Gentlemen, Prepare for Nuclear Armageddon; Trump Becomes First President to Menace Another World Leader with Nuclear War on Twitter

Our shit-poster in chief, a man who is actively seeking to destroy FAKE NEWS from publishing the great many lies he likes to tell, has just upped the ante on social media — becoming the first leader of a country to menace another with nuclear war via Twitter.

Where does this end? At the ass end of a bomb shelter, apparently.

North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un just stated that the “Nuclear Button is on his desk at all times.” Will someone from his depleted and food starved regime please inform him that I too have a Nuclear Button, but it is a much bigger & more powerful one than his, and my Button works!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 3, 2018

Thank heavens Hillary didn’t get elected, otherwise we might be barreling towards some sort of inane nuclear showdown with a shit tier country who has nothing at all to do with America’s national interests.

In lighter news, the President will also be handing out “DISHONEST and CORRUPT MEDIA AWARDS” this year for fake news manufacturers. How wonderful and gracious of him to do so.

I will be announcing THE MOST DISHONEST & CORRUPT MEDIA AWARDS OF THE YEAR on Monday at 5:00 o’clock. Subjects will cover Dishonesty & Bad Reporting in various categories from the Fake News Media. Stay tuned!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 3, 2018

What the fuck is going on here?

Nasdaq futures are +3.

Crypto currencies are through the god damned roof, propelling the collective market cap to over $670 billion. All of you ham and eggers waiting for Bitcoin to implode will need to wait a little bit longer. Meanwhile, stocks jumped higher by 100 Dow and 100 Nasdaqs — all but eviscerating shorts and subjugating them to fag-boxes, by which they will float in space indefinitely.

My Quant holdings rose by more than 1.4% and gold was the standout — making my JNUG an extreme winner today. With crude above $60, you should all get long oil stocks now, else miss out on what could become the single best trade of the year — piece of shit oil stocks.

I am long SN and BBG.

Once again, the standouts were crypto-proxies, led by names like BURG, GROW, TEUM, NETE, LTEA and SIEB. I was going to buy SIEB earlier today, but opted for the hamburger joint instead. Truth be told, BURG has a lot of upside left in here. You’ll find that out soon enough. Inside Exodus, we’re trading these fuckers all day. I’ve corralled them in one space and watch over them like my children.

I booked one trade today, a 20% winner in XNET, and have an interest in buying more BURG tomorrow morning. We live in the very best of times — might as well profit from it with extreme recklessness.

A lot of people ask me how best to use Exodus. I will show you now.

Case in point, $IBB flagged oversold on Friday. Upon seeing this, as a member, you’d take a look at the track record of our AI calling oversold signals for IBB.

Seemingly flawless.

Biotech is hot today.

IBB broke sharply higher.

Exodus wins again.

I just sold out of XNET. I had purchased the stock about a week ago in the $13s and I decided to take the quick 20% gain. With cryptos running hard, now with a combined market cap of ~$650 billion, I do not fear an upending in the market. However, I did just buy a hammed burger crypto play and I also still own GSUM and a little NXTDW.

With the proceeds, I bought SN — because it’s a heavily shorted and hated oil stock. And, I think the Iranian situation is about to worsen, which should buoy the price of crude.

Arab demonstrators burn the Islamist regime in #Iran’s flag in #Ahwaz. #IranianProtests #Iranprotests pic.twitter.com/l7hLVKtzAJ

— PDKI (@PDKIenglish) January 1, 2018

Call me crazy, but everyone is laughing at this small little hammed burger joint trying to become a blockchain play. Truth is, they have a greater chance of receiving new business now, luring normies into their locales for burgers and cryptos, than any Madison Avenue high end advertising campaign ever made.

To offer patrons crypto currencies to burger eating cro magnon Americans is absolutely fucking genius.

Naturally, buying a low float stock like this is reckless and not for the faint of heart. But it’s worth an early in the year gamble for me, especially with my Quant portfolio set for the month and my other positions all up sharply, chiefly JNUG and XNET.

Also, I get the sense the Iranian situation will worsen, which is why I am confidently long BBG.

Notice how most of the pot companies are domiciled in Canada, just like the countless other scams that are thrusted upon us by our loyalist cousins to the north. The entire Canada is one giant wasteland of perfidious swindlers and mountebanks, wholly interested in fraudulent schemes. Nevertheless, with California legalizing pot for recreational purposes, I suppose we should start looking at investment opportunities.

The go-to play here is via the only pot ETF: MJX.

Also, STZ took a 10% stake in Canopy Growth and there’s a little property play for weed: IIPR.

Check it out.

