Year End Robot Walk

There will be no surprises. You will not get a break down in the indices before the New Year. Managers will defend their positions with great vigor, using the retirement money of firemen and garbagemen to fund said activities.

Do not allow your political views blind you from the fact that robots control our markets. These robots, whether mechanical or human, are interested in fucking up the bears something awful. While you idiots try to eat healthy, via slobbering down chocolate covered vegetables, there are people out there (as we speak!) swallowing cow meat by the fucking pound. What that means, with regards to investing?

Absolutely nothing.

However, I will tell you, “The Fly” is not interested in working for the remainder of 2009. I just got back from the fucking movies. I saw that flick “Avatar.” What a blast.

Back to business.

I see weakness is permeating the tape, with stocks slowly sliding throughout the day. But, do not be tricked into selling short or selling out of winning positions, before year end. Why book the taxable gain?

Unless you are able to offset the tax gain, you are better off selling in the new year.

As for me:

I am busy with year end shit. At these levels, I like SandRidge Energy Inc. [[SD]] , [[CBD]] and [[YONG]] for a bounce.

Approximately 10 months ago, I challenged all iBC bloggers to develop a premium service for our readers, to compliment The PPT. Obviously, as you could imagine, this was a very difficult task, mainly because “The Fly” sets his standards very high.

Using God’s gifts and a little skill, over the past 10 months, Woodshedder has developed an extraordinary trading system, using dips to position into stocks, like Einstein used atoms to destroy Nagasaki. I applaud him for that, indeud.

The result: Woodshedder, in conjunction with the brain-trust at iBC, is proud to launch “The Power Dip System.”

If you are interested in a service that will cherry pick stocks, using historical backtesting, The Power Dip System (PDS) is for you.

Sign up now for a free trial (no billing info required — all you need is a valid email address.) (DO IT NOW) and enjoy yet another quality product, courtesy of iBC.

For the holiday’s, “The Fly,” (better know as “Le Fly” in Paris) has decided to greet his readers with kindness, while displaying sincere gratitude for their loyalty to the site, whether it be in the form of “internet barnacle” or distinguished gentleman of The PPT. As you well know, “The Fly” has a reputation for saying outlandish things and displaying outright disrespect towards all forms of authority, when in fact he harbors deep compassion for all forms of life, even firemen.

One thing, however, is entirely accurate, with reference to his daily diatribes declared (rather emphatically) here on iBankCoin. With regards to his so called wins, often a topic that is talked about amongst his enemies (rightfully so), they are all indeed real. It is something to behold. It truly and certainly is rare for one man, without the assistance of “paid for” information, to enjoy such a splendid track record. More specifically, it is even more scarce to have the actions of a financial genius (if I may go that far) shared with all to read— for free— on the internet. What a treat for all!

To be fair to the critics, it is almost unbelievable that one man can win so many times, yet have the time to write a blog on the internet. To the classic skeptic, the very concept of “The Fly” is distasteful, especially since all of his victories are discussed in the most vile manner—possessing zero behavioral traits of a professional money manager and most certainly not of a gentleman. Humility is rarely displayed; and when it is, unfortunately, it is accompanied with sharp sarcasm and solemn oaths to exact revenge on all “guilty parties.” As of late, “all guilty parties” consist of a small group of people who sell short U.S. equities, unfortunately—yet again.

Please pardon me for repeating an earlier point: what a treat!

On occasion, “The Fly” is plagued with minor setbacks, which are all dispatched away from his person in the most expeditious manner. Subsequently, as a result of his battles, “the internet proletariat,” as he likes to call it, is allocated with enough written material to assimilate his (The Fly) actions into their own decision making processes. This, as you could easily understand, is a terrific boon for all readers of iBankCoin, which must have resulted in millions of dollars in unspoken profits.

With these gains, citizens of the United States have employed more workers, invested more dollars in the sciences and the arts. As a result of “The Fly,” and his generous gifts of cognitive thinking, the world is a better place.

Looking into the future, I can only imagine iBankCoin becoming the predominant financial website for all serious investors/ “internet slopsuckers.” It is my belief, sometimes to a fault, that iBankCoin was created to offset internet group think and assist young commoners with monthly expenditures, via the gift of knowledge.

What a treat (many apologies for the repetition of this expression.)!

For the record, I think gold has bottomed, for now. And, I believe, emphatically, my chances of making “fuck you Santa Claus, I have my own sled” type of money in Green Mountain Coffee Roasters Inc. [[GMCR]] has increased exponentially, based upon retail channel checks that indicate “robustness.”

