iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,443 Blog Posts

Ha, Ha, Ha: Land Mine Hopping

Fuck this shit. I dodge nuclear detonation this morning with a WNR reversal, only to fall victim of a heinous margin liquidation fueled run on silver. I am down 5-7% on my BRAND FUCKING NEW silver positions, AG and PSYS. This shit, mind you, cannot be made up.

You have no right to follow me into the depth of hades. I’m fucking stark raving mad and crave danger. This market is shitting itself. Did you hear me: shitting itself.

Punks are being sold the fuck out without notice, by lesbian margin clerks.

It’s 1929 all over again. It’s 2008 credit crisis, only this time we get to fuck the farmer. Fuck him and his seeds. May he drown in his fertilizer amongst pigs.

The dollar is rallying like it’s the cold war again. Keep in mind, we did kill Bin Laden. Don’t fuck with America, else we’ll murder you with our space weapons.

Into the bell, I am long the same shit I was this morning. I lost a few fingers and one arm; but I still have my penis, so all is good.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=er8ouaMCuv8 616 500] If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

79 comments

  1. MOOBER

    Pack that shit in ice. They can reattach it.

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  2. Kwame Brown

    Call the police.

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  3. gringo

    you have a sense of humour [sic], which is worth a lot.

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  4. Omon Ortza

    I just sat back and ate a bunch of ripe mangoes, 8 to be exact, as the market sold off…
    Alright, so I got mango shrapnel all over my beard, but i still have all of my arms, legs and toes and my wiener, not to be confused with….oh never mind. fuck this shit.

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    • Dishobgyn

      Soon you are going to have diarrhea

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      • Dishobgyn

        Then you are going to need your hands and fingers to clean rhe mess

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        • Omon Ortza

          LOL…no way! Raw, pure, ripe, sweet fruit doesn’t do that!
          Although I bet if your diet is full of toxic, processed food and animal carcass and very little fiber, than maybe.

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  5. tatertot

    I know what I’m having for dinner.

    Frozen solid too

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  6. ruggyup

    Reflecting on the last line, thank God for small favors.

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  7. Johnny2time

    Looking for $77 to $78 in the DXY currently short FXE. Then will load the fucking boat with silver bullion.

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  8. theedge111

    Whoa!

    At least we have the Fed to bail us out again…Oh wait…Thats right…There broke this go around. We are so fucked beyond recognition I don’t have words to describe it..

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  9. Prospectus

    Volatility is blowing up. Probably the best trade is VIX…

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  10. go2mars

    I underestimated fuckery potential in the silver market.

    http://maxkeiser.com/2011/05/05/guest-post-the-big-lie/#more-27028

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  11. Blind Read Ant
    Blind Read Ant

    Great music! My studies have permitted me to slice into el WNR. Probably taking my WNR winnings around $ 17. While I’m at it, possible WYNN opportunity if equities start bull quash and commod. squash gravity bong hit style.

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  12. HalfBloodPope

    Feeling the pain. I imagine it must be like passing a large kidney stone. Off to the gym to use my rage in a constructive manner.

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  13. hahaha

    wnr = hero

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  14. Wilco

    ALJ ALJ ALJ ALJ !!!

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  15. lil homie

    Thats what I m talking about go in without fear. Feliz Cinco de Mayo time to get wasted.

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  16. flyaway18

    I’m beginning to think AGQ could drop to $150 here.

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  17. Carsony

    I should have sold wnr this morning when I was up 33 dollars
    Instead I held it to long and just broke even. Lol

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  18. AlphaBetaBanjo
    AlphaBetaBanjo

    VIX overbought

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  19. J. Cramer

    I thought about ZSL 2 days ago but said noooooo, SLV already down 20% – too late. Silver is melted and running sown the drain – rout rout rout! I have a little – too little, TVIX for watching something green.

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  20. Trading Nymph

    OK, If analysis is correct…then China Copper Dealers may start to panic. But what about tomorrow? We have 2 dove Fed members giving speeches and of course NFP (non farm payroll). If number is inline we will just ignore data and continue our trend down. If REALLY Good, we should get a major boost in the US Dollar cuz Ben can’t QE us. If REALLY BAD, we could get a relief rally cuz the Clam can QE3, but if China dumps Commodities like they did last night…what the heck would anyone buy?

