicy pineapple chunks, and lime wedges. But it’s the pizza’s calorific cheese-stuffed dough ring—a.k.a. “crowns of cheesy liquid gold”—that really steals the spotlight. All of which makes Pizza Hut’s old Russian heavyweight, the Moskva (pizza heaped with sardines, tuna, mackerel, salmon, and onions), look positively wussy by comparison.

Egg Tarts: KFC in China 
Gifting your loved one a box of these two-bite custard-y pastries on Valentine’s Day has become all the rage in China, Thailand, and other Southeast Asian countries, thanks mostly to a major push by Western marketers last year. Bloggers consistently rave that these flaky desserts are “to die for.” Split some with your significant other on a romantic date, along with a duo of shrimp burgers, side order of bacon mushroom chicken rice, and steaming bowl of congee with pickles.

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Federal Appeals Court Rules Prop. 8 Ban On Gay Marriage Unconstitutional

via SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) — A three-judge panel of the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled Tuesday that Proposition 8, California’s voter-approved ban on same-sex marriage, is unconstitutional because it violates the 14th Amendment guarantee of equal protection under the law.

But backers of the controversial, voter-approved law quickly signaled that they planned to appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court.

The court ruled 2-1 to uphold the decision of a lower court judge, U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker of San Francisco, who determined in Aug. 2010 that Prop. 8 was a violation of the civil rights of gays and lesbians. The panel also rejected claims that Walker, now retired, was biased in his ruling because he is gay and in a long-term relationship with another man.

 
“Although the Constitution permits communities to enact most laws they believe to be desirable, it requires that there be at least a legitimate reason for the passage of a law that treats different classes of people differently. There was no such reason that Proposition 8 could have been enacted,” the ruling stated.

 

Judge Stephen Reinhardt, the author of the majority opinion, went on to write: “Proposition 8 serves no purpose, and has no effect, other than to lessen the status and human dignity of gays and lesbians in California, and to officially reclassify their relationships and families as inferior to those of opposite-sex couples. The Constitution simply does not allow for laws of this sort.”

RELATED CONTENT:
Download The Complete Court Ruling (.pdf)
pDownload A Summary Of The Decision (.pdf)

Reihardt, who was appointed to the appeals court by President Jimmy Carter, was joined in the majority opinion by Judge Michael Hawkins, an appointee of President Bill Clinton.

Judge Randy Smith, who was appointed by President George W. Bush, dissented, saying he disagreed that Prop. 8 served no purpose other than to treat gays and lesbians as second-class citizens.

KCBS’ Doug Sovern Reports:

Prop. 8 Ruled Unconstitutional

 

Tuesday’s ruling did not mean, however, that gay marriages would resume in California anytime soon as the decision of the three judges appeared to pave the way for a likely Supreme Court showdown over the issue.

“No court should presume to redefine marriage. No court should undercut the democratic process by taking the power to preserve marriage out of the hands of the people,” Brian Raum, one of the lawyers hired to defend Prop. 8, said in an e-mail sent to CBS San Francisco.

“We are not surprised that this Hollywood-orchestrated attack on marriage — tried in San Francisco — turned out this way. But we are confident that the expressed will of the American people in favor of marriage will be upheld at the Supreme Court,” Raum added.

 
Margaret Russell, a professor of constitutional law at Santa Clara University School of Law, told CBS San Francisco that the Supreme Court did not need a conflicting circuit-court decision in order to take up the case, but rather just four justices who deem it worthy of review.

 

Prop. 8 passed with 52 percent of the vote in 2008 and outlawed same-sex marriages just five months after they became legal in California. Two same-sex couples then brought a lawsuit in 2009 seeking to overturn the measure.

PHOTO GALLERY: The Proposition 8 Court Battle

American Foundation for Equal Rights President Chad Griffin, who formed the legal team that waged the court battle on behalf of the two couples, called the three-judge panel’s ruling “a historic victory.”

More than 150 people who gathered outside the federal courthouse at Mission and Seventh streets in downtown San Francisco also greeted ruling with cheers. They held signs and waved rainbow flags.

