Dropping With Honour

At least the market isn’t dropping like it was being raped, while its hair was aflame. Much to my chagrin, the market is declining like a gentleman, if such a thing exists. I envision some guy, holding the market levers, slowly lowering this fucker over a fine Chardonnay.

Naturally, the shareholders of some of my positions would beg to differ, from such a deranged, yet poignant argument. I, on the other hand, do not believe this decline is “healthy,” like idiots espouse on television boxes. However, I do believe we are in the midst of a process. The market is cleansing itself of weak links, while “gorilla stomping” those who have faith in equities.

It’s quite the conundrum.

Once again, the flight to quality into t-bills is running wild, even after LIBOR and TED spreads have eased. This makes no sense.

The new focus is the economy. Gosh darnit, just when you thought the market was set to trade up, the fucking economy gets in the way.

Here’s the thing:

The economy is going to be weak, for at least another 5-9 months. But, as many of you stock market lovers know, usually, the market bottoms out 6 months prior to an economic recovery. And, if I may be so bold, the markets always outperform during the months of Nov-December.

My plans, as always, is to get long into Thanksgiving, short into Christmas. I am not entirely sure where this market will stabilize. Hence, I have a 27% cash position. But, it will be soon and the buying opportunities will be grand, almost gentleman-like.

The fucking horror of it all is so frightening it’s actually funny, as a point in fact.

UBS this month advised bankers to travel economy class for flights of up to five hours, two officials at the biggest Swiss bank said, asking not to be identified because it’s an internal policy. Merrill employees have been asked to travel economy for flights of as much as three hours since mid-September, two executives at the firm said.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkGqSjH8kIo 450 300]

What a monstrous close, after the idiots on the NYSE gave us false hope with that mid-day rally. There is no way to sugar coat it. However, just know, it’s only one day. After all, we have “Skinny Steve” going for us, with his soon to be announced Godly earnings report at Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] .

I should have sold when the market bounced this afternoon, but I didn’t. No point in crying or shotting myself in the face with a howitzer over it. I can only figure out ways to make money tomorrow, not 2 hours ago.

Assholes.

On the bright side, all of today’s buys were executed near the lows of the day. So, if Mother Market is kind to Plutonium Petey, he’ll be blowing out of these commodity fuckers, with egregious gains, by the end of the week.

There are some bright spots in the market, like General Electric Company [[GE]] and Pfizer Inc. [[PFE]] . But who gives a fuck about them.

Right now, it’s all about the state of Steve Jobs and how many soy burgers that fucker has been eating, over the last quarter. God willing, Steve will appear to be quite the plumper, helping stocks rip off the fucking whigs of asshole short sellers, first thing tomorrow morning.

Poof. Your bullshit bear market rally is over.

-Merlin

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6npuEdett-E 450 300]

Let this be a lesson to you fuckers.

I have been buying 250 share lots of National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , like a hypnotized inflation hawk. While it’s true, inflation is virtually non existent, commodity stocks are still cheap. These fuckers will bounce all around, before dying—just like the dot coms, circa 2001.

My position in Citigroup Inc. [[C]] is sucking wind, but that’s okay. I am long from the 13’s and view it as a long term hold, sort of a proxy for the distressed banking system.

With reference to my top 10 positions, some of those positions are not very big, considering my cash position is around 28%. The only meaningful positions are The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and [[UYG]] .

With regards to Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] :

Investors are thinking AAPL will RIMM itself to death tonight. However, I believe those people are idiots and do not realize the tenacity and nazi-like management skills of “Skinny Steve.” I’m holding my AAPL through earnings.

All in all, today’s pullback is healthy, providing the losses remain under 3%. I’m not a fucking perma-bull. I’m more like a temporary bull, with a keen interest in kicking old bearshitters down idle elevator shafts, while guzzling down a few liters of Monster Energy soda.

Top picks: National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , [[UYG]]

UPDATE: I bought 5,000 Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] @ $25.32, 2,000 [[NOV]] @ $30.15 and 2,000 [[MOS]] @ $37.20

My plan was to do nothing today, thinking the market would be a snoozer. I was going to buy tomorrows dip, then sell on Friday. However, with the market swan diving here, unable to string together 2 consecutive green S&P days since late September, I may begin to nibble.

The problem with buying here is the volatility. The market can very easily dive another 300 points, before rallying. So, with stocks like National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] and Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] , patience is key.

Ideally, I would love to nail the higher low on these stocks with a new flurry of Godly buys. However, that is not likely. Instead, I will leg into these stocks, buying 500 shares at a clip, until I am fat and content.

For some reason, people are flocking into treasuries again, sending yields lower. It’s the flight to quality trade taking its grip on Wall Streets neck. LIBOR has come down, which is terrific. But, there is still a lot of scared money out there, evidenced by the ridiculous yields in treasuries.

In closing, I have not done anything today. Should things continue to deteriorate, I may place some buy orders, towards the end of the session. In my opinion, this market should be bought on dips, not sold.

Wow, that old fucker Kirk Kerkorian got wiped the fuck out this year, losing more than 12 billion dollars in the stock market casino via Ford Motor Company [[F]] and MGM MIRAGE [[MGM]] . How egregious is that? The man is 91 years old and he is still playing the market—totally nonsensical.

The numbers out of Freeport-McMoRan Copper & Gold Inc. [[FCX]] sucked. Therefore, all of the copper players are trading off. The reality of lower copper prices is finally starting to hit home.

Post yesterday’s melt up, today is just one big let down. The air is slowly coming out of the market, as jerk offs with series 7 licenses take profits and/or begin to place short positions. On the other hand, at least the volatility has subsided, which is great for my fucking heart and brain.

Earnings season is upon us and it will not be pretty. However, with my money, I am pretty sure there is some milk left in this cow to drain. So, on dips, I will add to my National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] and [[UYG]] positions.

But, just know, I can turn on a fucking dime. Do not be surprised to see me buying [[FXP]] or [[SRS]] , for outrageous laughs and somber cries.

In short, go eat a sandwich.

1. Cash

2. National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.64: Buy)

3. [[UYG]] (PPT Technical Score: 1.65: Strong Sell)

4. The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.69: Buy)

5. [[TBT]] (PPT Technical Score: 1.70: Strong Sell)

6. Citigroup Inc. [[C]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 1.70: Strong Sell)

7. General Electric Company [[GE]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 2.24: Sell)

8. [[M]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.19: Buy)

9. Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.36: Buy)

10. The Procter & Gamble Company [[PG]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.51: Buy)

NOTE: PPT Hybrid Score is the combination of PPT Technical and Fundamental ranks. A score of 1-2 equals Strong Sell, 2-3 equals Sell, 3-4 equals Buy and 4-5 equals Strong Buy.