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    • Alvari40

      Nympho –

      Interesting point but have you accounted for deflationary fears. My read today is that, given the news this week, we are starting to discount that fear back into the market. So, I would amend you call on the REALLY BAD to read “short term shit fest and then get a relief rally cuz…blah, blah, blah”. The short term shit fest could last a couple of days until everyone realizes that the downside was overshot and now there may be a chance for the bearded one to work his magic.

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      • Trading Nymph

        Alvari… Here comes the fun part. UK and ECB are basically saying that they will risk deflation to get things under control and won’t do that crazy 2009 money printing. China is on that band wagon too cuz they really have worries about their banks, evident by their recent Bank Stress test. So europe is slowing, China is slowing, India went all balls in on Monday to slow…will the Clam really have the power to QE? Of course we will always get relief rallys, but that Sept QE2 may be it. Boy I hope so…..I am really interested to watch how this bubble pops, it has to, bubbles always do.

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        • Trading Nymph

          But those darn Wingnut Futures are still up, rofl….Actually the India Spot Ore is still up and hasn’t rolled yet. The India Govt is dragging in releasing export licences after they lost their Court Case to stop exports. Monsoon Season will be starting, so everyone wants to restock…but so far restocking not so hot even with India Govt being dicks.

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  21. Prospectus

    Free NYSE logo straightjacket with every trade confirmation slip

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  22. ottnott

    I’m about to go long on a house, so I’d appreciate it if all you argentumphiliacs sweat it out another few days until I lock in our mortgage rate.

    Much obliged.

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    • Quint

      Don’t lock, stall, they’re going lower…I’ll be getting a 2% mortgage this fall.

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      • ottnott

        I’ll need to show up with something more than old fishing hooks at closing. Have any severed limbs handy?

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  23. Quint

    Anyone still wondering if there are speculators in the commodity markets anymore?

    Did the fundies really change that much in 4 days, or was the fundy argument just an excuse by speculators?

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    • go2mars

      The biggest speculator position is in the US dollar. It’s shocking that so many people speculate that it will somehow overcome the overwhelmingly large debt obligations that it is tied to. The rapid barrage of margin changes in silver are a desperate move to shatter things down enough for JPMorgan to unload its short position. How low will silver go? As low as they want it to in the very short term. I am not in it for the very short term. I “speculate” that a useful limited resource (silver) is a better store of value than the USD. USD speculators (“U-specs”) can be forgiven because they are stupid, they are paid in the dross known as Federal Reserve Notes, and it has worked out quite well throughout recent memory. Students of history will easily recognize that the outcome of the game is extrememely well established, and are heading to the parking lot early to beat traffic (to use an analogy).

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    • A Monkey with the Crystal Fucking Balls and No Dumb Fucking Rose Colort Glasses (can we still say colort?)
      A Monkey with the Crystal Fucking Balls and No Dumb Fucking Rose Colort Glasses (can we still say colort?)

      Its all that demand in China, right?

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  24. pitbull

    nymph love the FX info fxcm has great articulate articles, jamie @ fxcm does daily updates, great
    looks ike 5th wave ..time for bounce ..then wave 3 down…if that was blow-off osama top.
    Means lower double top ! no fib 14,300 for S&P .

    we still in line for a 117-121 fib extension on oil ? OR
    like i said down wave 3..yes..with debt limit bs
    since Oil and S&P were Corrlatiing…if they don’t and break it ! ..like a war..in mid-east again .
    decending .wave 3 on for S&P.
    update FLY < UP 1.2 % on silver monday! watch

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  25. spy007

    Silver Wheaton after the dust i may look at getting this.

    Its the end of the world in 2012 anyway i am pure bull till then lol

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  26. The Bernank

    I told you last week that inflation was a “temporary” problem. So I took care of it for you right away. Now stop making those little bears videos about the Fed causing inflation, will you folks? What would you common folk do without me and the Fed and our wonderful powers of omnipotence?

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  27. HalfBloodPope

    I realize I am breaking etiquette here by posting a link however this seems like an appropriate video for the times. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlY

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  28. Quint

    Wow, you get a few percent down in the market and the monkeys come out on CNBC declaring bubbles bursting everywhere…what idiots.

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  29. razorsedge

    when will alj give earnings,,,what time.