California Attorney General Kamala Harris hailed the decision too. In a statement sent to CBS San Francisco, she called it “a victory for fairness, a victory for equality and a victory for justice.”

The Attorney General’s Office had declined to defend Prop. 8 in court, leaving it in the hands of proponents of the measure to mount a defense, after concluding that the law could not be defended on constitutional grounds.

Gov. Jerry Brown, who also refused to defend the measure, issued a statement in which he said, “The court has rendered a powerful affirmation of the right of same-sex couples to marry. I applaud the wisdom and courage of this decision.”

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Obama Flip-Flops and Now Supports Super PAC

via CNN

In a change of position, Barack Obama’s reelection campaign will begin using administration and campaign aides to fundraise for Priorities USA Action, a super PAC backing the president.

Obama has been an outspoken critic of current campaign financing laws, in particular a Supreme Court ruling that allowed the creation of super PACs. Until now he has kept his distance from Priorities USA Action.

Follow the Ticker on Twitter: @PoliticalTicker

But in the wake of the group’s anemic fundraising, made public last week, the campaign decided to change its position, and announced the new stance to members of its national finance committee Monday evening.

Two Obama campaign aides confirmed that senior campaign and administration officials who participate at fundraising events for the president’s campaign will also appear at events for Priorities USA Action, the PAC supporting Obama.

“This decision was not made overnight,” one campaign official said. “ The money raised and spent by Republican super PACs is very telling. We will not unilaterally disarm.”

The president, first lady Michelle Obama, Vice President Joe Biden and Dr. Jill Biden will not appear at super PAC events, the aides said.

In an e-mail to supporters, Obama campaign manager Jim Messina said the decision was a reaction to massive fundraising posted by super PACs supporting GOP presidential candidates.

“The campaign has decided to do what we can, consistent with the law, to support Priorities USA in its effort to counter the weight of the GOP Super PACs,” Messina wrote.

“We will do so only in the knowledge and with the expectation that all of its donations will be fully disclosed as required by law to the Federal Election Commission.”

Messina was careful to point out the president’s opposition to a Supreme Court ruling that sparked the onset of super PACs, noting the administration was still looking for ways to put limits on campaign spending.

“The President opposed the Citizens United decision,” Messina wrote. “He understood that with the dramatic growth in opportunities to raise and spend unlimited special-interest money, we would see new strategies to hide it from public view.

“He continues to support a law to force full disclosure of all funding intended to influence our elections, a reform that was blocked in 2010 by a unanimous Republican filibuster in the U.S. Senate. And the President favors action – by constitutional amendment, if necessary – to place reasonable limits on all such spending.”

Priorities USA Action posted receipts of $4.4 million through December 31, 2011, compared to the more than $30 million reported by Restore our Future, a super PAC supporting former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney.

In an e-mail blast, Jonathan Collegio, spokesman for the conservative groups American Crossroads and Crossroads GPS, called the Obama campaign’s move a “brazenly cynical” reversal for a president who just two years ago called spending by these outside groups a threat to democracy.

Collegio highlighted a quote from an October 2010 rally in Philadelphia, when the New York Times quoted Obama as saying, “You don’t know, it could be the oil industry, it could be the insurance industry, it could even be foreign-owned corporations. You don’t know because they don’t have to disclose. Now that’s not just a threat to Democrats, that’s a threat to our democracy.”

American Crossroads and Crossroads GPS plan to raise $300 million to help defeat Obama and his agenda in November.

Mitt Romney’s super PAC reported raising $30 million in 2011, the vast majority of which was spent on negative advertising.

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IRONY: Mark Zuckerberg Would Like IPO Banks to Protect Privacy

via NY POST

Shut your pie hole!

That’s the message that notoriously press-averse Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg has sent around Wall Street recently, telling Morgan Stanley, JPMorgan Chase, Goldman Sachs and the other banks involved in his company’s $100 billion IPO to stop leaking juicy tidbits to the media and to stop talking up the stock offering to clients, The Post has learned.