Innovative Industrial Properties, Inc. is focused on the acquisition, ownership and management of specialized industrial properties leased to state-licensed operators for their regulated medical-use cannabis facilities. The Company intends to acquire its properties through sale-leaseback transactions and third-party purchases. It is focused on leasing its properties on a triple-net lease basis, where the tenant is responsible for all aspects of and costs related to the property and its operation during the lease term, including maintenance, taxes and insurance. The Company intends to conduct business in an umbrella partnership real estate investment trust (UPREIT), structure through its operating partnership. The Company’s real estate investments will consist of primarily properties suitable for cultivation and production of medical-use cannabis.

Other pot plays include Scott’s Miracle Grow, SMG, GWPH and NEPT. But as this market develops and share prices rise, rest assured, we’ll see a lot more of them cropping up.

Fucking stoners. I belong in the 18th century.

Just when you thought having iced tea on the Blockchain was fucking absurd, this morning I bring you burgers.

There’s hardly any shares in the float and it’s only up a mere 70%. Clearly, there are a lot of sleep heads out there, unaware of the news — hammed burgers are now on the fucking blockchain. I repeat, hammed burgers are now on the fucking blockchain.

Mobivity Holdings Corp. (MFON), makers of the award-winning platform for intelligent and personalized marketing in the real world, and Chanticleer Holdings Inc. (BURG), the owners and operators of several fast casual restaurant brands, today announced plans to use MobivityMind, a blockchain-architected platform for commerce and customer communication across brands, to power their groundbreaking cryptocurrency customer loyalty and rewards program. Chanticleer Holding’s brands, including BGR (Burgers Grilled Right), Little Big Burger, and American Burger Co., will leverage the MobivityMind platform to reward customers with a currency that can be leveraged across all Chanticleer Holding brands – and beyond. “Eating a burger is now a way to mine for cryptocoins! Every meal enjoyed at any Chanticleer Holdings brand will accrue currency for the consumer that can be used for future meals or traded with other consumers. It transforms traditional consumer rewards into something that the consumer can control,” said Dennis Becker, CEO of Mobivity, and visionary behind the concept.

“We wanted to expand our existing loyalty program with something that really changes the way our customers can leverage their rewards; Mobivity Merit is real cryptocurrency, leveraging the same infrastructure and principles of Bitcoin, Ethereum, Ripple, Litecoin, and more, and will enable our customers to make use of their rewards in entirely new ways,” said Michael D. Pruitt, Chairman, President and CEO of Chanticleer Holdings. “Use your Merit mined by eating at Little Big Burger to get a buffalo chicken sandwich at American Burger Co., or trade them with your vegan friend so he can get a veggie burger at BGR. And that’s just the beginning,” he continued. Mobivity’s Merit allows brands to create one-time use rewards which can be redeemed across brands and traded with virtually no fraud concern by leveraging the decentralized blockchain-based cryptocurrency paradigm. “We’re excited to see how consumers respond to the idea of getting real, transferrable, secure value in exchange for their loyalty to our brands,” added Pruitt.

That’s right fuckers. Get in there and eat some burgers, while earning loyalty points in the form of crypto currencies. This is good for a solid 1,000% gain.

I think so. With the tax cuts coming in and the Trump administration spending like drunken fools, it’s only a matter of time before the dollar sinks to new lows.

The play here, obviously, is long GLD. I am long both GLD and JNUG at the open of trade for 2018, not because I had a hunch that the dollar was gonna get smoked, but because I’m a better trader than you.

Any questions?

Welcome to 2018, fucked face.

Good morning.

CNN sent out one of their reporters to Colorado to ‘investigate’ legal procreation of marijuana and then broadcasted the degeneracy live for America to behold. Do not worry lads, marijuana is medicinal and doesn’t have any downside, such as cancer or losing vast amounts of brain cells. Feel free to smoke as much as you want, operate machinery, and have a grande time.

Here’s CNN at a puff and pass party.

And here’s CNN on a weed party bus, exploring the virtues of having a bong attached to a gas mask.

I can’t wait until heroin is legalized and CNN shows young America how to properly mainline opiates.

If the Iranian protests get violent, look for the price of oil to fucking surge. Markets aren’t pricing in this bullshit yet; but rest assured, any Iranian revolution would be inexplicably wonderful for oilFAGS trading in and out of exploration names. Being the worst sector to own next to retail for 2017, there could be appreciable upside to be had in the oils.

Nasdaq futures are +17. Any movement against the Iranian government will be viewed as a net positive for markets — globalists for the win.

On my end of things, I posted the Quant portfolio to be purchased tomorrow in Exodus. That will be a pastiche of stocks held for a duration of 1 month. Also, I updated the GARP portfolio, which is a semi-annually managed group of stocks. I employed a different method for this portfolio and feel it will be my best one yet.

Stocks are poised to trade higher — continuing the elasticity we enjoyed throughout 2017. Frankly speaking, I don’t think we’ll ever have a down month again. Ever.