Fly Buys: ALJ, EXK

I bought more ALJ and started a new position in EXK.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, your only son will become a Met fan. And, you may lose money.

Well, well, well, look what we have here, a regular melt up of sorts. You little raccoon fuckers will feel the sharp end of my blade today, especially those who are short silver. I take personal offense to anyone who is shorting silver, following a 1 week 30% decline. If you are such a person, mind you, your balls are toast (no idea what that really means).

The job numbers were better than expected, mainly because THE ECONOMY IS ON FUCKING FIRE. Fuck you very much.

As a result, I am expecting a 125-200 point rally today, lifting everything, AND MORE. There is no need for me to give you stock picks. If you are a PPT subscriber, go check out the recent OVERSOLD list and have at it. As you know, it is a sublime harmony of mathematical precision (SHOMP).

Into the open, “The Fly” will be hedonistically eating beluga caviar over ghetto fabulous ritz crackers, whilst sipping on some Ace champagne (gold bottle).

This is being auctioned at Sotheby’s next week Friday.

Starting bid: $35,000

Name: SILVERFUCKED

Artist: Dr. Le Fly

NOTE: iBC is now accepting direct advertisers. Do not be scared off by prices, as we are a premium destination. I will accommodate all, one way or another.

Fuck this shit. I dodge nuclear detonation this morning with a WNR reversal, only to fall victim of a heinous margin liquidation fueled run on silver. I am down 5-7% on my BRAND FUCKING NEW silver positions, AG and PSYS. This shit, mind you, cannot be made up.

You have no right to follow me into the depth of hades. I’m fucking stark raving mad and crave danger. This market is shitting itself. Did you hear me: shitting itself.

Punks are being sold the fuck out without notice, by lesbian margin clerks.

It’s 1929 all over again. It’s 2008 credit crisis, only this time we get to fuck the farmer. Fuck him and his seeds. May he drown in his fertilizer amongst pigs.

The dollar is rallying like it’s the cold war again. Keep in mind, we did kill Bin Laden. Don’t fuck with America, else we’ll murder you with our space weapons.

Into the bell, I am long the same shit I was this morning. I lost a few fingers and one arm; but I still have my penis, so all is good.

Asshole dip buyers are out and about. The raw commodity sector has been ravaged, coinciding with a spike in the dollar. Silver, natty, oil, cotton, alongside others, have been smashed. We saw this happen back in March and that led to an optimal buying opportunity. Will history repeat itself or is this the start of the ending?

Well, there is only one way to find out: buy the dip, else take your ball home and hide under the covers.

With my money, bravely, I am buying silver via PSLV and AG. For my personal, I’ve been buying PSLV every hour and will add to AG on 5% dips. Essentially, I have full faith in Bernanke, with regards to raping the dollar. Buying precious metals on any and all dips, over the past 5 years, has been a terrific trade. I’d be an idiot to not take a shot down here. For those of you who respect money, you can put stop losses.

I was never going to sell WNR. That fucker could’ve went to zero and I’d still be long. It’s one of those trades that is do or die. That’s me and I don’t expect you to act so irresponsible. After all, you fuckers have groceries to buy. “The Fly” is simply burning $100 bills to light his candles. Money, thanks to its overabundance, means nothing to me.

ALJ is posting numbers today. I expect more of the same. These fuckers can’t look a gift horse in its ugly face. Don’t worry: they will seek religion and get it right eventually. The crack spreads are not only sustaining high levels, but widening. Let crude come down; gasoline will remain high. Trust in that.

For those of you interested in new, under the radar, ideas: go check out TNAV.

As you know by now, earlier this morning “The Fly” was in flux, having a crisis of sorts, doubting his own logic pertaining to his grandiose investment decisions. Fast forward a few hours and his confidence is restored. Ten thousand apologies to any of you who were startled/worried about “The Fly’s” mental state, as he is back to urinating on homeless men and crafting new gravity hammers for the heads of his staff of amateur cold callers.

The WNR shall rise again.

On a separate note, silver is getting absolutely poleaxed here. Typically, I do not like to catch knives; but this shit is silly. It’s wax on/wax off in this motherfucker and people are being obliterated via high margin levels. Where silver stops bleeding is anyone’s guess. I took a shot, buying both AG and PSLV, just in case it bounces hard off these oversold levels. I realize Carlos Slim and anyone with a series 7 is short silver now. However, aside from the margin requirements at the CME, nothing has changed. The dollar will still go down and QE3 will happen.

Additionally, I added to my VCLK and ALJ positions because my cock, for lack of a better term, has been reattached.

A great man once said “The Fly wins all the time, even when he appears to have all but wiped himself off the globe.” Indeud.

It is ongoing.

They took 30+ mill in hedging losses and 45-55 mill in EBITDA losses due to an outage in February. They are now 20% hedged going forward, but will not add new hedges this quarter, as they believe spreads will remain wide.

Their goal is to hedge a max of 25% at historic cracks and pay down debt.

My take: WNR was being conservative in Q1, but will take on more risk in Q2. The potential for a blowout quarter in Q2, due to their refineries operating at full capacity, no signs of demand destruction and potential sale of their Yorktown refinery, coupled with historically high spreads, seems likely. Although this company has disappointed in Q1, their reasons are rational and the stock is extraordinarily oversold and undervalued at current levels.

I will be adding to this position.

I added to my ALJ position.

UPDATE: I started a new position in PSLV.

UPDATE II: I started a new position, buying AG.

UPDATE III: I added to my VCLK position.

I sold out of TZA

I am not being melodramatic or overly emotional about the contents of this post. I am offering you a general diagnosis of my performance and how I am in great need of “adjustment” in order to correct the treacherous path I find myself on.

I will reserve full judgement on WNR’s earnings miss until after the conference call. However, I think it’s fair to say, I did not expect them to miss during an environment of unbridled gift horses. It’s as if they are spastic retards, wheel chairing their way through life, getting knocked into oncoming traffic by other retards with whiffle ball bats. To think that I have aligned myself with people who get escorted into oncoming traffic by way of whiffle ball bat is reprehensible and it makes me sick.

As I drove around in my garbage truck this morning, I concluded that my recent string of set backs had nothing to do with the lack of proper ritual, sacrificing the house pets of my neighbors in exchange for unlimited stock market powers. You see, it’s all a lie, one giant fib, so why put credence into said fib? In other words, this will be the last stock that I buy based upon a thesis. For me, it’s an end of an era. In essence, my “thesis penis” has been cut off.

Other refiners like TSO and HOC have normal management teams, who do not get involved with fucktards wielding whiffle ball bats for sport. The consequences of my actions have been matched with loss of pride, dignity and monetary reserves.

“The Fly” will need to kill a great many people before his thirst for anger and bloodshed is quenched. He will need to be smart about his next moves and rely upon his time machine aka The PPT more than ever.

As an aside, there are no redeeming qualities about this tape. I will look into increasing the size of my downside plays a great deal, especially long TZA, as this market looks tired, old and woefully gay.

In closing, if you followed me into battle and lost a few arms or legs, I am sorry for your loss. It’s important to remember “they are only arms and legs” and as long as you have a penis left, life is worth pursuing.