Zuckerberg, 27, whose stake in the social network giant amounts, in round figures, to around $28 billion, wasn’t too happy that some aspects of the much-anticipated initial stock float — including the fact that its filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission would take place on Feb. 1 — were disclosed. Facebook officials let the bankers know about it through phone calls and e-mails, sources said.

Facebook officials also appeared to also be irked about what appeared to be subtle sniping in the press between Morgan Stanley and Goldman Sachs centered on which firm would grab the coveted lead underwriting role on the IPO — the highest profile since Google went public with a $1.7 billion offering back 2004.

Zuckerberg’s warning appears to be working.

The powers that be at each bank, sources said, have reacted by warning employees not to discuss the filing.

“[Facebook] wants to be taken seriously and viewed as a blue-ship company,” said one bank official familiar with the listing, but not authorized to speak publicly.

Facebook and its team of underwriters are in a so-called quiet period since filing the paperwork, known as an S-1, with regulators.

Although the Facebook e-mails and calls contained no threats, running afoul of Zuckerberg could result in a bank getting dropped from the IPO. Just two years ago, UBS was dumped from the group of banks handling General Motors’ much-anticipated IPO.

For the banks, the Facebook IPO means more than just the $40 million it could earn from the deal. Indeed, landing the prestigious Facebook offering is likely to have a halo effect that could help a bank land future tech IPOs. Getting booted from the deal can have the same halo effect — in reverse.

At lead underwriter Morgan Stanley, the reaction to Facebook’s warning has been quick and unambiguous. Its private wealth advisers were admonished to stay mum on the upcoming IPO — a difficult task considering clients are clamoring to get in on the action.

The hush-hush mandate comes as the underwriters are gearing up in the coming week or two to hash over — with Zuckerberg, CFO David Ebersman and COO Sheryl Sandberg — the most appropriate valuation for the Menlo Park, Calif., company.

Despite the white-knuckle media frenzy surrounding Facebook, underwriters will be aiming to hit a sweet spot of offering the social media giant’s shares at a level that deep-pocketed institutional investors can wrap their head and their wallets around.

A $100 billion valuation for the IPO would peg Facebook at an eye-popping 100 times its profits of $1 billion in 2011.
Read more: http://trade.cc/ahyb

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$MGM Grand Renovating to Become a Hot Hotel on Las Vegas Strip

(via examiner.com)

As we announced in an October 2011 article , MGM Grand is undergoing a major renovation project in Las Vegas. New faces will adorn rooms, bathrooms, elevators, hallways, and the central rotunda area.

The hotel has just installed a full – scale mockup of their new standard King rooms in the main lobby for folks to check out. The rooms feature a neutral pallette of beige, brown, and panda color schemes. Other features include 42″ LCD televisions, LEED certified carpeting, Caesarstone motif platforms, and a desk nook table with chairs.

Though the bathroom facelift is not presented in the lobby mockup, baths will feature new hardware, lighting, new door handles and hinges, new paint, shower fixtures, curved curtain rods, and “electric” mirrors.

We phoned the hotel to confirm that some of the new rooms are indeed available for booking. Midweek rates for a two – queenbed room on December 22, 2011 were quoted at $75 per night plus taxes and resort fees ( grand total of $106.40 ). That nightly rate is about $20 more than the quoted going rate ($55) for their old standard rooms. Even though we’re currently right in the middle of the lowest average annual room rate windows for Las Vegas, the mere $20 disparity in old vs new room rates is quite encouraging.

MGM Grand has always been on our favorite Vegas hotel lists for several reasons. The new rooms at very reasonable rates only adds to the property’s Grand appeal. Stay updated on the progressing property – wide renovation by visiting The Grand Renovation website.

Cool…

Cheers…

Charles Higgins

Article info source = Vegas Chatter


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Teacher Says She Wishes Her Students Dead; Judge Says She Can Keep Teaching

(via NY POST)

A Brooklyn teacher — fired for posting snarky online comments suggesting her unruly students should drown — can go back to the classroom, a judge says.

Manhattan Supreme Court Judge Barbara Jaffe last week overturned an administrative decision to boot Christine Rubino, who taught at PS 203 in Flatlands, for posting “repulsive” comments on Facebook.