All in all, I am quite content with my current roster of holdings. Next week will be tax loss selling time, even for me. There is no reason to end the year with gains, without offsetting some by liquidating losers. ‘Tis the time to clean slate and prepare for the new year.

Before year end, all iBC bloggers will issue their 2010 predictions, posted on a jointly made pdf document.

On a closing note, housing starts are going to begin ramping soon. It might be a good idea to get long some homies, especially after the tax loss selling is complete. With my money, I’ve been buying shares of Lennar Corporation [[LEN]] with the hopes that you burlap blazer wearing motherfuckers keep selling it short. As you know, burlap makes for great tinder.

Be well.

You little devils fell right into the trap.

Enjoy the luxuries of the vice, for the remainder of the day.

Developing…

I want to squeeze some of you short sellers for pagan X-mas. Please, I insist that you believe all of the nonsense disseminated by men who have NO FUCKING IDEA what they are doing in the market, by way of short selling equities, right here. The internet is a fascinating place, if you are into low-end think tanks that only focus on negativity. Tell me, how many of these so called financial bloggers have been bullish throughout 2009?

Answer: Only iBankCoin.

I will have you know, there are strict standards upheld here on iBankCoin. Gone are the days when strange men, dressed as male hookers, grabbed an opportunity to blog here. During 2010, I will have this blog audited for performance standards. Granted, none of this information will be disseminated to you, the internet moron. Instead, it will be for my eyes only, in order to properly monitor the advice given on the site. Mediocrity will not be tolerated.

It’s simply not good enough to tell people what you are doing. If you want to write for this site, bring your fucking A game or go home.

I like oil/gas stocks here, specifically my top squeeze play ATPG , which has been #1 rated on The PPT all week long.

Also, at these levels, I like PKX , SHLD , SD, GMCR, FLS and GROW. If gold rebounds, GROW will rip the tits off of those who sold it short.

iBankCoin is launching its second premium service this Sunday, just in time for pagan X-mas. Like The PPT, The Power Dip System relies on the laws of mathematics to cherry pick stock ideas.

Over the next several days, we will update you with details about the system, with regards to pricing and how cool it will make you look when hanging out at your local Starbucks while sucking down some bullshit coffee— surfing the PDS “open picks” page.

Here are today’s picks, courtesy of Mr. Woodshedder aka HOLLY-Wood.

RC is hosting the “3rd annual madstocks contests” (whatever the fuck that means). Go make your predictions and win a really crappy gift in 2011, as a result.

The market shall NEVER breach today’s lows, for the remainder of 2009. From here, we shall shoot up and stomp mud holes in the bears, while eating caviar and slapping our underlings with live lobsters. We shall all be rich and walk around with canes and top hats, offering polite greetings, like: “Good day to you Sir,” while mumbling “fuckface motherfucker” very subtly to our neighbors passing by. Not to mention, we shall throw apples, in secret, at firetrucks who park in front of grocery stores.

The shopping mall will become a place where we go to unwind, via purchasing wasteful bullshit at Fendi and Gucci, mainly out of sheer love for overpriced fashion.

Ladies and Gents, prepare for BROKEN ROBOTS.

Having my largest position, Green Mountain Coffee Roasters Inc. [[GMCR]] , up on a day while gold is getting eviscerated is making me blush. People are approaching me, congratulating me for defeating Professor Gint; but to be honest, it isn’t necessary. Please, I insist, no autographs. “The Fly” is as humble in defeat, as he is in victory.

My predictions of higher natty, lower gold and higher Green Mountain Coffee Roasters Inc. [[GMCR]] was pure luck. I was simply taking shots in the dark, while playing with my molasses bottles.

As an aside, I know what you dipshit dollar lovers are thinking. You don’t like the dollar. No, you are far more nefarious than that. You hate America and want to see it destroyed, so that your miserable existence can be justified. After all, misery loves company.

The good news: some stocks are becoming attractive again, like POSCO (ADR) [[PKX]] , Mechel OAO (ADR) [[MTL]] and Flowserve Corporation [[FLS]] . On this dip, I will use The PPT to time new buys, when the score hits the mid 2.20’s. If you are wondering where the score is now, fuck off and chalk up enough dough for a subscription.

In short, “The Fly” is winning, even when down for the day, which should be no surprise to any of you. I look forward to defeating future enemies or friends in other inane pointless challenges, all here on the fucking internet.