iBC Presents: Brimstone, Young Man, Brimstone!

I hope to receive numerous Oscar nominations for this short film. While watching, be sure to pretend you are French, via wearing silly hats and drinking copious amounts of Bordeaux with cheese niblets.

Bravo!

As you know, the market has blasted through our overbought readings, in recent weeks. Lending credence to the old saying “nothing is full proof.”  Being that we just registered another 3.00+ score on Wednesday, my question to you is: are you feeling lucky, punk?

NOTE: Remember to tune in tomorrow, at 8:00pm, for a new Fly episode, titled:  Brimstone, Young Man, Brimstone!

I just got done reading the SEC document, pertaining to its lawsuit versus Goldman Sachs, and I’ve been laughing– rather hysterically–ever since. I’m not going to name names, because that’s not what I do. But, some of you finance bloggers out there just don’t get it.

Yeah, “Fabulous” Fabrice Tourre is a scumbag of monumental proportions; but that’s the business. Eighty five percent (give or take) of all the brokers, investment bankers and big deal makers out there are embedded in deeply rooted, flawed, scum bag personality traits, that can only be corrected via death. Look, I don’t see what the big deal is about John Paulson helping to creating the product, just because he intended to buy insurance against it. Who the fuck was he, prior to 2008? Sure, he was successful, just like a multitude of other hedge fund managers. But, it’s not like the guy was fucking Merlin, or some sort of space alien magician with crystal balls coming out of his ass. If the game was prolonged a little longer, Paulson would have looked like a fucking first rate jackass, getting poleaxed on a bunch of CDO’s. It just so happened that he was right, with the idea and timing. Do you know how many hedge fund managers get wiped out, betting one way, because their timing was off by a few months?

And, it’s not like Goldman or ACA was marketing the fucking products to 85 year grandmothers. They were selling these products to sophisticated investors, who know how to read a fucking balance sheet. It should not matter, not one fucking bit, that Paulson was intending to take a short position. Who gives a fuck?

When I go out and buy Fuel Systems Solutions, Inc. [[FSYS]] , I do so knowing that there are 1,000 guys out there, just like Paulson, that are betting against me. That’s Wall Street, gentlemen. That’s risk.

As far as I am concerned, the SEC should sanction the Fabulous guy, ding Goldman a few mill for not properly supervising him, and the rest of the ordeal should be hashed out between the banks. Let ACA and the other institutions file lawsuits against Goldman. Doorknobs to donuts, any judge in his right mind would say “you are a sophisticated investor and are supposed to understand the inherent risks associated with the products you buy on behalf of your shareholders/customers” aka fuck off.

Let me get this straight: the government created an environment, through loose monetary policy and lax regulations, that led to the whole CDO/credit crisis debacle. Then, when the shit hit the fan, they bailed out the banks, including Goldman, via TARP and funneling money to them via American International Group, Inc. [[AIG]] . Now, after the market is up and Tea Party’s are running rampant throughout America they want to sue Goldman?

Pardon me for being skeptical; but the government is full of shit and Goldman will end up getting away with nothing more than a little slap on the wrist. If this happened one year ago it might have broke the old bank. But, after such a vigorous market recovery, the Godly fuckers at Goldman can just write a check for $5bill and tell the Obamanites to “fuck off” and enjoy the robot led recovery.

I had a good day, with [[TLT]] , [[VXX]] and [[SRS]] charging higher. My longs did “alright” with minor pullbacks in Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] and POSCO (ADR) [[PKX]] .

At the end of the day, this market is still in bull mode, until we get a string of triple point decline days. Although I believe the market is way overextended, I have been wrong about calling the top before, so there is no reason to believe I will be right now. Typically, I am pretty good at calling inflection points. However, truth be on the table spinning, I have been dumbfounded by the relentless and incessant “bullshittery.”

NOTE: I believe Mr. Bones, iBC’s new blogger, will post this weekend. And, be sure to tune in on Sunday, at 8:00pm, for my little cartoon show: “The Fly” Meets Mr. Devil Dog.

My game plan, which was concocted inside of the iBC Eastern Asian headquarters in a small western Mongolian province, has been in place and prepared for more than 3 weeks. To some of you, 3 weeks seems like an eternity, thanks to the undersized brain inside of your monkey skulls. However, for a professional, such as myself, 3 weeks is like driving a camel through a desert without the luxuries of water. I give you that, it has been fucking torture, but entirely necessary.

My brains are not addled with ADHD like yours and I do not suffer from severe personality disorder. All I ask for, from this humble market, is for it to take a few gravity hammers to the head, so that I may buy your margin liquidation.

Will I buy this dip?

Absolutely not.

If the market rebounds on Monday, will I buy then?

Yes.

I am not betting on the apocalypse, nor am I betting on a fucking retard victory lap for the bulls. Today’s move “can” be the beginning of something material or simply another opportunity to buy in lower. The only way to find out is to wait and see.

In the meantime, I will wait it out, as I have been for awhile now, with more than 70% of my assets “defensive” or in cash.

The end of the world is coming and you are worried about the stock exchange? While earthquakes hit and ancient volcanoes erupt, you go figure out a way to buy some fucking Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] on the dip. As you do that, HORATIO CLAWHAMMER aka “The Fly” will be building space rockets and shit, for expeditious and convenient evacuation from this cesspool.

As an aside, the flavour [sic] of today’s coffee is BLACK SMOKE. I suggest you take a few sips, while enduring uppercuts to the scrotum, 100% long this market at the 100% tippy-fucking-top. Hell, just yesterday Cramer was on the teevee talking “Dow 12,000,” yet here we are “submarining” into lunch.

My longs are getting hit today. But, overall, with 30% of my assets in [[TLT]] , 10% in [[VXX]] and a little baby position in [[SRS]] , I am doing far better than you, good sir. Oh, did I mention that I had another 30% in cash?

Enjoy the scenery.

Don’t worry ingrates. This PPT post will be quickly dispatched by tomorrow. I am unable, for whatever reason, to embed video inside of The PPT.

I’ve purchased a real jungle type gorilla (not the zoo type variety), and will set him loose on the NYSE trading pits, with explicit sell orders on my behalf. Failure to recognize my “Trading Gorilla” will result in the immediate, and likely extremely punitive, lawsuit versus the cowards and species discriminators over at the exchange aka “the old boys club.” Let it be called the “old boys club,” plus a few “jungle variety gorillas.”

Krull, regarding the markets: This is too fucking funny. My favorite part is at the end. You will know what I mean, when you see it.

LE UPDÁTE!

Ack, ack, ack. Ack ack aaaaaack 40 ack!

Come one, come all.

Come and git your rootin’ tootin’ 40 Dow points, as part as the stimuli program brought hither by our Leader and Commander, Mr. Blankfein.

Do not let your brain get in the way of a little, good ol’ fashioned money. Hell, I’m over here sick as a pig from eating, well, pig. And still, I gathered up enough of my wits to make me some lotto money in this here Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] . Let this be a reminder to any of you Yankee types out there, readying to lawyer up against our great leader: GET YOUR FUCKING 40 FIRST, you dumb son of a bitch!!! It’s free money out here, folks. All you have to do is git yourself a nice sized shovel. Make yourself a trench. Then go on the computers and click a few of them silly buttons, THEN BAM: money manufactured to put in the trench!

God I love America.

UPDATE: I bought 2,500 Fuel Systems Solutions, Inc. [[FSYS]] @32.33

UPDATE II: Bought another 2,000 [[FSYS]] @ $32.85

UPDATE III: I bought 10,000 [[FTK]] @ $1.74.