A blow to the city Department of Education, the ruling underscores the grueling process to fire teachers accused of misconduct or incompetence. Even after lengthy administrative trials, judges can reverse decisions either way, and prolong a costly battle.

Cuomo's Challenge
SHE’S A CRASS ACT: Kid-hating teacher Christine Rubino is getting her job back, thanks to a state judge.

HELAYNE SEIDMAN
SHE’S A CRASS ACT: Kid-hating teacher Christine Rubino is getting her job back, thanks to a state judge.

“After today, I’m thinking the beach sounds like a wonderful idea for my 5th graders. I HATE THEIR GUTS! They are all the devils spawn!” Rubino wrote on Facebook on June 23, 2010.

She made the remarks one day after a 12-year-old Harlem girl, Nicole Suriel, drowned on a school trip to a Long Island beach.

When a Facebook friend asked, “oh you would let little Kwame float away!’’ Rubino posted in reply, “Yes, I wld not throw a life jacket in for a million!!”

While “offensive” and “repulsive,” the comments were posted outside the school building and after hours, Jaffe ruled.

The judge found no evidence that Rubino, frustrated by her students’ rowdy behavior, meant them actual harm or that the comments “affected her ability to teach.”

Jaffe even gave Rubino a pass for allegedly obstructing an investigation. A friend of Rubino admitted she lied when she claimed authorship of the ugly comments, but Rubino denied asking her to do so. Rubino’s “clumsy attempt at a cover-up reflects panic, not planning,” the judge wrote.

In firing Rubino last June, hearing officer Randi Lowitt said Facebook and other social media “are becoming embedded in society.” Lowitt chided, “People post without regard to the fact that what they post has a shelf life of forever.”

Jaffe differed. “Even though [Rubino] should have known that her postings could become public,” the judge wrote, it was “reasonable” to expect that only her Facebook adult friends would see them.

Citing Rubino’s “unblemished” 15-year teaching history, Jaffe voided the termination and sent her back to the department for a “lesser penalty.”

Rubino, who made $78,885 a year, won’t go back on the payroll so fast because the department may appeal.

Rubino’s lawyer, Bryan Glass, said, “A simple warning to Ms. Rubino about her mistake would have sufficed, and it would not have been repeated. Perhaps in this time of scarce resources, the substantial time and money on this case could be better allocated by the DOE supporting its teachers in the classroom rather than demonizing and punishing its staff.”

Read more: http://trade.cc/ahpe

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COLONEL’S SECRET CANNIBAL RECIPE: EAR BITTEN OFF IN LINE AT KFC

Ear bitten off in fast food queue (click on link for source)

The attack happened at the KFC on Renfield Street in GlasgowThe attack happened at the KFC on Renfield Street in Glasgow

A man had part of his ear bitten off in a “violent” and “unprovoked” attack by two men in a Glasgow fast food outlet.

Police said the 28-year-old man and his friend were in KFC on Renfield Street when they were confronted by three men and a woman at 23:00 on Friday.

They decided to leave the shop without getting food but were attacked by two of the men as they made their way out.

The victim had the top half of his ear bitten off and was taken to the Royal Infirmary for treatment.

The two men responsible for the attack were last seen in Bath Lane.

One was described as white, about 18, of slim build, with dark hair and wearing a grey tracksuit with yellow writing.

The other was white, about 18 to 20, of slim build and wearing a dark jacket.

He had the name ‘Scott’ tattooed on the right side of his neck.

Det Con Kieron Frost said: “This would appear to a totally unprovoked attack on the 28-year-old man who had only gone into the shop with his friend to purchase something to eat prior to returning home.

“It was a particularly violent attack which resulted in the victim losing the top half of his ear which will now require surgery.”

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Roseanne Barr Files Documents to Become President of the United States of America

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Roseanne Barr
 — who famously butchered the National Anthem — has filed official documents to become the Green Party’s nominee for President of the United States ofAmerica.

Barr — who has been waging a Twitter and Facebook grassroots, digital campaign — has just made it official.  She wants to carry the Green Party banner in the November election.