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  30. whatthehay

    Keep trading the FLY contrarian indicator. Huge money by shorting his longs and selling puts when he spreads panic. I’m trying to get this indicator on my scanning software! U da boy flyless.

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  31. Alvari40

    “I am down 5-7% on my BRAND FUCKING NEW silver positions, AG and PSYS. This shit, mind you, cannot be made up”

    Fly,

    please ‘splain yourself

    Many thanks

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    • A Monkey with the Crystal Fucking Balls and No Dumb Fucking Rose Colort Glasses (can we still say colort?)
      A Monkey with the Crystal Fucking Balls and No Dumb Fucking Rose Colort Glasses (can we still say colort?)

      Silver and Gold and over for the Summer.

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  32. whatthehay

    The Fly says:
    May 5, 2011 at 9:08 am
    Yes, I am becoming quite good, through all this practice, at owning up to losses.

    Reply
    Whathehay says:
    May 5, 2011 at 10:00 am
    That’s the market. It is mangagments job to mess up the company. Ours is to read the charts – not the brayings of a donkey fly.

    Reply
    Yowza says:
    May 5, 2011 at 11:31 am
    Dem sold puts is workin out jest fine. Thank you FLY and friends for the free 43% in premium deflation in the course of a few hours. You are so gracious. Please keep selling your common.

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  33. Frog

    U have me stumped, Alvari. What is there to explain? He just bought them today. He’s already down. Oh, he meant PSLV.

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  34. razorsedge

    some posted to me: i bet you go around town yelling the sky is falling, my reply was not in my concrete house,(cash) my thought was where to invest to protect myself, 1 pos at this point and it wont hurt up or down,,,,

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  35. The Fly

    Banned fuckface.

    I’ve been bowling on you mother fuckers for 5 years here and you punks always talk shit during downturns.

    Suck my balls

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  36. ErnieCatface

    To the tune of 16 tons —-

    7lbs; 8oz ; and 19 inches,
    And what do ya get,
    Another day older and deeper in debt.

    But ya still got your WNR — and the balls of a freaking Lion. Very impressive.

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  37. razorsedge

    fly :hey i posted thanks for all u do. i made money on flk,wnr…im not saying anything bad about u,period

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  38. Frog

    Ben did all this to the markets to solve what he said just last week was “temporary” inflation.

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  39. razorsedge

    startin to think the gov was in oil contracts.gold,silver..hummm

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  40. Testicules

    Who’s building FEMA trailers this year?

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    • razorsedge

      i head ther just givin out cardbord boxes this year as the gov is broke n there easier to store at the airport

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    • Wilco

      Haliburton got that contract.

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  41. Hugh Hendry

    It’s time to do the Hugh fucking Hendry

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  42. alucard

    Fly , do you ever tire of catching falling knives ?

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    • razorsedge

      why come here to post sarcasum? there r many sites.

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  43. Wilco

    Fly – it’s 7:30 pm and no earnings release, did ALJ’s investor relations department say to hell with it let’s go celebrate Cinco de Mayo.

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  44. Wilco

    Beat by 3 cents,,,,I like it!!!

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  45. Wilco

    From Alon release:
    “Our adjusted EBITDA for the first quarter of 2011 improved substantially to $98.5 million by having the Big Spring and Krotz Springs refineries operate near full capacity with the improved refining margin environment for the entire quarter.

    “Our retail and branded marketing segment had adjusted EBITDA of $7.5 million in the first quarter of 2011 and over the last twelve months through March 31, 2011, adjusted EBITDA was $38.9 million.

    “We are very encouraged by the current refining margin environment and look forward to having our California refining assets operational in full in June 2011.”

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    • razorsedge

      thanks wilco. it sucks that it was so late. wanted to see mkt reaction..

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  46. Mr 8 ball

    But what about billet prices?
    Also, is Pluto in Saturn’s shadow? If so, sell pork bellies.

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  47. razorsedge

    http://youtu.be/q-ssZeOZkWU

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    • razorsedge

      this is the flys band.

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      • drummerboy

        i cant fucking believe you found that. i have some personal stories about him and i that go back to when i was 23……and let me just say, i, got a blasting from him in a different way. called old man ludwig to do his dirty work. cause i heckled him at a show the night before,there was maybe 30 people at this club at the time,so the scene was way different then………but james brown was the exact same way, shit i can give you a list.

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