Barr says she’s sick of Democrats and Republicans, whom she believes are not working in the best interests of the American people.

So what, you ask, is Roseanne pushing?  The answer is simple … pot.  She wants marijuana legalized and sold strictly domestically.

As for the whole Iraq thing … she’ll get back to us.

via TMZ.com

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Cash-Strapped College Students Turning To Food Stamps

(via)

Tuition hikes, combined with the increased cost of general living, have left many college students more strapped for cash than ever before.

As such, more and more are turning to tax-funded food stamp programs to help them afford the essentials.

The program – the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, or SNAP for short – is offered by the United States Department of Agriculture for qualifying people in need.

According to its website, eligibility requirements for the program include gross and net income tests and employment requirements. It is designed primarily to assist families, however students can apply, given the age and work stipulations in place for qualification.

A sum of $200 is awarded to program participants each month, which is to be used toward grocery bills.

The stigma of the cash-strapped college student is nothing new. The use of government aid in amending the situation, however, is a more recent phenomenon.

The educational institutions are reportedly not at all involved in the process on any level, but use of SNAP for help with food bills has become something of a widely accepted practice on campuses.

Ravae Graham, the deputy director of legislative affairs and communications for the state’s Department of Human Services, said that a student’s eligibility depends largely on the amount of time they work outside of the classroom.

“If (an applicant) is working at least 20 hours per week and meets income limits, they can qualify … and college students are eligible,” she told CBS Atlanta. “And there has been a significant increase of use in the program over recent years.”

She added that students who participate in school-funded work study programs may also make the cut.

Food stamp statistics for the state of Georgia provided to CBS Atlanta show that the average size of a household receiving food stamps in 2011 averaged out to 2.40 persons.

The totals for both households and individuals have increased over the past six years, but the latter has seen an especially large spike, rising from just under 950,000 individual users in 2006 to almost 1,740,000 in 2011.

According to The Signal, a student-run newspaper at Georgia State University, a basic meal plan at the school can cost approximately $1,700, which is more than many students can reportedly afford.

“With me being a senior and living on campus for the past four years, I honestly got tired of paying that amount of money per semester just to eat,” student Taylor Smith told the paper. “I did not even know that I was applicable for food stamps until someone told me about the site and to apply to see if I would get it.”

Added Smith, “Since then, I have saved a ton of money.”

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The Super Bowl Prop Bettor’s Guide

via  Cousin Sal’s Gambling Blog on Grantland.com 

 

AP PHOTO/MATT SLOCUM

 

I can’t believe it’s already here. Super Bowl XXCLVICXIILCMCMC. (I did the Roman math — it works out). Either way — I’m prepared. I’ve read up on every degenerate gambler’s wagering option connected to this game. If Congress spent half as much time reading President Obama’s health care plan as I did peering over the Super Bowl proposition menu the country would be a better place.

I know betting on the big game can be a terrifying prospect. Eight months is a long time until your next pigskin wager so you absolutely must get it right. But we’ve been betting on NFL props all year long. We’re good at this — remember? How good? I’m only down 287,000 jermajesties* on the season. You don’t get more expert than that.

Here are a few can’t-lose Super Bowl props and a bunch that aren’t but should be.

The Patriots will convert a 4th down attempt (+120) 
Is this a proptical illusion? Seems too easy. Two weeks ago, Belichick employed an inexplicably ridiculous, conservative offensive game plan against the Ravens and the Patriots still managed a 4th down conversion. And if you think I have a problem wagering on old men in striped outfits measuring chain lengths wait until you see the next bet …100,000 jermajesties

Henry Hynoski over 4.5 receiving/rushing yards (EVEN)
Here it is — my Gary Russell Memorial Super Bowl prop bet of the year. (have a listen to my appearance on this week’s BS Report to get the full Gary Russell history).

I know what you’re thinking — EVERYONE’s going to take this one. It’s too obvious. Oh — that’s not what you’re thinking? Rest easy. I’ve researched this one a ton. Hynoski totaled a whopping 20 yards vs. the 49ers in the NFC title game. He’s surpassed five yards in seven games this year. Expect lots of points and lots of weird plays this Sunday. Sorry Gronkowski/Gostkowski — there’s a new Polish proposition sheriff in town — and his name is Henry Hynoski. Take the over. 150,000 jermajesties

Welker over 78.5 yards receiving (-115) and over 6.5 receptions (-115)
The Giants fantastic front four gives them the luxury of never having to blitz. That means they’ll be able to keep a few linebackers back in coverage to disrupt the Pats mutant beasts lining up at tight end. I think the confusion over the middle will force Brady to throw to his sure-handed go to route in Welker. Not to mention Welker racked up 136 yards against the Giants earlier in the year and that was before he grew the aerodynamically-enhancing mustache. 40,000 jermajesties each

First TD scored: Welker (8/1) and Manningham (12/1)
See Welker reasons above. These Manningham odds are high especially considering the man who will be responsible for covering him strongly resembles a guy who plays wide receiver for the Patriots. 10,000 jermajesties each

Total points 61-65 (7/1), 66-70 (9/1), 71-75 (12/1), 76-80 (15/1), 81+ (6/1)
All of a sudden, I’ve turned into the worst roulette player. Hear me out. Five out of the last 20 Super Bowls fell in this range. In that time half the games played in domes ended up at least in the mid 50s. That means these odds are too high. Worth a shot. 3,000 jermajesties each

Giants total points (+1/2) over Knicks 1st quarter points vs. Nets (-115) 
Simple logic — the Knicks don’t get credit for points when an inbounded pass sticks to a forward’s head — the Giants do. 15,000 jermajesties

Don’t look for these. You won’t find them anywhere …

NE defensive tackle Vince Wilfork’s halftime bowel movement over/under 16.5 pounds?

That’s disgusting. I’m going over. And I don’t want to hear how I’m better than this. I’m not.

137,000/1 odds any valet would be excited to take Matthew Broderick’s Honda CRV for a joyride as they are in this Super Bowl commercial

Anyone else glad the Super Bowl ads are leaked online a week before the game so that we can go to the bathroom during commercial breaks? Anyone? Anyone?

12/1 odds Kelly Clarkson and Madonna will make out at halftime
Not likely.

38/1 Odds Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth will make out at halftime 
Even less likely.

2/1 odds Betty White will make out with and Seal at halftime. 
This is a slam dunk. But not with the recently separated singer — an actual seal. That chick loves animals.

What shade of red will Tom Coughlin’s Rosacea-cursed face be at the end of the game? 
Scarlet and crimson are sucker bets. I’m going with vermillion at 11/1.

65/1 odds Kelly Clarkson gets a last minute Chili’s endorsement deal and during the national anthem replaces the phrase “home of the brave” with “home of the awesome blossom”?
I know. That was a long way to go for a blooming onion joke. Bear with me — this is almost over.

Who will NBC show first in the owner’s box: The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo (Rooney Mara, daughter of Giants VP Chris Mara) or an actual girl with an actual dragon tattoo — Rob Gronkowski’s porn star girlfriend?
If the peacock network has any kind of sense of humor they’ll shoot for the latter.

Even odds that for the ninth year in a row Danica Patrick will get cut-off unzipping a leather jumpsuit in a godaddy.com ad. 
I joke but the truth is to this day she’s still one of the sexiest female dwarf drivers NASCAR has to offer.

Over 35.5 players from both teams are forced to share the same two prostitutes in Indianapolis. 
This is cruel and not at all fair to the players. Like the Brady children having to share the same bathroom as Alice the maid. Barbaric!

1/3 odds that Madonna gets replaced by Kellie Pickler after failing the HGH test. 
Hold on. I have a few of these.

Number of game balls made from Madonna’s skin — over/under 8
Almost there.

Which will be higher: Victor Cruz receiving yards or number of visible veins in Madonna’s arms?
Okay — that’s enough. Wait — one more.

Over/under 2.5 friends of yours that will out themselves at your Super Bowl party by knowing all the lyrics to Madonna’s La Isla Bonita

If by any chance you dreamt of San Pedro last night — please keep it to yourself. Or at least save it for a Glee re-run.

5/2 odds Eli Manning’s wife Abby leaps from her luxury box seat to her death after NBC shows a side by side photo of her and Gisele Bundchen.
Hold on — I’m looking at a picture of Abby now. She’s actually pretty cute. Let’s make it 7/2 odds.

Even odds that NBC shoe horns in Whitney Cummings’ irreverent female take on football.
Hey NBC — you already spared us Fear Factor‘s donkey semen stunt. Please do us all a favor and give us a pass on this one as well.

Which will be higher: television shots of Peyton Manning or television shots of Peyton Manning doing shots?

I know — it’s a thinker.

3/1 odds that at next year’s Media Day I will be asking white players who their favorite black person is much like I did last night on Jimmy Kimmel Live

Sorry, black folks — white people are dumb.

That’s that. Enjoy the game. And regardless of how much real money I’ve cost you this year with my fake advice — let’s really try to stay friends this year.

— Cousin Sal

*(Obligatory weekly explanation: A “jermajesty” represents the fake name given for a dollar amount. It is also the unfortunate name of one of Jermaine Jackson’s sons.)

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NEVADA DEGENERATES FOR RON PAUL!

(via)

A poker player helped rent a billboard, a Mormon spreads the word at root beer socials and prostitutes at a famous brothel turn tricks and donate their customers’ tips — all for Ron Paul.

The 76-year-old, 12-term Texas Republican congressman is banking on a big showing at the Feb. 4 Nevada caucuses to boost his third presidential primary bid. His message of personal liberty, states’ rights and low taxes resonates with voters in the state, where prostitution is legal, gambling is widespread and the foreclosure rate has been the highest in the nation for five years, according to RealtyTrac.

“Go to the Romney campaign and ask ‘How many of your lives have been changed by the philosophy of Mitt Romney?’” Julie Benincasa, 52, of Las Vegas said in an interview as she volunteered in Paul’s Henderson, Nevada, campaign office this week. “People will go, ‘what?’”

“My entire life — just about every spare moment, in one way or another — is promoting Ron Paul’s message of liberty, limited government and sound money,” she said, adding that she sold $1,600 worth of jewelry to donate to the campaign.

Benincasa’s commitment to Paul is matched by a legion of followers who see it as their duty to spread the word, including Arin Hopkins, 46, a dog sitter in a gated community in Henderson who pays for pro-Paul brochures and delivers them door-to-door and Pete Claytor, 49, a Las Vegas electrical union member who converted five of the six Democrats at his job site.

Gambler’s Billboard

Robert Fellner, 27, a professional poker player and blogger, donated $1,000 of the $3,500 cost of putting a billboard up in downtown Las Vegas, raising the rest of the cost on his website. The billboard touts Paul as the only candidate to predict the economic collapse.

Those avid supporters may give Paul an advantage in such caucus states as Nevada and Maine on Feb. 4 and Colorado and Minnesotaon Feb. 7, where casting a vote takes more of a time commitment than showing up at a precinct and casting a ballot.

On Jan. 31, as the Florida results were being counted, Paul flew into Nevada and kicked off a state tour with a rally at a Henderson casino that drew more than a 1,000 — a number far exceeding Newt Gingrich’s 200-person reception in Orlando that evening.

‘Irate, Tireless Minority’

“We will spend our time in the caucus states because if you have an irate, tireless minority you do very well in the caucus states,” said Paul, who finished fourth in Florida’s primary with 7 percent. “If you have an energized group of people that are working on a campaign and actually believe in something, it is going to work in the caucus states.”

In the Jan. 3 Iowa caucuses, Paul placed third with 21 percent of the vote. Romney and former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum had 24.5 percent and 24.6 percent, respectively, in the contest, while Gingrich had 13 percent.

In Nevada, Paul’s staffers have been on the ground for more than six months, Carl Bunce, the state campaign chairman, said at the Jan. 31 rally. They have been educating voters both on the candidate and on the caucus process, holding “scores” of training events all over the state, said James Barcia, deputy national press secretary.

Paul is the only candidate with a presence on college campuses here, said David Damore, associate professor of political science atUniversity of Nevada, Las Vegas. The only campaign with a stronger ground operation in the state is Romney’s, Damore and other observers said.

Tea Party Outsourcing

“The Paul folks are well-organized, the Romney folks are well-organized and Gingrich is outsourcing to the Tea Party,” Damore said.

In 2008, Romney won the Nevada caucuses with 51 percent support compared to Paul’s 14 percent. In the four years since then, both candidates have maintained their support bases in the state. Romney has spent more money. As of Jan. 31, he had bought almost twice as much in broadcast television commercials in the state than Paul, according New York-based Kantar Media’s CMAG, a company that tracks advertising. The other Republican contenders hadn’t spent anything on commercials.

Nevada Lieutenant Governor Brian Krolicki, co-chairman of the Romney campaign in the state, said he’s confident his candidate will win, although he wouldn’t rule out Paul’s campaign machine.

“A caucus can always be full of surprises,” he said in a media call on Jan. 31.

Appealing to Mormons

One way Paul is targeting Romney is by going after his rival’s base: members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- Day Saints, who four years ago comprised about 25 percent of Nevada’s Republican caucus-goers. A campaign subgroup called Latter Day Saints for Ron Paul is seeking to convince Mormons that the congressman — and not LDS member Romney — best represents their views about the U.S. Constitution.

“Although the country might be ready for a Mormon president, we provide them with the notion that, in terms of constitutionality, that we have the better candidate,” Barcia said in a Jan. 30 interview at the Henderson campaign office.

David IsBell, 29, from Las Vegas, said he saw a sign on an overpass in Salt Lake City in 2007 that said “Google Ron Paul.” He did. IsBell had been a Mormon missionary in Eastern Europe when the U.S. invaded Iraq. The move turned him away from President George W. Bush and other Republicans. Paul’s opposition to the war got his attention.

“He was the first politician who gave me goose bumps when he talked,” IsBell said in a telephone interview. “The way Ron Paul speaks is parallel to the way our prophet Ezra Taft Benson spoke about our faith,” he said referring to the former president of the Mormon church, who served from 1985 to 1994.

Root Beer Floats

IsBell said he spreads that message at root beer float socials, game nights and other events wearing a Ron Paul t- shirt. He shares quotes from Benson, and then Paul.

“Mormons are reliable voters — they turn out,” said Robert Uithoven, a Republican consultant with j3 Strategies in Reno. Still, Uithoven, who has ties to Las Vegas Sands Corp. (LVS)chairman and Gingrich supporter Sheldon Adelson, puts most Mormons in Romney’s camp. While Nevada’s libertarian streak is good for Paul, those same Mormon voters were targeted by his campaign in 2008, Uithoven said.

“He has a base of support that tends not to grow very much,” Uithoven said.

Paul’s strategy isn’t limited to Mormons. He has rolled out special coalitions of gun owners, home-schoolers, veterans, Hispanics and hospitality workers, too.

The most unlikely coalition of supporters, though, is the one the candidate didn’t recruit.

Moonlite BunnyRanch

At the Moonlite BunnyRanch, a legal brothel near Carson City featured in HBO’s “Cathouse” series, the most scantily- clad caucus of all was held two weeks ago.

Dennis Hof, 65, the proprietor and self-described “pimpmaster general” of the BunnyRanch and five other Nevada brothels, said he polled all 500 women to see who they supported for the presidency. Last time, they cast their support behind Barack Obama. This cycle their opposition to the roundups of wild horses on federal land near the brothel moved them to Paul.

He said they like Gingrich — they “don’t have a problem with him being a womanizer” — but they think Romney is too square. Paul’s support for states’ rights won them over, he said.

At the BunnyRanch, customers who say they are “Pimpin’ for Paul” get extra attention, Hof said, and some of the women ask clients for Paul donations. Many, like Hustler centerfold Cami Parker, 25, also donate tips.

“I really appreciate the fact that Ron Paul respects states’ rights and individual rights,” Parker said in a telephone interview. “It seems like he really understands our rights to do what we want.”

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